Tell My Pledge Brothers Im a Virgin?

[FutureSpartan]

Im 20, still a virgin.

Always f*cked it up by being too damn eager and desperate when I had the chance.

I got two girls Im hangin out with and more on the way hopefully. But its back to the basics. Get them comfortable first before attracting them, even if it takes a couple dates. Playing the patience game will hopefully pay off.

So Pledge Meetings are every Sunday for my fraternity. We have a little "roast" session where a pledge goes to the middle and guys start askin questions.

All sex related sh*t, of course. So I am worried telling all my pledge brothers Im a virgin. If I say Im not, I better come up with some stories.

I don't know what to do. On one hand, whatever is said is kept secret and these guys are my future brothers. On the other hand, I fear later ****blocking at parties and social events. I could just imagine one of them being mad drunk and walking up to me and some girl and being like "HEY THIS GUY'S STILL A VIRGIN!" and totally blow it.

Then there's that respect issue. I am getting a lot of respect from the guys, and a lot of them look up to me. I wonder what may happen if they find out I've never f*cked a girl (even though I have gotten painfully close, Im making effort!)

I know this may seem dumb, but I just don't know how I should handle this? Be honest? Lie?

 

[L777]

What you should do is realise what a set of tossers frat boys are....and that most of the stories they come up with will be BS, then, quit the frat, then learn to become a cool person and a good PUA.

Or kill yourself.

 

[Berlex]

no! http://youtube.com/watch?v=WoW88FEB2OU

 

[comic_relief]

frats are friggen retarded. I had a lot of offers to join frats, but I would never want to do it because of the degradatation that they create of the male and female.

Let's build you up and then crash you down. Why not pay to have friends because that is what you are actually doing. Make your own friends.

One frat on my campus, takes girls from a sororiety and makes them strip down so the guys in the frat can point out every little imperfection that they have, then each guy chooses a girl and sleeps with her.

Yeah, thats real cool. Wow... I wish that I could do that. Oh yeah, NOT!!! Fvcken losers!

comic_relief

 

[Berlex]

One frat on my campus, takes girls from a sororiety and makes them strip down so the guys in the frat can point out every little imperfection that they have, then each guy chooses a girl and sleeps with her.
comic_relief

hmmm...what campus is this?

 

[Obsidian]

20 years old and still a virgin...oh the horror

Who gives a f*ck what they think. At least you don't have STDs like they probably do. Keep on improving yourself, and don't judge yourself based on others' opinions.

 

[DJVladdy]

Yea tell them. They'll understand, nothing lethal about being a virgin

 

[gimmeyofonenumba]

You will get some poon in a frat though. My buddy is in one and his car was parked right outside but needed a jump start, its like 1am, and im helping him out and like 3 or 4 different sirority girls individually started talking to us, asking what we were doing, talking about sex, asking if we wanted to party.

But that kinda pvssy wont help your game very much. IF it was me personally id tell them im a virgin, if you feel comfortable and confident about it, if your gonna say it and act all dumb and sh1t then just make up some stories.

 

[zerocelcius]

Im 20, still a virgin.

I got two girls Im hangin out with and more on the way hopefully. But its back to the basics. Get them comfortable first before attracting them, even if it takes a couple dates. Playing the patience game will hopefully pay off.
...

All sex related sh*t, of course. So I am worried telling all my pledge brothers Im a virgin. If I say Im not, I better come up with some stories.

1. Comfort is after attraction. It should take a couple dates. If it happens before that than it was just an easy lay. Or you were a Try Hard. Either way it is not DON. If getting some skin is what you want than Game On, but if you are trying to use skill with these girls and do it right than control it and spend the time in the comfort zone. Don't wait too long either!

2. Never make it up. Be proud of who you are and if they or anybody doesn't like it tell them to F#$K Off! What do you want to be a Virgin who is Proud or a Virgin who lies? :nono:


2cents

 

[PhilippeUrielAmancio]

Im 20, still a virgin.

Always f*cked it up by being too damn eager and desperate when I had the chance.

I got two girls Im hangin out with and more on the way hopefully. But its back to the basics. Get them comfortable first before attracting them, even if it takes a couple dates. Playing the patience game will hopefully pay off.

So Pledge Meetings are every Sunday for my fraternity. We have a little "roast" session where a pledge goes to the middle and guys start askin questions.

All sex related sh*t, of course. So I am worried telling all my pledge brothers Im a virgin. If I say Im not, I better come up with some stories.

