MDgood
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Jan 14, 2003
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There's been a lot of talk back and forth about what constitutes an HB 8, HB 9, HB 10, etc. However, the inherent problem with this is that a man's opinion of beauty is subjective, and the HB scale is an attempt to be objective about beauty: We are trying to place an absolute value on the beauty of a woman as if it's attached to a tag on their backs, when in fact beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Our rating system is, therefore, greatly skewed and bound to cause catastrophic confusion and resultant political revolution.
Therefore, gentlemen, allow me to introduce to you a rating system that was used to great effect when I was in high school and college. It is a subjective rating scale, taking into account a man's singular feeling of desire in of a woman. In other words, it allows men to rate woman based on the amount of desire she makes them feel. In doing so, all subjective preferences that all men feel towards a woman based on her age, her hair color, body type, eyes, personality, etc., are therefore cancelled out, leaving nothing but a raw, true, relative measure. Gentlemen, I give to you:
The Clydesdale Factor.
Yes, the Clydesdale Factor is representative of the number of large team horses it would take to pull a woman off your face. Therefore, one man's CF 2 woman is equal to another man's CF 2 woman: regardless of the individual woman's appearance or personality, it would take two Clydesdales to drag each woman off of the respective man's face, because that's the level of desire that each man feels.
Allow me to give a graphic explanation, using two scenarios:
In scenario #1, you have Denise Richards sitting on your face. Most men would feel a large amount of sexual desire for this woman. In walks a man with a harness with which he proceeds to schackle up Ms. Richards to a Clydesdale. You are so filled with desire to keep her on your face, the first Clydesdale wears out trying to pull against you. A second team horse must be attached. Still no luck, both horses wear out. Three horses. Four. Five. Six horses won't do it. But 7... yes, the force you need employ to keep Denise Richards on your face is not worth the effort of fighting against 7 team horses, and you let go. Therefore, Ms. Richards is one man's CF 7.
In scenario #2, you meet a girl you know from 7th grade, Annie Johnson, in a bar. It's 20 years later, and Ms. Johnson is now a bit frumpled. However, when you were 12 years old Annie was one hot perky number, and you spent more time spanking your newfound monkey while thinking of her that right now the thought of finally be able to nail her has given you a boner you haven't seen since that porno in college. Finally, after years of fantasy, it's showtime! Ms. Richards is being dragged down the hall by 7 team horses, and Ms. Johnson assumes the position. The man walks in and harnesses her to a Clydesdale. One team horse can't do it... you're finally getting some, and she ain't going. Two is a no go. Nor three, four, or five. This time it's personal! Six doesn't work, but with the seventh team horse off flys Annie Johnson from your face and down the hall. Annie Johnson is also a CF 7. She may not physically be Denise Richards, but she has caused you an equal amount of desire.
Gentlemen, an internet forum like this, where we'll never see these women of whom the others' speak, is the best place to utilize the Clydesdale factor. Like most inventions born of true brilliance, it will revolutionize the way we discuss women on this forum.
Thank you.
Therefore, gentlemen, allow me to introduce to you a rating system that was used to great effect when I was in high school and college. It is a subjective rating scale, taking into account a man's singular feeling of desire in of a woman. In other words, it allows men to rate woman based on the amount of desire she makes them feel. In doing so, all subjective preferences that all men feel towards a woman based on her age, her hair color, body type, eyes, personality, etc., are therefore cancelled out, leaving nothing but a raw, true, relative measure. Gentlemen, I give to you:
The Clydesdale Factor.
Yes, the Clydesdale Factor is representative of the number of large team horses it would take to pull a woman off your face. Therefore, one man's CF 2 woman is equal to another man's CF 2 woman: regardless of the individual woman's appearance or personality, it would take two Clydesdales to drag each woman off of the respective man's face, because that's the level of desire that each man feels.
Allow me to give a graphic explanation, using two scenarios:
In scenario #1, you have Denise Richards sitting on your face. Most men would feel a large amount of sexual desire for this woman. In walks a man with a harness with which he proceeds to schackle up Ms. Richards to a Clydesdale. You are so filled with desire to keep her on your face, the first Clydesdale wears out trying to pull against you. A second team horse must be attached. Still no luck, both horses wear out. Three horses. Four. Five. Six horses won't do it. But 7... yes, the force you need employ to keep Denise Richards on your face is not worth the effort of fighting against 7 team horses, and you let go. Therefore, Ms. Richards is one man's CF 7.
In scenario #2, you meet a girl you know from 7th grade, Annie Johnson, in a bar. It's 20 years later, and Ms. Johnson is now a bit frumpled. However, when you were 12 years old Annie was one hot perky number, and you spent more time spanking your newfound monkey while thinking of her that right now the thought of finally be able to nail her has given you a boner you haven't seen since that porno in college. Finally, after years of fantasy, it's showtime! Ms. Richards is being dragged down the hall by 7 team horses, and Ms. Johnson assumes the position. The man walks in and harnesses her to a Clydesdale. One team horse can't do it... you're finally getting some, and she ain't going. Two is a no go. Nor three, four, or five. This time it's personal! Six doesn't work, but with the seventh team horse off flys Annie Johnson from your face and down the hall. Annie Johnson is also a CF 7. She may not physically be Denise Richards, but she has caused you an equal amount of desire.
Gentlemen, an internet forum like this, where we'll never see these women of whom the others' speak, is the best place to utilize the Clydesdale factor. Like most inventions born of true brilliance, it will revolutionize the way we discuss women on this forum.
Thank you.
