The "disrespect" technique

[Sp1kez]

OK, as many of you know the disrespect technique (when they wont answer calls or find time to go out with you or cancel a date, you tell them that you wont put up with that etc) is a pretty good technique, that is, if the girl will take it lightly.....


Over the past year I've used this technique and have found that most of the girls that I say that to, run away scared and forget about me.....only 2 have fallen for it and called back to say sorry etc....

This leads me to my latest pick up,

Met her when I was out with some friends, kept ****y & funny attitude all night and she was all over me, starting kino etc.

Next day int he morning at 10am i get a txt msg from her...."hey you are a sweetheart", bout 10 minutes later "you should come to ______ for lunch "

later that day I txted her and everything went smooth for the next 2 days, I met her at school one day between classes , then that day we went to eat lunch after school together, everything was great.....(this was wed)

Thursday comes and we txt msg each other while at school then after school she wouldnt reply or answer when I called her.......that night I called again and she didnt answer.......so I sent her a message saying that if she isnt going to answer then im not going to waste my time calling her anymore......no reply.

The next day (friday) i see her ont he hallway and as she passes me she says "are u mad at me? i was sleeping!" and i didnt say anything, just said hi, then she texts me during the last class and says "ill call u after school" .........after school comes and she doesnt call, at night I call her to see if she wants to spend some time w/ me....no answer, sent txt msg, no reply.......so far saturday and sunday and monday she hasnt replied to my msgs.......


Can you guys tell me what I did wrong? I know I should just move on and NEXT her, but I really want to be w/ this one (wuss) , is there any way I can salvage this?

 

[Rockadeimis]

Stop calling and messaging...she'll come if she's interested. Don't seem so needy, even if you don't think you appear to be, she might think so.

 

[Sp1kez]

Might be too late for that, She hasnt contacted me in 3 days =( , I just dont see what i did wrong..........I got her interested and then i guess i became a wuss coz i talked to her so much? I can get them pretty easily, but I have trouble keeping them.......for some reason after I get em , I kinda drop the C+F......I dont know.....its burning me up .........she played me !

 

[Qmanchoo]

Too serious too soon.

You need a longer time frame because **** happens sometimes and people can't always get back to you (24-36 hours is usually good), she didn't play you- you came across way too serious and scared her off.

This whole "I don't tolerate flaky behavior" thing should be used, imo, when she legitimately flaked on you for something that matters and you know it as fact 100%, otherwise a little c/f line about her being a flake is a little better because it's still cute and funny but don't come across so serious.

Picture a girl txt'ing that to _YOU_ after only knowing you for a couple of days and you really were not avoiding her calls or texts but you lost your phone and couldn't get back to her.

I say to myself "Jesus, what's this girls deal? It's not like we are married! Next!"

In this case the girl probably thought you were honestly mad at her for not calling you back.

Think about what makes sense to you in your head and trust your gut. If things are going well don’t take some random technique you learned that doesn't feel _natural_ and wrench up the works.

Learning techniques on how to get girls can hurt you just as much as it can help you depending on if you use them correctly and in the right situation.

 

[Sp1kez]

We only met........I didnt ask her out on a txt msg , she asked me if I could have lunch with her after school......


Qmanchoo, what do you think would have been a better way of busting her on it but not coming out as too serious?

Either case, this is a lost project....just trying to learn from mistakes

 

[Sp1kez]

Originally posted by SuperGigaloDJ
Ohhh. You'll be suprised how fast a HB can put you in the friend zone.

Thats the thing.....she was cute, not a HB, but i kinda wnated a relationship w/ her...not just hit it up........

She was all over me, she kept telling me she missed me and ****, then when she didnt answer i dropped the bomb and i guess i came out too strong with it.....


I just keep thinking about her and looking at my phone wondering if I should call........

 

[TillTheEndOfTime]

I'll tell you why girls get turned off when you call them out on ignoring your messages and phone calls.

You think you're coming off as some tough guy drawing a line in the sand, but all you're really doing is showing her that she is a source of happiness for you. When she doesn't do these things (return calls and messages) it makes you unhappy. This actually makes you look more wussy than tough. The best thing to do in these situations is to not even mention it. Start giving her the cold shoulder (but careful not to make it obvious you're mad at her for not answering you!). Keep your distance. If she really does like you, she will come running back.

 

[Qmanchoo]

I just keep thinking about her and looking at my phone wondering if I should call........ [/B]

Holy christ, if that thought is going through your head you really really need to get out of "the house" and do soemthing fun or interesting to get your mind off this girl. You're entering girly mode.

Qmanchoo, what do you think would have been a better way of busting her on it but not coming out as too serious?

Well, in this case you didn't need to bust on her. Honestly, you need to see the forest through the trees here man. Just chill it wasn't a big deal and you can't treat it like one.

Everything you say to this chick doesn't have to be C/F.

I think the solution to your issue right now might be to have 3-4 chicks going at once. That will solve these "must have this girl for relationship" thoughts since you'll always have an alternative.

but you're probably bust with this one.

 

[Sp1kez]

Good advice, thank you.


Qmanchoo, so are you saying that i shouldnt call her out on flaking when the relationship is too young? wouldnt that make you a wuss then if u just take her ****?

 

[Mister Big]

Originally posted by SuperGigaloDJ
There are millions of hot girls out there.

