The Dreaded Oneitis

[yungballa]

I'm a freshman and I just had my first day of high school. I saw this girl who I used to like a couple years ago.

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Now keep in mind, I was a horrible ass AFC back in the day; nothing but a fool deep in love. I mean, DEEP. She was also aware that I was attracted to her, and at the time, she was in no way attracted to me. Of course, I was the loser and I didn't get her and she went to some other guy. But then I grew older, and as I grew older and time passed, I eventually forgot about my pain and thankfully, her. I just didn't give a fvck about her anymore.

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Since then, I've come a long way and have made a lot of improvements, and I proud to say that I have forgotten her. Aaaaand now we have the same highschool and the same classes. The moment I saw her in class my heart SUNK. WHY? My heart was thumping so hard it was like it was ready to break free and leap out from my chest. I definitely don't think I have any feelings for her, so, why? I've gamed a lot of girls since then and I have a completely different mindset, plus I stopped having oneitis for any girl. Of course, when I saw her I wanted to game her real quick for the fun of it (just like any other girl), not because I'm still attracted to her or anything. So why, when she draws near am I so uneasy? Someone please tell me. I hate to say this, but... Maybe it's oneitis?
(NOTE: I have some bad memories with her...)​

 

[defensiveend96]

I can relate to this in a way. About 4 months ago or so I was rejected by my oneitis. Sure it bothered me for a bit throughout the summer but I didnt waste my time thinking about her because she wasn't worth my time. Instead I spent my time working out and getting ready for football season. During my training, I lost a good amount of body fat and put on some muscle. Mind you, I had been training since before my oneitis rejected me but I trained harder after the rejection. I am actually glad she did reject me because then I wouldn't have improved myself. I look a lot better now, and I realize that I don't need her because I can get many different girls. So, basically you need to use the time you waste thinking about her on something else. It can be anything that will improve yourself. Sports, school, instruments, learn something new, whatever. Just don't waste time thinking about her. The feelings will pass and you will notice you don't think about her at all. If you are getting uneasy or nervous around her you may still have feelings for her. So keep yourself occupied. And since you are in school now you have a lot of girls to talk to. Trust me man, I actually think my "oneitis" is annoying now.

 

[yungballa]

I can relate to this in a way. About 4 months ago or so I was rejected by my oneitis. Sure it bothered me for a bit throughout the summer but I didnt waste my time thinking about her because she wasn't worth my time. Instead I spent my time working out and getting ready for football season. During my training, I lost a good amount of body fat and put on some muscle. Mind you, I had been training since before my oneitis rejected me but I trained harder after the rejection. I am actually glad she did reject me because then I wouldn't have improved myself. I look a lot better now, and I realize that I don't need her because I can get many different girls. So, basically you need to use the time you waste thinking about her on something else. It can be anything that will improve yourself. Sports, school, instruments, learn something new, whatever. Just don't waste time thinking about her. The feelings will pass and you will notice you don't think about her at all. If you are getting uneasy or nervous around her you may still have feelings for her. So keep yourself occupied. And since you are in school now you have a lot of girls to talk to. Trust me man, I actually think my "oneitis" is annoying now.

Thanks for the advice :rockon: . I wouldn't say I'm uneasy or nervous because I have feelings for
her I think it's because she just brings back some bad memories .

Anyway, you right, I won't let this one girl ruin it for me. After all, at the end
of the day they all just girls nd there's a million more :crackup: ain't my fault they missing out. Anyway, I'ma keep on improving now.

 

[veriv]

Hey man

You keep saying you don't care about her/don't have feelings for her/no longer get oneitis...

but then you keep contradicting this by saying how when you see her your heart beats really fast, you get nervous.

Basically you need to start being honest with yourself first.

 

[Zapp Brannigan]

You sound a lot like me. I had a very similar experience, and still have feelings for former oneitius aswell.

Since you still have feelings for her, you must care about her on a deeper level. There's nothing wrong with that, just continue with your life, and keep searching for the right girl.

 

[Watawata]

Sometimes you revert to your old self when you're around people that you knew during that period of time. May be just that