The best teqnique I ever used that worked.

[mrfinzz]

I read all the tips and feel that I need to contribute to the forum and community somehow. Therefore, I will share the best teqnique that i have ever personally gotten to work.

Now this is really more of a mindset than a technique, and it may not work for everyone. If you are just looking for a one night stand or something quick, than forget about it. But if you have the time, patience, and faith, this WILL work- but you have to hold a certain belief pattern for it to work. for this to work you must believe that :

1)there is a God or divine presence that will be active in your life

2)that there is a "true magic one" that it is possible for you to find (ie, love at first sight or something like it)

3) that you are able to find her if you take action

4)and most important, you MUST stay true to your "inner guidance" or "true self"

Ok so here is what I did. I got to a point in my life (when I was really young actually) where I wanted to fall in love. like REAL love. At this point I began to make an important distinction. I found lots of girls pretty, but was not in "love" with them. If I wanted to find love, real love, than I need to ignore those girls and treat them like I would anyone else-so as not to be distracted from finding "the one". It was then that I began to realize how desperatly those beautiful girls crave attention. It was like they had a sixth sense that could tell that I honestly didn't care what they looked like, if they were beautiful or not, (because they weren't "the one") and very often they would go out of their way to try to get my attention. For some girls it was almost like their vain beauty was the entire bain of their existence, and they were powerless without it.

Anyway, I actually began to attract lots of pretty girls AND women (note the distinction) and for the first time I actually began to know what it was like to be a really attractive person that people would "do stuff" to try to meet, (even though I'm average looking at best). But I didn't care, If it wasn't love, it was just a big waste of time, and I would settle for nothing less...

Evetually I found her. She was a redhead with lots of freckles and and amazing body and sweet spirit. I soon realized that by taking the attitude I had aloowed me ascended to her level. I think everyone who has ever been in love will agree that it's really the like spirits that attract people to each other anyway. She had been around this whole time like the other real hot girls I was blowing off (or whatever) and unlike all the other AFCs that were trying to get at her, I saw past her looks (and like I said, women can tell when you do) and we both eventually got on the same wavelength and fell in love. Looking back I honestly think that I was the only guy she knew who could actually carry on a conversation with her (she was that fine). And when we fell in love, we both knew what was happening.
Everyone around me was like, what the hell? how on earth did he get her? what does he got that I don't? etc.

I think that if you look back on every time you were in love, you realize that it reflected the person you were at that point in your life. there are some girls I loved that there is NO WAY i would even consider now, but they did reflect who I was at that time.

So basically all I'm saying is look past the looks and sex and all that, and if you stay true to your true self (ie,love yourself) and don't fake it, you'll recognize the one when she appears...

Good luck DJ's
Ps. "God is Love" -IJohn 4:8

 

[belividere]

Alright first off I'm not trying to burst your little love bubble here or anything but this fairytale needs to be probed a little.

So you believe that there is only one person for everyone. With over 5 billion people in the world I'm a little skeptical that it was intended to meet a single person that is perfect for you. More likely you learn and the person you are with will learn to compromise and accept the person they are with. That is more likely of how the majority of marriages in the world really are. And what does god have to do with who I wind up with. I am not christian to begin with nor is a large population of the world. I dont believe that if their is a god that he is spending his time choosing the mates of every person on earth. Sorry just an opinion I'm sure that you will come back with a bible verse to offset it.

You state that when you "were really young" you wanted to find love. What has changed since then? It appears that your rejection of women who are interested despite their physical appearance was an effort to hold off for a "true love". How do you know that they wanted you to begin with? What were you doing to fight them off? what separates girls from women (note the distinction)? How do you know love? You spent so much time turning down women who "wanted you" how do you really say that you can know what love feels like?

So for this girl, what puts her at such a special level? How did you ascend to it as if you needed some type of transcendal powers to achieve the level of being that she naturally assumed. So you went passed her looks and involved her inner being on an emotional level that the AFC guys couldn't? What attracted you in the first place her personality or her looks? What attracted the AFC guys? How can women see when a guy is into her only for her looks? I've been in "love" a few times in my life. Each time the initial attraction to the girl was based on looks. Whether you want to accept that looks are a big deal or not is your call. In all reality I'm not about to spend the rest of my life or even get into an LTR with a girl who isn't attractive. it seems to me that you are also caught up in looks as well based on the "how the hell did he get her" comments. That isn't wrong only natural. I would suggest reading up on ego I know a lot of posts have been written on here regarding the subject.

As for the self-reflection regarding the times that you were in love, were these girls in love with you as well? Was this love one-sided? To much of this post seems to contradict itself. With the love yourself and look past attraction when you say you found the girl that you were so attracted to. I cant knock the love yourself mentality but i think that the whole mentality should be based on loving the "true" self not the self that is generated in your own mind. Now you might be a great guy and a good catch I am not knocking that but what makes you so sure that you are in a relationship with her "true" self. I have been in that spot before where everything in my life was as wanted and the girl I thought I was with ended up being a little different then what I expected. So as a word of warning dont get to deep and hurt yourself on a personal level over this. I know you are in "love" but the ugly side of people can emerge once they are comfortable.

 

[mrfinzz]

well 1st of all

1)I didn't say anything about being a Christian to do this, and I wasn't one when I met her

2)I didn't say there would only be one girl for your whole life, just that there was one for the stage of life I was in at that time

3)If you can't "note the distinction" between girls and women, I don't know what to tell you

4)Of course looks were important, but like buying a car you have to be willing to look farther than that, or you'll be in big trouble

5)Just take it easy and take it for what it's worth.....

 

[Dimebag_Darrell]

I can relate to you man. Aint nothing wrong with finding the perfect one. Or the seemingly perfect one , especially if you ARE looking beyond looks like you say you are because it weeds out a lot of women in your path for that girl that clicks.

 

[Krassus]

Originally posted by mrfinzz
At this point I began to make an important distinction. I found lots of girls pretty, but was not in "love" with them. If I wanted to find love, real love, than I need to ignore those girls and treat them like I would anyone else-so as not to be distracted from finding "the one". It was then that I began to realize how desperatly those beautiful girls crave attention. It was like they had a sixth sense that could tell that I honestly didn't care what they looked like, if they were beautiful or not, (because they weren't "the one") and very often they would go out of their way to try to get my attention.

This is very good. It's very important to have high standards and that's exactly the point of this post. If you're gonna drool over every pretty face that comes along, you'll never get any. I've actually written a lengthy article about the importance of mentally picturing your perfect girlfriend, so that you'd have a benchmark to measure all other women up against. Because your mental image is perfect, no other women would be quite as good, and because of your belief that you can do better, you'd be able to get them quite easily. I'm actually gonna re-read my article and write down this description, then memorize it. This one of the biggest realizations i've made during my journey, and i'm happy to have been reminded of it, as i've almost forgotten it.