I don't know what to do. On one hand, whatever is said is kept secret and these guys are my future brothers. On the other hand, I fear later ****blocking at parties and social events. I could just imagine one of them being mad drunk and walking up to me and some girl and being like "HEY THIS GUY'S STILL A VIRGIN!" and totally blow it.

Then there's that respect issue. I am getting a lot of respect from the guys, and a lot of them look up to me. I wonder what may happen if they find out I've never f*cked a girl (even though I have gotten painfully close, Im making effort!)

I know this may seem dumb, but I just don't know how I should handle this? Be honest? Lie?

There are two things about you that speak volumes:

1.) You care what these douchebags think.

2.) You belong to a frat with these douchebags.

If you truly care about what these guys think, I strongly recommend doing some soul searching for that inner game (and you DO care, otherwise you wouldn't have posted this message on the forum).

And if you're worried about these guys laughing at you, why are you even in the frat to begin with? I've never understood that about fraternities. It always seems to be a bunch of guys leaning on each other for social proof.

But seriously, if you really want to improve yourself, consider leaving the frat in the spring. It's such a false sense of confidence.

 

[SaucyBoy]

You think being a virgin is being weak. You want to have the woman you want, not just any woman. I guarantee you that you can get a woman. What you want is quality.

Maybe you are wondering if you will know what to do when you have a woman getting passionate with you. You might think that you won't know what to do and you will fail. Frankly biology kicks in more than you think it does. Remember that SHE WANTS SEX TOO.

Really if you don't feel you have the experience, read some books. These bozos talk and talk, how do you know it's not bull****? They're just puffing themselves out. Go out and buy some books on pleasuring women. Most can be had in ANY BOOKSTORE. If you're embarrased, order online. It will in fact be a boost to you to walk up to a pretty cashier in the bookstore and purchase a book on cullinlingus without batting an eye. For effect, wink at her.

Read the book. Know that you now know far more than most males. This will shine through and women will want to get to know you.

Cheers

 

[FutureSpartan]

Thanks for the replies.

I don't know whats up with the fraternity hating, though. Right now we are coming up with ideas for community service and fundraising 5,000 dollars.

They don't do any of that humiliating crap you hear about on the news. And we're not allowed to drink during the whole pledge stage.

Well, then again, I have heard of some of our other chapters doing that hazing stuff at other schools, so I guess it just really depends.


But I probably should tell them, its not like im doomed to stay a virgin.
I've practiced approaching random hotties the past two months so I am 100% comfortable in my own skin. I just need to avoid f*cking up by being too eager and needy. d

 

[B4IFURU18?]

A couple things...

First, I don't see why you can't pull off a little white lie in this situation...tell them you've banged a few women. Big deal

Secondly, you could not lie, tell the truth, and act like you don't give a ****. Play it off like you're waiting for marriage or some b.s.

Thirdly, I HIGHLY doubt you'd get blown out if one of your brothers made it known that you're a virgin. In fact, I KNOW the women would respect you A LOT for that, and would be more interested in you. I've had this conversation with women before, and 9 out of 10 regret losing their virginity.

Don't worry about this so much. Go have fun, you're in college.

 

[kingwilliam]

I really don't see any reason for bashing a fraternity...... especially if you haven't actually been part of one. There is always this rediculous idea that you are "buying your friends" and nonsense like that.

I was in a fraternity in college and it something I will never regret. I met about 5 or 6 guys that I became really good friends with. We still hang out all the time and I have been out of college for 6 years. A fraternity is a group of guys who wanna have fun and have a place to hang out. Yeah, sure you pay dues each month, but that is to finance one hell of a good time. Awesome parties, sports, and truly a place to harvest friendships....not to mention so much fvcking pvssy that you can't stand it. If you go out to a bar and somebody fvcks with you, then there are usually 15-20 guys who have your back immediately. It was a great time for me.

I would recommend being honest with your brothers. If its a good fraternity, then everyone will respect your decision to wait.

My opinion

By the way, I was an SAE

 

[aussiegoat55]

Wow, this is tough one. Think to yourself what would a real man do?

If you decide to be honest, you maintain your integrity, everyday you wake up and you can reaffirm to yourself "I am not a fraud." It's going to be a tough road, and it's going to take balls, courage, and bravery but it's the best path, IMO.

If you decide to lie, you conform to the fraternity. "Imitation is suicide." But you do not have to deal with the humiliation.

I would be honest, stand tall and pround with a strong, firm tone of voice, "I'm a virgin". There will be shock and laughter, but if you emulate a aura of strength, humbelness, and confidence, their reaction will not be as severe.

