Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
i'm not trying to get bigger. If i were trying to get bigger i'd go to 1 body group a week to give my muscles more time to heel /recover. But I'm not trying to get smaller either I like my body the exact way it is now. if anything maybe lose another 1% of bodyfat but muscle wise i like exactly where i am now; good enough to fit anything skinny stylish clothes and still have a body where women double take when i take my shirt off but not so small to where i look like a runner/ emosigma335 said:No offense backbreaker but your routine is awful! Also you seeing no one using free weights at your gym is a function of the day/time of day you workout and the demographics of the gym/area where the gym is located.
Plus, with machines, there's very little clean-up involved at the close of business day. Employees are not working extra minutes reorganizing discarded plates and dumbbells.Victory Unlimited said:I think the decline of Free Weights at commercial gyms is also due to legal/insurance reasons. By reducing the amounts of free weights available, and instead steering their clientele towards using the machines, they accomplish two things:
1. They minimize their risks of being liable for any injuries that their gym members may suffer. And...
2. They increase their ability to advertise and appeal to a more gender-neutral client-base. As you know, the good part about weightlifting machines are that they can be more easily used by women as well as men.
V.U.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
BINGO!Victory Unlimited said:I think the decline of Free Weights at commercial gyms is also due to legal/insurance reasons. By reducing the amounts of free weights available, and instead steering their clientele towards using the machines, they accomplish two things:
1. They minimize their risks of being liable for any injuries that their gym members may suffer. And...
2. They increase their ability to advertise and appeal to a more gender-neutral client-base. As you know, the good part about weightlifting machines are that they can be more easily used by women as well as men.
V.U.
Isn't this way overkill? I'm new to Fitness and looking to grow since i fall into the skinny range. I've been using this workout by going 4 times a week to the gym and alternating between the two:cordoncordon said:This is my present routine. I circuit train while doing this. In other words I do one set of lets say incline DB press, go right to bench press, then right to incline flies, and so and so on with maybe 10 seconds rest between each exercise. Then when I finish a circuit I start it over again. This not only gives you a cardio workout as well, but also I can get done in 45 minutes or less. Don't know how these guys who do one thing like lets say a bench press, wait 3 minutes to rest, do another bench press, wait 3 minutes, do another bench press, then move to another exercise do it. Takes hours for them to work out. Have added around 10 pounds the past 4 months doing this, up to around 205 now. I will start cutting in a week or so down to 190. I also add in one session of cardio a week with this, and one day with an hour of yoga.
Monday: Chest/Biceps
4 sets of Incline Dumbbell Press, 8-10 reps
3 sets of Bench Press, 8-10 reps
3 sets of Incline Flies, 8-10 reps
3 sets of Chest Dips until failure
3 sets of Barbell Curls, 8-10 reps
3 sets of Preacher Curls, 8-10 reps, then drop the weight to half, and push out another 8
Tuesday: Legs/Calves
4 sets of Squats 8-10 reps
3 sets of Lunges 8-10 reps
3 sets of Leg Press 8-10 reps
3 sets of Leg Extensions till failure
3 sets of Leg Curls 8-10 reps
Calves are self explanatory, just use some of the machines till failure, a lot of reps, feel the burn.
Wednesday: Back
3 sets of Lat Pulldowns 8-10 reps
4 sets of Deadlifts 8-10 reps
3 sets of Bent Over Rows 8-10 reps
3 sets of Dumbell Rows 8-10 reps
3 sets of Hyperextensions 8-10 reps
Thursday: Shoulders/Triceps
4 sets of Shoulder Press, alternate with Barbell & Dumbell every week 8-10 reps
3 sets of Upright Rows supersetted with Lateral Raises 8-10 reps
3 sets of front raises 8-10 reps
3 sets of Lying Rear Delt Raises 8-10 reps
3 sets of Close-Grip Bench Press 8-10 reps
4 sets of Pulldowns 8-10 reps
3 sets of Skullcrushers 8-10 reps
Saturday: Full Body
3 sets of Deadlifts 8-10 reps
3 sets of Squats 8-10 reps
3 sets of Clean and Jerk 8-10 reps
3 sets of Weighted Pull ups 8-10 reps
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Warrior74 said:From what I notice around here, the men all go to crossfit and the "gyms" are all for women. There's women at crossfit too but they don't get all feminist about it, they know it's about bringing it.
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.