Texting is KILLING Your Chances With Her

[youngmack]

We need a thread on text game asap

 

[MisterD]

We need a thread on text game asap

I'm seriously considering making one

 

[Jay Dee]

We need a thread on text game asap

I'm seriously considering making one

Chaps just search instead, plenty out there.

I too agree - but peeps keep forgetting what this is all about. The aim should be to get the beeetch to meet with you so you can bed it, use the electronics in the best possible way to make this happen. Now to give credit to every man on here, I can't think of any chap who's been recently speaking to a gal in some way, who isn't hoping to meet it and pump away at some point.

The prob is that too many take too long to arrange this because they think doing small talk keeps them sweet. The gal just thinks you are being friendly = friend = friendzone, girls don't make good friends, look at how they treat each other! The opposite is what works much better - keep the talk to a minimum (couple of texts or a single call so less chance to say crap) and then aim for the meet instead.

Advanced techniques are that it doesn't actually matter how often you talk/text with her, but she has to be emotionally engaged regularly and you gotta know what you're doing, in preferential order of person, phone, text.

 

[Packers2010]

I agree with Harry that some dudes on here text too much. There's no need to be electronically attached to a girl 24/7.

But I definitely have shifted to texting more than calling. It's just easier. A phone call requires more out of me than a text. And rarely am I ever in the mood after work to dedicate 10, 15, 20 minutes to a phone call.

But yeah. Far too many guys in the world texting girls like:

Guy: What ru up to?
Girl: Watching American Idol.
Guy: Cool. I'm watching football.

It's like this - say something interesting/funny and QUICK. Then, go away. Better to be amusing and then disappear than to have these long, drawn out, go-nowhere text talks. Like an old married couple.

Best to think of it this way - text is for quick conversation. Whether it's sharing a funny story about your day or a date request. Say it. Get it done. Go do something else. These women are not your mothers...they don't want you attached to them all day like an umbilical cord.

this is why iceberg gives me a broner.. his posts are full of win.


my question is: how do you not text so much, but still keep her interested? i've had girls not remember me 3 days later when i randomly texted them

i thought about it and come up with the answer that: it's all about the interest level when getting the number. if it's high, she will remember you, if it's low she won't do you think that is the case?

 

[Harry Wilmington]

There's a lot of responses on here to my original posting. Alot of them are similar, so rather than answer each one individually, I'll highlight various general responses and give my response.

GENERAL RESPONSE #1: "But I text all the time, or know someone who texts all the time, and I/they get girls nonstop!"

MY RESPONSE: This is only a half-truth. In actuality, based upon the remaining context of people making these statements, they are using texts as they should be used: namely, to get the girl to see you. This usually means having to either (a) send a few flirty text before asking her out, or (b) going over the details of a meet-up.

Beyond that, though, what I expressed in my post was the fact that, outside of these context, texting kills your chances with a girl. If you set up a date with a girl via text, there's really no point in continuing to communicate with her UNTIL YOU ACTUALLY MEET UP WITH HER. The point of all this texting/calling/phoning/whatevering is to ACTUALLY MEET UP WITH HER.

Texting a girl all the time - especially one you've just met - is just as bad as if you two were to spend 5 to 6 hours a day together, everyday. Again, when you first meet a girl she shouldn't have that much access to you. She should be wondering what you're doing, who you're doing it with and WHY you're not contacting her. This is the "mystery" part that helps her build up attraction to you, which gets deaded the more you text her.

GENERAL RESPONSE #2: "You can game a girl the right way through text if you know what you're doing..."

MY RESPONSE: ...which is very true. However, consistently texting her just to text her is NOT the way to do it.

Again, texting should be seen as a tool, used to get the woman to meet up with you. The guys who are "gaming" these girls through text are doing one of two things:

(a) hitting the girl up with the right words necessary to get her interested, then closing the deal so they can - say it with me now - MEET UP WITH HER; or

(b) waiting for the girl to text them first (which shows she's interested in seeing the guy), then quickly going into a close that will allow him to... well, you get the idea.

In other words, YES, you can game a girl through text; however, the idea isn't to become some kind of chatty Cathy with it. Again, the less she hears from you when you're NOT around, the better chance you have of setting up an actual meeting with her when you DO text her.

Lastly, Packers2010 asked an interesting question:

How do you not text so much, but still keep her interested? i've had girls not remember me 3 days later when i randomly texted them. i thought about it and come up with the answer that: it's all about the interest level when getting the number. if it's high, she will remember you, if it's low she won't do you think that is the case?

In short: if they really, REALLY like you, they'll be happy whenever you contact them, and they WILL remember you. I've had girls whose numbers I've gotten and waited 2 weeks to contact them (during my "spinning plates" phase where I was dating enough girls at one time to where I'd legitimately forget to call one of the newer girls right away) and they were saying my name as soon as they picked up. Know why? 'Cause they had my number saved, along with my name.

Don't let girls BS you into thinking they can't remember a name if you don't call them right away. If you were one of their favorite movie stars and you gave them the number, I'm sure they'd remember who you were if you called and said "Yeah, my name's Brad... Brad Pitt. Remember me? We met at the park the other day..." Plus, how many girls' names have YOU forgotten if they didn't send you a text for 4 or 5 days?

As for keeping their interest: dude, I'm telling you, if they like you, THEY will do all the work. Get a girl's number and try not calling/texting her for even 2 days (I wait 4, but if you're nervous start with 2). All she'll do during that time is think about you, wonder when you're going to call, and start fantasizing about what you two will talk about when you DO finally contact her.

You're actually helping yourself out more with a girl if you DON'T hit her up right away. (Again, this is for girls you just met - if they're already your girlfriend or have been in the loop for a while... well, it still works, but much better on newbies, especially the HBs.) And when you DO finally call or send a text, do it to set up a date, then NC her until the date. Pretty simple stuff!

