Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Texting: A view from the other side

HalfPUAHalfAFC

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We've seen posts where guys report what it is like to either get tons of attention from women they are not interested in (or only partially) and/or posts where guys talk about sarging for chicks at a gay club and experience tons of unwanted attention (from guys this time).

By the same token, we've seen TONS of posts from guys on here trying to navigate text game, often doing very poorly at it. "Why isn't she answering?" "Where did I go wrong here?"

At which point we expect Harry Wilmington to chime in, "Texting KILLS relationships!"

Well, he has a point. I have two women (one a plate, one an ex I bang a few times a year.... usually against my better judgement, but that's another story) that text me a few times a day. The plate is relatively new but both she and the ex send stupid, mundane, ridiculous messages regularly.

It's like they are saying in between the lines, "Don't forget about me!!!"

I'm sitting here doing my work and "BING!!" Another BS text. Few minutes later, "BING!" Not again....ugh.

My desire to text back and bang them a few days down the line drop with each stupid, useless, mundane text I get. I ignore them and they don't get the message and KEEP FREAKING DOING IT. I've even told the ex to stop it and she does for a while but give it a month and she's back. I haven't yet dressed down the new plate because I still want a few bangs out of her (not LTR material) but its getting tiresome. Clueless.

Now, imagine that HB7-8-9-10 you are chasing.

How many guys do you think she's getting texts from everyday? How often do you think she's growing exhausted answering texts from guys she has only 50% interest in (give or take). How many have you sent her today? This week? Were they mundane, stupid, boring, bad-game texts? More likely than not... And you are not the only one. So, each stupid, needy, boring, mundane text you send her, the more you get slotted in with those guys who are also chasing her like hungry puppies.

Because if your texts were awesome texts, would you be here wondering why she's not answering? No, you'd have already met her and closed the deal.

Imagine yourself being inundated with texts from chicks you only have partial interests in... would you grow frustrated? Sense neediness? Lose some attraction to her? How long would you pull the trigger and write her off? Remember, women who have more options will write you off sooner than the typical guy will write a woman off.

Ask yourself these questions before you send that next text and before you post here wondering what went wrong......
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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HalfPUAHalfAFC

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PairPlusRoyalFlush said:
The analogy is different with women though because women generally initiate the texts, while hypocritically viewing you as "too available" merely because you respond
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PairPlusRoyalFlush, though I generally agree with you, I am not sure it addresses my point.

First, I meant this as a warning to guys who text too much and wonder what happened. If they were on the other end--two, three, four women texting them several times a day with BS chit-chat--they'd understand why their texts are failing in their goals with women.

Second, and this extends from your point though, if a guy is always texting first, then he's setting himself up for getting ignored as the AFC he is.

Third, because it is predictable that hot chicks probably have several guys texting them, very few guys have good text game and most stink at it, so when a guy texts a girl a lot, he easily gets slotted in with other chodes on her phone.

Unless your text game is TOP NOTCH (mine is not), then you should really use it as little as possible. WAY too many downsides and landmines to deal with. Further, almost EVERY guy texts that hot chick he meets, so be different.

And, if you text more than sparingly, she KNOWS you are chasing and thus the power balance is on her side.
 
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