Who knows, they may even want to help you in your quest to get laid, of course before Feb 3, 2009.

 

[MrMike]

Don't worry about what these guys will think. I'm part of a fraternity (Though, not a social one, its KKPsi, the honorary band fraternity), and I know my brothers couldn't care less if I'm a virgin or not.

If the brotherhood in your chapter is really important, they'll accept you for who you are and not give a damn if you're a virgin or not. Sure, you won't be able to participate in the "there was this one chick" stories, but who gives a damn.

If they truly are a good brotherhood, they won't care.

 

[L777]

I really don't see any reason for bashing a fraternity...... especially if you haven't actually been part of one. There is always this rediculous idea that you are "buying your friends" and nonsense like that.

I was in a fraternity in college and it something I will never regret. I met about 5 or 6 guys that I became really good friends with. We still hang out all the time and I have been out of college for 6 years. A fraternity is a group of guys who wanna have fun and have a place to hang out. Yeah, sure you pay dues each month, but that is to finance one hell of a good time. Awesome parties, sports, and truly a place to harvest friendships....not to mention so much fvcking pvssy that you can't stand it. If you go out to a bar and somebody fvcks with you, then there are usually 15-20 guys who have your back immediately. It was a great time for me.

I would recommend being honest with your brothers. If its a good fraternity, then everyone will respect your decision to wait.

My opinion

By the way, I was an SAE

lol, your brothers?? "Dude, big party in Alpha Ep Kap Pi Sig tonight....F.UCK yeah dude, peace out." SO sad. Seriously, you can get laid without a frat, and not hang around with di.ckheads at the same time...but I guess following the crowd is easy....ah well, only in America I guess. F.UCK YEAH!!

 

[kingwilliam]

lol, your brothers?? "Dude, big party in Alpha Ep Kap Pi Sig tonight....F.UCK yeah dude, peace out." SO sad. Seriously, you can get laid without a frat, and not hang around with di.ckheads at the same time...but I guess following the crowd is easy....ah well, only in America I guess. F.UCK YEAH!!

This is an example of an ass hole who has no idea what he's talking about because he hasn't been there. I don't recall anyone saying that you needed a fraternity to get laid. I didn't need anyone to get laid. I DON'T need anyone to get laid. I guess your interpretation of a fraternal organization is what you see in the movies. Fortunately it is nothing like what the movie industry or television makes it out to be.

Most of the United States Presidents have been in fraternities. Fraternities make up for a majority of campus fund raising and community service projects. My fraternity required a certain grade point average in order to stay active. Not to mention the fact that you build a network of resources that will benefit you for life.

If you don't know what you're talking about you should shut the **** up.

 

[FutureSpartan]

This is an example of an ass hole who has no idea what he's talking about because he hasn't been there. I don't recall anyone saying that you needed a fraternity to get laid. I didn't need anyone to get laid. I DON'T need anyone to get laid. I guess your interpretation of a fraternal organization is what you see in the movies. Fortunately it is nothing like what the movie industry or television makes it out to be.

Most of the United States Presidents have been in fraternities. Fraternities make up for a majority of campus fund raising and community service projects. My fraternity required a certain grade point average in order to stay active. Not to mention the fact that you build a network of resources that will benefit you for life.

If you don't know what you're talking about, kid, you should shut the **** up.

You see I feel the same way. Getting laid is not by #1 reason for joining, granted its one of the reasons. I approach girls on campus in my spare time anyways. Kappa Sigma btw.

Its just I have had to work out some serious self-esteem issues in the past year. If you saw me now, you would probably be shocked if I told you I was virgin. Im a well dressed decent looking guy and there are plenty of average guys I know that arent virgins. You think virgin, you think about that really scrawny dude from Road Trip.

I guess I should not give a f*ck what they think anyways. If some of the guys want to give me sh*t about it, well then I guess that says a lot about what they base their validation on.

However, Im not gonna get on the soap box and say Im proud to be a virgin. But a combination of low self-esteem, horrible game, and generally unfavorable circumstances prevented this sh*t from just happening. Now I am working to reprogram myself gradually so, eventually, it does happen.

 

[Kidfabulous]

Future,
Funny you're in Kappa Sig, I have some buddies in it out West here. Some guys aren't bad, but others ehhh... It all depends on what the people make it.
Me, I can't stand frats but that's me. I got nothing against people in them as long as they don't act like asses.
To the OP; play it by ear. If it seems like the attitude in the room is too much for you, do what YOU think is right.