The curse of neediness and oneitis.

[Maxtro]

After going through what I just did, it's painfully obvious that I have huge issues with neediness. I'm also a huge sucker for oneitis and I've basically been bitten by it once every couple of years by a new girl.

This most recent time the damage was the most severe. Not only were the effects disastrous for myself. I hurt a poor innocent girl who thought of me as a good friend I feel so bad about what I've done to her. Through a mutual friend I know I really hurt this girl. I should not have gotten her involved with my problems.

Now my journey changes focus to find out why I am so needy and how to fix it. Searching the forums I came across a thread called ONEITIS - Lets Be Honest. It was a great read and it almost perfectly described my feelings for this girl. Hell it was so accurate it could have been written about me. Of course I had "oneitis when youve LJBF'ED"

For a while I thought I only had issues with sex. My drive for sex got so out of hand that I basically demanded it from a girl who thought she was my friend. But I think my insane desire for sex is only a symptom of a deeper problem. All men want sex, but it shouldn't be the most important thing in life.

Right now I'm in the stage of gathering information and I'm really seeking a cure. I've actually made an appointment with the university counselor for next week and I plan on talking about this issue with them. I really hope the counselor is able to help me in some way. I know I can beat this and I know it will be hard.

I seriously need to get my issues fixed. Or I will be having a very painful lonely life. It is so ironic that my intense desire to be with a woman will most likely drive them all away from me.

 

[Luke Skywalker]

For a while I thought I only had issues with sex. My drive for sex got so out of hand that I basically demanded it from a girl who thought she was my friend. But I think my insane desire for sex is only a symptom of a deeper problem. All men want sex, but it shouldn't be the most important thing in life.

You had a relationship on HER terms, not yours. You ate humble pie because you needed the friendship too but settled until something broke the camel's back - which was her going with the other guy. That went beyond your tolerance level. If she didn't lose her virginity with someone else, the friendship would still be there today. You had a soft spot and she touched a nerve -- she should have been more sensative.

Right now I'm in the stage of gathering information and I'm really seeking a cure. I've actually made an appointment with the university counselor for next week and I plan on talking about this issue with them. I really hope the counselor is able to help me in some way. I know I can beat this and I know it will be hard.

What will a councillor do? Hopefully he will help you cope with the rejection from this girl, or you doing anything crazy because of it. Fundamentally, the attraction wasn't there. Don't let this girl put you in the mad-house now and see a councilor. You give this girl too much power man.

I seriously need to get my issues fixed. Or I will be having a very painful lonely life. It is so ironic that my intense desire to be with a woman will most likely drive them all away from me.

But you cant get your issues fixed unless you have a selection of women who want you -- otherwise you always have that neediness.

Best thing to do is just get a fleshlight or continue masturbating to help contain your sexual needs.

 

[librito]

THIS BOARD HAS TAUGHT YOU A THOUSAND TIMES MORE ABOUT SEX AND WOMEN THAN YOUR SCHOOL COUNSELOR EVER WILL.
your problem is not that you love to have sex with hot girls...that is a sin that we are all guilty of.
your problem is that you dont know how to move on from women that you would reaaaaalllllllyyyyyy would like to fock but rejected you, or you havent learn the skills that are needed to seduce the girls would reeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaallllllllllllllllllyyyyy like to fock.
thats why we are here for brother, follow the DJ way and youll never be blinded by the power of the p-ussy, someday youll see the light at the end of they vagina.

 

[Maxtro]

I may be overanalyzing here..but I think YOU actually wrote that thread.

Because otherwise..you would have written this comment in THAT thread, an not on an entirely separate one like you did here...

and you wouldn't have bothered to go through all of the trouble and the steps to make the links/hyperlinks work.

Plus...you've been here since 2004..which leads me to believe you should know more shyt than the average cat here.

Plus..there's other things as well




if I'm wrong...then I'm happy for you..but nonetheless, I'm pretty sure I'm right.

ROFL. Yeah the thread is so accurate it's scary. Maybe muttley was channeling me when he did it. It's obviously not me since the witting styles are so different. I'm actually college educated

But yeah I've been here a very long time. Hell longer then you Killa. I could have written the freaking bible I'll just say that I'm a slow learner and I need to experience something to actually understand it.

Luke, sorry but I seriously can not take advice from you.

I am trying as many avenues as possible to attack the neediness. It should not be this strong. The counselor is simply an additional path.

Until I actually fix my issues I have no hope of getting girls. BTW of course laying a ton of hot chicks would get rid of my neediness. But I need to do things in order. The poor man can not ask for a a million dollars so he can have money.

 

[CapedCrusader08]

"THIS BOARD HAS TAUGHT YOU A THOUSAND TIMES MORE ABOUT SEX AND WOMEN THAN YOUR SCHOOL COUNSELOR EVER WILL.
your problem is not that you love to have sex with hot girls...that is a sin that we are all guilty of.
your problem is that you dont know how to move on from women that you would reaaaaalllllllyyyyyy would like to fock but rejected you, or you havent learn the skills that are needed to seduce the girls would reeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaallllllllllllllllllyyyyy like to fock.
thats why we are here for brother, follow the DJ way and youll never be blinded by the power of the p-ussy, someday youll see the light at the end of they vagina."

How do you learn such skills? What is the key? I keep trying to figure it out,but can't put a plan together. How do you not be blinded by it so much?

I mean natural vs not so natural/afc? What's the big difference?

 

[Jitterbug]

There's Pook's Kill That Desperation. It deals with neediness. That's just one out of many in the DJ Bible. I'm surprised that you've been here this long and have never read it (or have read but don't remember it).

 

[Maxtro]

CapedCrusader08,
It is a possibility that you have similar issues that I do. I suggest taking some time and trying to figure out what is screwing you up. Then seek the appropriate resolutions.


Jitterbug,
I know I've read it in the past, though don't know how many years ago it was. I will reread it, thank you. Hell I should reread the entire DJ bible every 6 months that I keep posting on here. Honestly though there is such a thing as information overload. I don't have the time to read about things that may not be applicable. Shit I even need to make sure I don't flunk out of college this year.

Edit: It was an interesting read and would have described me perfectly ~1-2 years ago. If she would have known me then, she would have quickly run off from my constant bugging.

I'm actually kind of surprised that none of the signs Pook said

-always giving the women attention.
-calling all the time (and calling immediately once getting the number, immediately returning a call, etc.)
-taking every opportunity to talk to them (and telling everything about yourself)
-always available.
-NEVER willing to walk away (NEVER willing to disagree, ALWAYS supplicating).

actually applied to my interactions with her at all. It does make me feel good that I had learned some things from this board (no matter how small) and used them in my interactions with women.

Thinking that you are "the great catch" is actually a different thought and one that I do need to work on.

As long as I continue to learn, there is hope.

 

[librito]

capecrusader08.............it is not enough to read because the only way to learn is by applying it in the field.
you need to get out and get rejected at least 3 times a week by different women. while you do this you will also succeed and will get girls numbers. once you start getting girls number's then you will not appear to be desperate anymore because your confidence will grow and youll find out that the major reason you was not getting laid before was because you was cuckblocking yourself with your neediness and desperation.