"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Texting Tips

Fumbduck

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Hi Guys...

Text messaging has become the norm for communication with people my age. (Early-Mid 20's.) I'm good with it, keeping it light, funny, flirty, and c/f when I get a setup in the conversation. I feel you can loose some IL if you text too much, or text too little. Curious about how others do it...

How do you guys text women, JUST when you have a reason? Do you text to just say "whats up"? How do you guys maintain/escalate IL through text messages between dates?
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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SoSuaveDude

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I'm also interested in the feedback you'll receive, but why do you think texting to little can decrease IL?
 

handle

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I disagree with the "too little" bit. When people text me about something important I just call them. I ignore about half of the "just chatting" texts I receive. Girls get the idea pretty quickly -- I'm not into the back-and-forth chat thing. And they generally are fine with it.
 

Yachtie

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This is with LTR in mind. I'm not an expert here, but I've had success with not getting into a routine or schedule with communicating. Sometimes BBM, sometimes gchat, sometimes call (20 min max), and sometimes no contact periods for 2-3 days. If her IL is up and I haven't annoyed her, she'll either re-connect at the end of the no contact period or answer me right away. I won't always respond in kind; e.g., she'll bbm so I'll wait and call later. I find that no contact can be effective at different times -- ups or downs in the relationship. All communications are at random and with a brief purposeful message, not just bs'ing (if I can avoid it). I think people here will tell you that the point is to be somewhat mysterious at times, not too available or needy, and to convey what you would in person: i.e., challenge, aloofness, insouciance with occasional indications of interest, ****y & funny, confidence, insinuations of romance and passion, etc. I try to end the chat before she does, and because I actually have something to do and not just waiting until the next opportunity to be with her in person. And if that's not the truth, what she doesn't know won't hurt her. She's jumping on my life train (among other things).

To help stop myself from texting/bbm'ing/calling too often, I put ###STOP### in the title field of her contact file in my Blackberry. It has helped me stop from getting too excited to contact her or respond too quickly, too often. I'll admit, though I have more than just this one plate, I'm a bit smitten at the moment.

It's worked for me so far, and I've only recently discovered this, but it's thanks to this site. You may experience different results. Good luck men.
 

Blackgame

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I text alot, some times I find myself having to cut back on my texting. cause it can become hindering running out of things to say is always a bad thing. try to stay away from running "game" on the phone or in texts, keep it light, ****y funny jokes, flirting, and but keep the good stuff for face to face encounters

remember you cant get head through the phone
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Iceberg

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Fumbduck said:
Do you text to just say "whats up"? How do you guys maintain/escalate IL through text messages between dates?
Never.

I text to say "what's up" and attach that to "let's get a drink". I hate that back and forth text crap. Smiley faces and sh**. Just speak your piece and move on. That's my suggestion.
 

SeymourCake

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But I was watching The Boondocks the other day and a character on there said *****es love smiley faces.
 

Fumbduck

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Using or not using smiles is not the direction I want this thread to go. There is another post that goes into great lengths on that...

Frequency and type of conversation is what I'm interested in. To answer your question I feel that txting too much can put you on the fast track to the friend zone because you begin to reveal much information about yourself and loose mystery. If you text too infrequently, I feel the girl may loose interest because she's not able to connect with you between dates. I know there is a happy medium. I've made the mistake of txting too frequently recently and feel that ruined my chances with one plate.

Girls love to text, its another part of the game to master.

SoSuaveDude said:
I'm also interested in the feedback you'll receive, but why do you think texting to little can decrease IL?
 

ENIGMA16

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****ing epic, thanks horaholic. My phone game is terrible so I'm thinking about switching it up to text only which I have a lot more experience with and is way easier IMO.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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