Trust us. This is true. Until you get more confident, I suggest dating more women a lot less seriously. Keeping yourself very busy and dating is the most appealing approach for you right now.

Good luck.

 

[jprjrjr]

You're acting like a fvcking wuss..KNOCK IT OFF!!!!

I think it's good to draw a line in the sand, but be willing to stick to it. A lot of girls will run when you do this, but they'll always have it in their head that some guy didn't take her ****. If anything, maybe she won't give the next guys she's with so much trouble.


I've had experiences where I drew the line, and the girl went away. Good riddence I say, but somewhere down the line, they try contacting you again. I think if more guys did this, it would change women's behavior.

Good luck bro.

 

[Qmanchoo]

Originally posted by Sp1kez
Good advice, thank you.


Qmanchoo, so are you saying that I shouldn't call her out on flaking when the relationship is too young? wouldnt that make you a wuss then if u just take her ****?

No, what I'm saying...in the context of your situation...I think you were too SERIOUS with her too early.

Think playfull.

Especially when texting, I learned this in the business world a long time ago but people usually default to 1 of two very basic emotions "he's using a negative ton" or "he's using positive tone" when reading text since they obviosuly can't hear your voice or see you. And it can be hard to effectively commnicate the tone you're looking for with words.

You should have just called her once and left a C/F message and forgot about her until she finally called you back. Twice was a red flag and the txt message was the killer. Rule of thumb is to call a girl that's _already interested_ in you once for every two times she calls you and make sure the conversation is fun.

 

[chill]

case and point: you were good at first, got seriouse to fast, and are now so uncertain of yourself that you wont even leave your house. talk to her face to face! she cant ask you to leave a message then!

 

[belividere]

agree with everyone else.

One thing is that I dont ever tell a girl when she is disrespecting me like you do. I just drop them. Sounds like she was just calling your bluff.

 

[Mack 86]

Originally posted by Sp1kez
Might be too late for that, She hasnt contacted me in 3 days =( , I just dont see what i did wrong..........I got her interested and then i guess i became a wuss coz i talked to her so much? I can get them pretty easily, but I have trouble keeping them.......for some reason after I get em , I kinda drop the C+F......I dont know.....its burning me up .........she played me !

Hey man too many people give false information on this site and I didn't read through all of them and I will apologize if this situation has been taken care of already. Forget all the internet lingo the hb8 and all that sh1t it's not gonna help you man, think logically about it. She can be busy, doing work or anything so I think you need to take a few steps back with a deep breath and chill. Don't sweat her at all even if you are thinking about her all the time, act like she isn't stressing you, and then hit her back after a couple of days and see what's up. If she keeps ignoring you then I'd advise you to leave the situation alone and let it play out itself. If she comes back to you then great man but if she doesn't you were already prepared and on the search for another female it'll be a win-win situation for you regardless man good luck!

 

[penkitten]

Originally posted by Mack 86
Hey man too many people give false information on this site and I didn't read through all of them and I will apologize if this situation has been taken care of already. Forget all the internet lingo the hb8 and all that sh1t it's not gonna help you man, think logically about it. She can be busy, doing work or anything so I think you need to take a few steps back with a deep breath and chill. Don't sweat her at all eventhough you are thinking about her all the time act like she isn't stressing you. Then hit her back after a couple of days and see what's up. If she keeps ignoring you then I'd advise you to leave the situation alone and let it play out itself. If she comes back to you then great man but if she doesn't you were already prepared and on the search for another female. It'll be a win-win situation either way!

yah what he said :cheer:

 

[Sp1kez]

Ok heres an update of today's events:

After school Im walking on the hallway on the way out of school and I hear, "Hey boo" , I turn around it's her........I say "hey long time no see" and she immeditely says "I lost my phone in the house and its on vibration so I can't find it" so I tell her "do you have my number somewhere else?" and she says "I do now" and then i close with a hug.


I won't be calling this girl anymore until she calls me, if she doesn't call then that was it, GG no re.


(I know the phone thing is BS.......a "lost" phone doest last 5 days w/o recharging)

 

[Mack 86]

Originally posted by Sp1kez
Ok heres an update of today's events:

After school Im walking on the hallway on the way out of school and I hear, "Hey boo" , I turn around it's her........I say "hey long time no see" and she immeditely says "I lost my phone in the house and its on vibration so I can't find it" so I tell her "do you have my number somewhere else?" and she says "I do now" and then i close with a hug.


I won't be calling this girl anymore until she calls me, if she doesn't call then that was it, GG no re.


(I know the phone thing is BS.......a "lost" phone doest last 5 days w/o recharging)

Yes it does man anything is possible especially with vibrate on be logical. You are fukking it up for yourself and you are going to be the only one to blame. If she was saying what's up boo and all that jazz she obviously has some kind of interest in you man. You know that you want her real bad so stop fronting and go for it. I know for a fact that you had the biggest grin on your face when she acknowledged you man so go for it. If you didn't have deep feelings for her you wouldn't have asked us for advice. I think you need to get all this DJ sh1t out your brain and be yourself. Don't think that you have to be super smooth pimp daddy or what do you guys call that on here "SPSDJ7?" What most guys need to learn is how not to be suckers....smoothness comes with practice.