Peoples perspective of me hasn't changed as much as i have. People's first impression of me never leaves them, and they treat me like crap, and they spread rumors and make other people treat me poorly. It's a huge road block in my life, and it makes me take 2 steps back when i take 1 forward. I need HELP!!!!!
"The Kiss of Death Mistake"
You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?
Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.
One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.
Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.
The Hugest Road Block On My Path To Dj!!! Help!
- Thread starter Rint
- Start date
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Yeah, first impressions are hard to change. Honestly, I would just stop caring what these other people thought of you; if they don't like you, they aren't worth your time.
Of course, if what they were doing is having a serious negative impact on your life, you shouldn't just let it be. I'd consider confronting them about what they're doing. Be calm, but also be stern. Let them know that you don't like what they're doing, and if they keep it up you'll start to retaliate. How you retaliate is up to you, of course, since I don't know that much about the specifics of your situation, but NEVER let people get away with **** that is actually negatively affecting your life.
Of course, if what they were doing is having a serious negative impact on your life, you shouldn't just let it be. I'd consider confronting them about what they're doing. Be calm, but also be stern. Let them know that you don't like what they're doing, and if they keep it up you'll start to retaliate. How you retaliate is up to you, of course, since I don't know that much about the specifics of your situation, but NEVER let people get away with **** that is actually negatively affecting your life.
Solutions:Rint said:
- Make new first impressions, which means meet new people.
- Reverse your image by countering poor treatment with confidence and civility. Develop thick skin.
- Spread positive notions about other people. Negativity breeds negativity. You can only defeat negative thinking by nurturing a positive atmosphere.
- You control your feet, even in shackles. Step forward. Resist backtracking.
It starts off with alot of ppl didn like the AFK me then they spread word so when i tried to meet new people they gave me the cold shoulder, and then agree that i'm annoying and weird. So it flows through out the school. If i could find the people who started it i'd ****ing kill them, but right now i dont know who to hate and who to like
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
Stop acting like a child and grow up. You will encounter rumors and criticism about you throughout your entire life, especially if you embark on a career that involves gaining recognition in some manner. Develop thick skin and let your balls hang out. Be confident in who you are and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Let's see if you're mature enough to maintain a positive attitude when you read this...Rint said:
johnny_unitas
New Member
It sounds as though you're already thinking this and it's showing in your body language. People judge you before you even start talking to them. I think you should start small with people, join in conversations with statements that show you just don't care what these 'cool kids' think of you.
johnny_unitas
New Member
I'd recommend reading Tucker Max for a few examplesl. A real care free attitude lol.
Doggystyle
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The way you talk or carry youself can give off a big impression, since turning around the way i talk seem to be treating with more authority in the work place and all eyes are on me in social situation, i.e. a group of people and when anyone else talks they look at me.
Try talking louder and clearer (forget about deeper unless you squeek like a mouse) with no hint of uneasyness in your voice, make sure you body language in congruent to it or you won't pull in off.
becareful not to over do it, you will look like a try hard tool
Try talking louder and clearer (forget about deeper unless you squeek like a mouse) with no hint of uneasyness in your voice, make sure you body language in congruent to it or you won't pull in off.
becareful not to over do it, you will look like a try hard tool
This is the easiest potential solution: just get into a few fights. You don't even have to win them (big plus if you do, though). Just put up a decent showing, and people will soon get the hint that you're not a person to be fvcked with. It really is that simple. Now, if you go to a hardcore school, where getting into a fight can be life threatening, well, this might not be the best advice.
Honestly, I'm amazed at Demon's advice, "be confident". Well, duh. No shyt. How to develop that confidence is what it's all about. Jeezus. You'd think after five years a guy would have learnt something, but nope, he's telling people "be the ball, jimmy".
Honestly, I'm amazed at Demon's advice, "be confident". Well, duh. No shyt. How to develop that confidence is what it's all about. Jeezus. You'd think after five years a guy would have learnt something, but nope, he's telling people "be the ball, jimmy".
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
Doggystyle
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MIKE.T said:
Yeah get into lots of fights! Grrreat advice!!!!
I see all those kids from school now who used to fight working in the local factories packing boxes....living the dream!
squirrels
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Who controls your life? You or them?Rint said:
This isn't a "roadblock on your journey" you're talking about...this IS your journey. Becoming a Don Juan is about becoming master of your own life instead of being ruled by other people's opinions. Otherwise how are you going to play dominant male to a beautiful woman? She will walk all OVER you.