"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Texting a girl for the first time

Digidako

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What's going on everyone ? This is my first of many posts- I've been lurking for quite some time now. Long story short, I met this dime yesterday, chatted her up and scored her number. It was pretty late at night and we both have super early classes today. I decided I should probably hold off on texting her at 11:30pm, just for the simple fact that I wanted to keep a nice convo going for a while. My question is, how should I approach texting her for the first couple days ? We're both university students, she's a year older than I-but we seemed to hit it off last night and there's definitely something to work with. Any input is appreciated. Cheers.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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TheException

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Digidako said:
I wanted to keep a nice convo going for a while.
Dont do this^

University game is fun as he11 and very easy. There are literally thousands of smoking broads in one small confined area and this situation allows you best to develop that "abundance mentality".

With this specific situation.....id wait a few days then text her something like "Hey *name*. Then say something funny that happened during your conversation".

You will then practically ignore her answer and send this text "What days are you free next week?"

When she responds you pick one of the days and say "Cool. Lets go to yxz at 8pm on thursday. Ive been fiending for a good burger".

And be done with it....texting is not for having "nice long conversations". Its for setting up hangouts so you can have those conversations in person. If she responds lukewarm....just back off a bit and text her in a few days. Its all a numbers game....dont waste your time on half interested women.
 

SmooveMooves

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First wait a day or two.

Then, you have two ways of of going about it. Simply say shoot a text saying:

"Hey its______ From the other night"

Or

You can use an anchor. Say you were talking about an ugly sweater she was wearing during the interaction. An anchor would be opening with "Hey, still got that ugly sweater?" or something of the sort. An anchor is used to remind the female of the high energy that was present during an interaction, in each interaction I try to drop these anchors so when I finally do contact I stand out from her endless options.

Then small talk and bs should follow suit lead up to you setting up a meetup a day or three advance, No More.


Don't set up dates weeks in advance, flake chances skyrocket.

Just my input.
 

VladPatton

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Yep, the guys above are right. Find a commonality, or just jump in with a re-introduction followed by an idea

"Hi it's Digidako, I've had a long day, wanna join me for a beer?"

It doesn't matter if she says no, in the event she can't, you then come in with "cool, what days are you free then?". Either way you'll know what's up. If she destroys you twice, she isn't interested and you delete her.

Basically: hi, let's do this, if not, when?

Forget the long convos, that's for chumps who are afraid to find out a bad outcome. You don't wanna end up her orbiter, so if she doesn't wanna chill with you you don't waste time pursuing in vain.

Keep us posted.
 

nemz

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Solid advice above, don't start text chatting just get the date down...
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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gravityeyelids

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In the future i would advise texting her while she's standing right there. If you get her number, immediately text her something so she can save the number. If i can't think of anything clever i'll just text "hey dork" or "hey loser"

you can follow up with something like "who's that hot guy you're talking to?" and create this conspiracy type thing between you two. it also gets her used to texting you so there's not this big "first time i text her" thing.

But yea, as the other posters have said, followup humor connection to something in your conversation is crucial. You dont want to be the boring guy that goes "Hey" "What's up" "oh not too much, just working on homework, hbu?" "That's cool", etc.

And as i've learned, keep the texting to a minimum. You can play around for a few texts, be a little flirty, but as soon as possible, push for the meetup. You should not be texting this girl for weeks without pushing for a meetup.
 

Digidako

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Great advice, I'll shoot her a text tomorrow and set something up. I'll keep all posted.
 

Harry Wilmington

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You really wanna stand out from the hundreds of other guys who she's given her number to? Do NOT - I repeat, do NOT - get into the habit of texting her as your sole form of communication. Give her a CALL, keep the convo short, and ask for the DATE.

Do not believe this myth going around that you have to have constant chat contact with a girl to "build up her interest." You do not. All you need to do is get her on the DATE. Save the majority of your conversation, flirtation, stories, discoveries about her, etc. for when you have her IN PERSON on an actual DATE.

And I can already hear the parade coming: "But it's 2014, everybody texts now, girls prefer it!!" These people are LYING to you. Reality check: 99 guys are texting her or FB messaging her, and she's not dating a single ONE of them, partially because they don't stand out. Texting is something you can practically do with your eyes closed, and just 'cause she's texting you back doesn't mean she's reacting to your conversation the way you think she is ("Oh, she sent a smiley face, she must have liked my joke!" Not always the case, brah...)

BUT...

If you call her, at least you can hear her voice and determine if she SOUNDS excited to see you. So yeah, call her up and ask her out.
 

rascal99v

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Harry Wilmington said:
You really wanna stand out from the hundreds of other guys who she's given her number to? Do NOT - I repeat, do NOT - get into the habit of texting her as your sole form of communication. Give her a CALL, keep the convo short, and ask for the DATE.

Do not believe this myth going around that you have to have constant chat contact with a girl to "build up her interest." You do not. All you need to do is get her on the DATE. Save the majority of your conversation, flirtation, stories, discoveries about her, etc. for when you have her IN PERSON on an actual DATE.

And I can already hear the parade coming: "But it's 2014, everybody texts now, girls prefer it!!" These people are LYING to you. Reality check: 99 guys are texting her or FB messaging her, and she's not dating a single ONE of them, partially because they don't stand out. Texting is something you can practically do with your eyes closed, and just 'cause she's texting you back doesn't mean she's reacting to your conversation the way you think she is ("Oh, she sent a smiley face, she must have liked my joke!" Not always the case, brah...)

BUT...

If you call her, at least you can hear her voice and determine if she SOUNDS excited to see you. So yeah, call her up and ask her out.
More of the same mythical nonsense from Harry Wilmington.


It all comes down to interest. When a chick has zero interest, then calling her up or asking for a date won't matter. She won't be interested in talking or going out on a date with you.

Chicks who have interest will show interest in no matter what method you use. So, when you text she will be excited you texted. When you see she has interest, you call her up and ask her out. You can game her through text right into your bed if you know what you're doing.

Harry's advice is from 1984 when we had no technological advances. Not using the technology we have today will make you a man of limitations. Men with limitations always fail with women. :yes:

What Harry and company don't seem to understand is that you aren't going to raise her interest any higher by only calling. The chick is going to have the same interest no matter what. Calling her up on the phone isn't going to make her panties wet if she doesn't have any interest.

How are you going to hear if she sounds excited when she doesn't give a sh1t to answer your call?

That's why texting or calling doesn't make any difference. If she has low IL via text, she is going to have low IL via a phone call. Why is this so hard for you guys to understand?
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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