Tell me, when do I next her?

[For_F]

Just my impression from what I've read, it seems to me that she's f**king with you. And also this part "If she blows me off again I'll feel pathetic." I think that's where your instincts are kicking in to protect you. It's very normal to wonder and be curious if a person is going to accept your invite or not. This seems past that point. I may also be more 'attuned' to this, having recently been in a situation where a girl seems highly interested (inviting herself over), yet, meanders and is not responsive (hitting on other guys in front of you the next day).

I would do something with the attitude "Yeah sure, sound good", sound interested sort of, but uninvested.

Just sent her a message, posted what I said. I pretty much tried to stamp out the bullsh1t she's running with. Trying to make her understand that yes I did/do find you worthy of a phuck but your pvssy is no more special then the chick down the street so stop acting like it is.

 

[Pimp-sicle]

Okay I may have fvcked things up but I took advice from both sides lol which probably wasn't the best of options.

I pretty much said: Hey you should have texted me letting me know you were going to be busy on the weekend that would have been cool, i've been busy too As far as meeting up, don't know what to expect with you and don't want to set something up because you went MIA last time lol. Just thought it would be good to get to know you otherwise talk to you later.

Well now that I know you two did exchange #'s that does change my opinion a bit.

The simple answer is your not her #1 option, pretty obvious with her convenient excuses about being busy etc etc.

However the fact that she is initiating offers is good, but now its time to see if her actions match up with her words.

I know what you were trying to convey with your message, and while you did good in being straight forward and not sounding needy, generally things like that are best left unsaid, esp with a girl you barely know.

The good news is she will either put up if she truly is interested and be more open to actually getting together or she will disappear again.

Overall I think you did fairly well here; you either will get the date or you will save yourself from the headache and let this girl move on and play her little game on someone else.






PIMP

 

[For_F]

Going for dinner with her in 10 minutes for anyone who cares. I'd sure be interested in it if I was on this site because it's providing a good situation a lot of men face.

Quickly - She BLEW up after I sent that message. Sent 5 messages and got 3 missed calls all basically involving how dare you call me unreliable and you don't even know me followed by I didn't have credit and I never saw any missed calls from you - all bull****. I have to head out now to meet her but will let you guys know how it went and how she prettymuch begged for the date tonight.

 

[Sneevox]

A week later I saw her again and acted indifferent

See, this is where I always screw up. A girl isn't interested anymore and you begin to act differently. This shows that you were only acting. They immediately see through your veil and call you "fake". Then they go and tell all of their little girly friends and they all think you're a big dork for being an "actor".


To paraphrase Anti-Dump, "You should treat every girl the same at all times, whether it be an old hag, a young and hot model, your little sister, your mother, your girlfriend, or even your wife."

Basically, try to keep "tactics" out of it and just stay indifferent to the girl.
After all, she is the one earning you.

 

[Sandow]

Why are you scolding her, you don't ever know her! She doesn't even know you and you're already acting like her dad.

Also, why are you letting her how you feel? So much for being a mystery and letting her know you are potentially emotionally unstable.

You may or may not get a response, but for someone you barely know, keep your cool, less talking, and show no emotion.

 

[Sandow]

Ok, just read your post that you guys are going out to dinner. I would say there are definitely some red flags with this girl. Whether you want to pay attention or ignore is up to you, but don't say we didn't warn you.

She is clearly attracted to jerks/asholes...and was probably in an abusive relationship before. She seems to like the indifferance and aloofness you are displaying (some girls, actually lots, crave this shyt). And she really wants to go on a date after blowing up on you while you called her unreliable...weird and red flag.

Anyhow, would be interested to see how this date works out. Let us know.

 

[For_F]

Before I get to the date, I eventually picked up one of her phone calls. She opened politely asking how I was then she confronted me in a very feminist type nature. She was trying to get control when all she was doing was losing control. After about 5 - 10 minutes of back and forth (wasn't an argument more like a bloody debate) she asked me if I was free to meet tonight I said no. Asked about tomorrow night I said working late (both true) then asked about next week and I said ring me next week and I'll see how my schedule looks because I've been inundated lately. She asked if I could please find time to meet her and to get back to her. I said tonight I'll see and get back to her. Now, I'm going to be very busy from tomorrow onwards for a week no time for girls so I said ok tonight meet me at X at time Y she said I will be there

Met up, great dinner conversation, waitress came around a few times to ask for our orders but time flew by we didn't even look at the menu. Ate, went for half hour walk around then we went to where we both parked kiss on the lips goodbye.

Woke up this morning to a message from her saying Hey thank you for a lovely night

 

[penkitten]

dear original poster,
if you are asking if you should next someone, then maybe you should.

 

[For_F]

dear original poster,
if you are asking if you should next someone, then maybe you should.

Not necessarily. I'm here to learn and expand upon my own game. Before 2012 or even a few months ago, I was a very emotional person and that hindered my game massively. If a girl lacked interest or acted like a princess, I would quickly put her in her place and next her without giving her an opportunity to make up for it.

In relationships I was either too involved or not involved at all. I've become strongly attached to a couple girls and it messed me up and the relationships I was in. I can claim it was mainly their fault but from what I've learnt here - I was too available to her, gave up nearly all my own hobbies and interests for her, let myself go physically and was suffering oneitis.

I'm on SS because I admit.my faults and don't want to keep making them a apart of my life while Im still so young.

 

[Pimp-sicle]

Not necessarily. I'm here to learn and expand upon my own game. Before 2012 or even a few months ago, I was a very emotional person and that hindered my game massively. If a girl lacked interest or acted like a princess, I would quickly put her in her place and next her without giving her an opportunity to make up for it.

In relationships I was either too involved or not involved at all. I've become strongly attached to a couple girls and it messed me up and the relationships I was in. I can claim it was mainly their fault but from what I've learnt here - I was too available to her, gave up nearly all my own hobbies and interests for her, let myself go physically and was suffering oneitis.

I'm on SS because I admit.my faults and don't want to keep making them a apart of my life while Im still so young.

Well said, great post.


If you keep this attitude you will learn a lot and progress rapidly and consistently over time.









PIMP

 

[dosquito]

"I don't chase em, I replace em"
-NOtorious BIG

 

[sighsigh]

Big mistake guys make with texting women. DON'T TALK TO HER IN 3 DAYS. Do it in 3-5 hours, it will make things seem more natural, and fluid. Waiting 3 days will obviously demonstrate you are playing the game here, disinterested, or a big wuss.

Well, I personally disagree with this. Shockingly, most girls do not frequent PUA sites and have no idea what PUA tactics are. I highly doubt that the first thought a girl will have when you don't call her back immediately is "he must be pulling off some PUA crap."

I mean, if you are a pro in picking up girls, it won't matter if you wait 3 days or call back the next minute. You'll get the girl either way. But for beginners, I believe it is a good rule to wait 3 days or so to call so that you don't give out a needy vibe.