"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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"Text/Message me on the day to remind me"

Firefly

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I have been getting this response quite a bit recently from young women with whom I have been making appointments, both in dating situations and non-dating situations. Just wanted to get opinions on:

1. What does this mean? I assume it means low interest and a desire to keep one's options open, but it seems odd that I get such a response even from women in non-dating situations (i.e I recently offered to show a group of newly arrived overseas students from my uni around the city, and I got this response from the female student who I am in contact with).

2. What is the best response to this? My response to the most recent examples of this was to text back "Here is your reminder. Don't forget to check it on (the day) ;)"
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Scars

Master Don Juan
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Sh!t test.

CALL her up that day and say "See you soon."

-Scars
 

Diaforetikos

Senior Don Juan
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When I hear this, I literally tell them, "Hell no. If you wanna go out, then let's go out." Why bullshjt? If she really wants to go out, she'll remember.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Jariel

Master Don Juan
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For one, they probably want to confirm you will be there and not stand them up, and secondly, they're probably just playing it cool, not wanting to seem too eager (it's not just DJs who play cool).

I read a similar thread in the Mature Man forum and I really don't understand why guys get so defensive about this. I confirm all of my dates on the day or the night before.

Besides, if it is low interest, surely it's better to find out by text than to just go ahead and turn up and find yourself alone.
 

mahoney

Senior Don Juan
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never really had this, but i would have no problem with this at all!

as is said above its a mixture of

1) making sure YOU are going to show
2) making it look like they aren't too eager
 

BlackMack177

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Jariel said:
For one, they probably want to confirm you will be there and not stand them up, and secondly, they're probably just playing it cool, not wanting to seem too eager (it's not just DJs who play cool).

I read a similar thread in the Mature Man forum and I really don't understand why guys get so defensive about this. I confirm all of my dates on the day or the night before.

Besides, if it is low interest, surely it's better to find out by text than to just go ahead and turn up and find yourself alone.
Guys get all defensive because a girl is supposed to through her life away if she likes you. don't you read anything in the DJ bible?:rolleyes:

Dudes forget that people (including girls) have lives and just because you're that super cool dude that asked her out doesn't mean she might not have to work you in on a schedule where she can
 

bigneil

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It's the modern day equivalent of "Call to confirm the night before". Which is normal.
 

OMGWTFLMAO

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I ask people to send me reminders for things all the time. I can't speak for why others might ask, but I do it because I like to be reminded just in case I forget or lose track of time. I don't usually forget but I'm always worried that I will, so I almost always ask people to remind me, especially if I set something up and don't have a way to write it down. It doesn't necessarily mean she's not interested. She might just be someone who worries that if she doesn't have that reminder that she might forget or be late or something.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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