the drastic state of our formally fine forums

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Microphone Fiend

Master Don Juan

Apr 20, 2006

but if you "take the initiative to solve your own problems" (your words not mines) then why do you need to ask questions?

It really is a question of perception. A person who asks questions after a month seems stupid because you have seen it answered a lot, but to the person that has been here 6 years, dont all of your questions seem stupid?

Just keep a positive outlook on the forum and it will be reflected by the new posters. A good bit of the new posters are full of negativity and recurring problems. Why is that? Showing them more negativity doesnt seem to be the answer

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.