 

[jacobogbeide]

amen to this

 

[Burroughs]

Texting these days is a prime form of communication. Most girls, hell, most people do it now. I'm sure back in the early 1990's guys were b1itching about telegraphing a woman instead of writing her a letter or some ****. I try to stay with the times.
If you swear off of it that's your thing, but I find that a lot of girls might prefer to text rather than talk on the phone for hours. I know sometimes I'd rather not stop everything i'm doing in order to invest myself into a conversation over the phone while I can get stuff done and talk to them without missing a beat. Texting them instead has not killed any attraction what so ever.

I think chicks will look at you like a caveman if you don't text these days.

worrying about petty BS is killing your chances with her, not texting

This man speaks truth

most of you are not alphas nor will you ever be perceived that way by any woman ever.....your best bet is to text early and often then slip a meet up date in asap...then go for the fvck session.

for 90% of guys this is the way you have to roll.

no girl is ever going to dream of you. you are not rich or handsome. you are not fantasy material so if you act like one...girls will not respond to the dischord....

girls are texting every 5 minutes....you've never seen a hot girl at the mall not looking at her phone...you need to get in that rotation.

simple truth

 

[Dominance]

Nothing wrong with texting, i've got many girls doing it.

BUT I agree not to send millions of them and send that other bs to her "oh why aren't you responding".

That's the difference, no problem with texting to get a date.

 

[Aristippus]

Let's assume for a minute that Harry's advice is especially geared towards men who actually need the advice. I'd say he's 100% correct to give this advice. I'm personally a firm believer that the more personal your communication is, the better. Text messaging might be alright for someone you already know very well.

But to actually connect with someone, no one here can honestly say that texting is a substitute for either hearing a person's voice or actually seeing them face to face. That's just a fact. Saying that text messages are just as good is like saying talking dirty on the internet is the same as having sex.

I'm not a big fan of text messaging myself. And I don't think you can really connect with a person the same as when they hear your voice on the phone. Some guys on here may use text messages as their only means of communication to set up dates, with success, but there are also human beings that have 4 fingers or 6 toes. They're the exception and not the rule.

I think as a general rule, and for the men on here that need a good general guideline, you're better off to avoid text messages as much as possible and to give her a call. Talk to her so you can hear each other's voices and then meet in person as soon as possible. Case closed. (Oh, wait, I stole Judge Nismo's line.)

 

[NobodyCares1]

I do both, texting and calling, depends if I'm at school during a class I can't call so I text, but after school I call because it's faster.

Anyway sometimes texting isn't as bad, I texted almost every day for an hour with this girl and she was into me a lot. So it also depends on the person, right now I use it only for setting up a date, though the girl I am seeing now was complaining that I never text her on FB.

 

[BeDJ]

Initial contact I use text.

Hey Stupid, this is Stinky. [something funny about you or her]

Ignore whatever she says and then call her later in the day or the next.

 

[zekko]

And I don't think you can really connect with a person the same as when they hear your voice on the phone.

All hearing a voice on the phone is going to do for me is annoy me. I hate telephones.

If you don't like texting, then don't text. And I suppose if you are inexperienced or uncalibrated texting can have some pitfalls. But honestly, such people are just as likely to mess up the interaction in person. For myself, I find that I can communicate my personality by text just as well as I do in person. And I'm only an average looking guy, so I find my personality is what attracts women.

Once I had a girl text me by accident, a wrong number. I was bored at the time, so I started messing with her a bit, and shortly thereafter she was wanting me to come to her house. So obviously you can make a connection by text if you know what you're doing.

 

[Aristippus]

Zekko said:
"If you don't like texting, then don't text. And I suppose if you are inexperienced or uncalibrated texting can have some pitfalls. But honestly, such people are just as likely to mess up the interaction in person."

An inexperienced person needs to gain experience interacting with women. I think also, guys without experience might use the technology barrier as a buffer or a crutch. You're experienced and you also hate telephones and talking on the phone. Since you're experienced, you can afford to bypass a good general rule. But if someone inexperience said he hates talking on the phone, I'd tell him to get over it and get used to talking to women on the phone to gain experience, to connect better with women, and to get over his nerves.

 

[zekko]

An inexperienced person needs to gain experience interacting with women. I think also, guys without experience might use the technology barrier as a buffer or a crutch. You're experienced and you also hate telephones and talking on the phone. Since you're experienced, you can afford to bypass a good general rule. But if someone inexperience said he hates talking on the phone, I'd tell him to get over it and get used to talking to women on the phone to gain experience, to connect better with women, and to get over his nerves.

Good point, I'd tend to agree.
Although you might argue telephones are technology too.
In any case, of course it's always better to have face to face interactions.

I tend to speak out against the "don't text" rule though, since I've seen guys do some amazing things using text game.

 

[Renegade357]

Hah, deploy text game on the looser women if you're looking for that quick lay.

However if you're trying to make her your girlfriend text as little as possible. The more you text the more you kill challenge it's as simple as that. It's one of the favorite little tools they like to use to weed you out as quickly as possible.

 

[handle]

Many years ago I would say texting is a bad idea, but now it's just another method of communication.

 

[DonGorgon]

text... call... its all the same.. if she likes you she will F you fro a while then over time she will loose interest and move on to the next guy..

 

[Renegade357]

Well you better be good at it if you're going to do it. Remember she also has 5 other AFCs hustling her via text. Not real sure how you stand out from them if you're playing her game but good luck to you haha.

 

[vatoloco]

Texting is like handling grenades...

 

[Harry Wilmington]

LoL, very, very true indeed!