The feeling of oneitis vs mutual interest...

[Skyline]

This experience basically convinced me that women will not confuse you when they're interested. You will know.

Today, I'm here to share a feeling that you get when you have interest in a girl and she is interested in you as well. I recently found out about this feeling when it just hit me randomly like a ton of bricks.

One of my co-workers was dropping a lot of signals but she would never follow through for a date. So I assumed there was someone else and I decided to talk to other women while pulling back a bit. However, during that time it was like I could feel her interest to the point that it literally felt like we had a "connection." Every time we saw each other, it felt like it was hard to get enough of each other- and it wasn't just me that couldn't. Even when I was out trying to spin plates, I just couldn't get enough of her for some reason.

But then one day, I saw her and that strong connection that I felt before basically VANISHED. She didn't get fat, she didn't do something gross, and she didn't disrespect me... I simply lost that connection that I felt prior. That's when it just felt like oneitis. I can sense that she still has interest in me but it's not as extreme like before. It's the EXACT same with me. It just felt like oneitis.

Shortly after loosing that feeling, I learned that there was someone else in the picture. I'm not sure if it was my gut telling me this but I was spot on. For me personally, my gut has been right pretty often lately.

A woman who is interested in you will not confuse you!

 

[Obsidian]

I don't understand your post. Who lost interest in whom? Why would you feel oneitis if you lost interest?

 

[DaddyLongShanks]

This experience basically convinced me that women will not confuse you when they're interested. You will know.

Today, I'm here to share a feeling that you get when you have interest in a girl and she is interested in you as well. I recently found out about this feeling when it just hit me randomly like a ton of bricks.

One of my co-workers was dropping a lot of signals but she would never follow through for a date. So I assumed there was someone else and I decided to talk to other women while pulling back a bit. However, during that time it was like I could feel her interest to the point that it literally felt like we had a "connection." Every time we saw each other, it felt like it was hard to get enough of each other- and it wasn't just me that couldn't. Even when I was out trying to spin plates, I just couldn't get enough of her for some reason.

But then one day, I saw her and that strong connection that I felt before basically VANISHED. She didn't get fat, she didn't do something gross, and she didn't disrespect me... I simply lost that connection that I felt prior. That's when it just felt like oneitis. I can sense that she still has interest in me but it's not as extreme like before. It's the EXACT same with me. It just felt like oneitis.

Shortly after loosing that feeling, I learned that there was someone else in the picture. I'm not sure if it was my gut telling me this but I was spot on. For me personally, my gut has been right pretty often lately.

A woman who is interested in you will not confuse you!

Hey bro.

In long term real relationships, you will not always have "that feeling" or "butterflies". You have real life. In the first moments of attraction if you are out there like that you can have those feelings, also they can come and go as you desire your significant other.h

 

[BrainDamage92]

This mutual attraction thingy is BS, the girl just liked you and started working her charms so you got affected of course. Carefull with coworkers as you know.

 

[Skyline]

I don't understand your post. Who lost interest in whom? Why would you feel oneitis if you lost interest?

That's the thing. I feel like we didn't loose interest in each other but she's not "head over heels" like she was before. There's no point in trying to game her anymore because I will be confronted with games. Therefore, it would be oneitis if I DIDN'T move on.

Hey bro.

In long term real relationships, you will not always have "that feeling" or "butterflies". You have real life. In the first moments of attraction if you are out there like that you can have those feelings, also they can come and go as you desire your significant other.h

I'm not experienced in Long term relationships so I can't say exactly what's right or wrong. But I can see those feelings not being as intense in the long run.

This mutual attraction thingy is BS, the girl just liked you and started working her charms so you got affected of course. Carefull with coworkers as you know.

Yeah I agree with that. It's like the second she stopped gaming me I picked up on it.

And yes, the co-worker thing is a first time for me so I was treading unusually carefully.

 

[Obsidian]

Could just be the effects of the menstrual cycle. Give her 1-2 weeks and she'll love you again.

 

[DaddyLongShanks]

That's the thing. I feel like we didn't loose interest in each other but she's not "head over heels" like she was before. There's no point in trying to game her anymore because I will be confronted with games. Therefore, it would be oneitis if I DIDN'T move on.



I'm not experienced in Long term relationships so I can't say exactly what's right or wrong. But I can see those feelings not being as intense in the long run.



Yeah I agree with that. It's like the second she stopped gaming me I picked up on it.

And yes, the co-worker thing is a first time for me so I was treading unusually carefully.

What I'm saying is that feeling COMES and it GOES. So don't count yourself out.

 

[Skyline]

I forgot the menstral cycle was even a thing to be honest... Her interest going in and out probably has something to do with it but I'm gonna trust my gut with there being someone else. But don't worry, I'll still be my naturally slightly flirty self around her. Plus I have other female co-workers... I can see her coming around eventually.

And Ruler, it's because she is a co-worker. I've never been in a situation like this and if I did anything and she complained, then that's sexual harassment. That looks really bad for when I go to apply to be a cop.

So, I did a combination of doing nothing and lightly flirting. I was definitely in doubt, so I did nothing in the beginning. It probably bite me in the *ss to be honest. I knew I should have escalated in the beginning, based off of her pace, but my future is FAR more important.

 

[9Volt]

This experience basically convinced me that women will not confuse you when they're interested. You will know.

Today, I'm here to share a feeling that you get when you have interest in a girl and she is interested in you as well. I recently found out about this feeling when it just hit me randomly like a ton of bricks.

One of my co-workers was dropping a lot of signals but she would never follow through for a date. So I assumed there was someone else and I decided to talk to other women while pulling back a bit. However, during that time it was like I could feel her interest to the point that it literally felt like we had a "connection." Every time we saw each other, it felt like it was hard to get enough of each other- and it wasn't just me that couldn't. Even when I was out trying to spin plates, I just couldn't get enough of her for some reason.

But then one day, I saw her and that strong connection that I felt before basically VANISHED. She didn't get fat, she didn't do something gross, and she didn't disrespect me... I simply lost that connection that I felt prior. That's when it just felt like oneitis. I can sense that she still has interest in me but it's not as extreme like before. It's the EXACT same with me. It just felt like oneitis.

Shortly after loosing that feeling, I learned that there was someone else in the picture. I'm not sure if it was my gut telling me this but I was spot on. For me personally, my gut has been right pretty often lately.

A woman who is interested in you will not confuse you!

Had the same chit happen to me bro with a hot chick I worked with. All "IOI's" smiling, talking, laughing, coming up to me to bs several times, asking questions, got her number, texted occasionally but was busy with my life and took it as her being friendly and or looking for attention. Had her ask me twice in person to text her. My thoughts immediately were this chick could just text me but I figured what the hell let me prove myself right on what I suspected (she either had someone or was unsure about someone "better" but wanted attention /wanted to be chased. F that) though not to be "negative" just in case my gut was wrong..I texted then invited her out. Gave me the "Ill let you know" line. Dropped it and went with friends on my own. Before that happened it must've killed the chick that I never asked again or followed up and the night before came up to me with a sick excuse (she was sick) but I hadn't heard a peep about anything the entire week before she was "supposed to let me know" I dropped it and kept it moving.

I either suspect she was dating someone or was unsure about some other dude and was trying to use me for ego attention. F that. I ask once then I'm going with my plans regardless.

The only true "IOI" is a chick showing up to go out. All other "IOI's" are meaningless.