"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Tell me what she means...

Zarky

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So I have this friend from grad school, call him John. We're no longer close, but still Facebook friends. He had this super hot russian chick with him in.a bunch of his FB photos. I figured she was just a friend because she's way out of his league. So I posted sort of a come-on under this photo of her in a bikini. This was like a year ago and I don't remember what I said. She responded to it. We had a couple of comments and then John commented.

So then the chick friended me. I made another suggestive comment on one of her wall posts, which she didn't respond well to, so I unfriended her. I really don't remember any of what was said, just the overall gist. Then today,after no contact in a year and after I'd forgotten all about it, I get a FB message from her.

She's very Russian, so I'm not sure what it means. It goes:

"John told me I'm single. What's up?"

I don't exactly know what this means. I think I know, but would like to hear what you think. Even more importantly, I'm interested in what you think her statement implies about what she wants from me. And most importantly, what do you think my response should be?
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Joe Stud

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"I will be at abc tavern for happy hour thurs nite. I expect to see you there". Simple as that.........
 
P

perseverance

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It sounds like John told her you're single and she is interested.

People don't realise just how forward some European women are especially Eastern European women. They're not your typical American women who expect to be waited on hand and foot.
 

Zarky

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all right, good. Yes I had the vibe that I should move fast and be direct and so I did. So we're getting together tonight. More details to come.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Zarky

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Eh, we made plans to go to a wine bar near her place. I suggested that I park near her and that we walk together. She wanted to take a cab. It's not that cold nor dangerous where she lives, and about a 10 minute walk tops. So I canceled. Too high-maintenance.

Zarky rule #2: Fold early, fold often.


EDIT: To address the post below this one (hit 10 messages today):

From what I got from our conversation, the plan was for me to go to her place, then we'd get a cab and ride the few blocks to our destination. She just didn't want to walk, as far as I know.

Either way, doesn't matter now. A few months ago a chick invited me over to her place after 30 minutes of chatting online. When there are girls out there who will do that, why am I going to bother with chicks who don't even want to walk to a destination with me?

EDIT 2: To address the third post below this post..

Don't you people read? She never said meet her there.
 
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Tiguere

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She doesnt know you so i dont blame her for not letting you pick her up and deciding to meet you there instead. You need to build rapport and comfort before expecting a girl to jump on the firsg opportunity to get in your car with you.
 

Someone Much cooler

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she dint wanna meet him there. she wanted him to take her in a cab as opposed to taking a stroll together. I just nexted a chick for that crap. I hate weak soft prissy girls
 

Chickfight

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You nexted a super hot Russian chick because she wanted to meet you there?
Bahaha, maybe she likes wearing heels or something or just doesn't like walking. Besides she doesn't even know you yet. I think you nexted too hastily on this one buddy.
 

PapiChulo

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Chickfight said:
You nexted a super hot Russian chick because she wanted to meet you there?
Bahaha, maybe she likes wearing heels or something or just doesn't like walking. Besides she doesn't even know you yet. I think you nexted too hastily on this one buddy.
Yes, russian women wear high heels everywhere even if its icy and snowy outside. Keep in mind that they expect to be treated extremely well - all this "dont treat her like a princess" goes out the window. They are high maintenance and expect to be taken care of. We are talking traditional masculine and feminine roles here, and yes you pay everywhere for everything.

She is the real deal, right? Not one of those that were brought up in the West?
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Joe Stud

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The old saying is: "you can lead a horse to water, but you cant make him drink".

We led you to the water, and even dunked your head into the trough.

Then.. you pulled away, urinated into the water, and ran away.

WTF dude, she wanted to wear some sexy spiked heels to get you excited for the wild sex she was gonna give you later in the evening. and you spit in her face! LOL
 

Zarky

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Lol

Little update. Today she emailed me saying, "So are you going to go out with me?" Looks like it's back on. :yes:

Lesson learned, guys? Lesson learned??

Yes, russian women wear high heels everywhere even if its icy and snowy outside. Keep in mind that they expect to be treated extremely well - all this "dont treat her like a princess" goes out the window. They are high maintenance and expect to be taken care of. We are talking traditional masculine and feminine roles here, and yes you pay everywhere for everything.
However, this may in the end kill it for me. I don't like playing "sugar daddy."

She is the real deal, right? Not one of those that were brought up in the West?
Oh she's about as Russian as you can get. And she's 10 years younger than I am. :yes: This is her on vacation..




I bet she doesn't get "nexted" an awful lot. ;)
 
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pipe007

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lol a second chance!!

awesome go for it, and update us!
 

5string

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Zarky.....I think you should keep after it. Let us know if she really does wear heels n stuff. FR expected.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Tiguere

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useless update. take her out and comeback here with a REAL update.
 

Zarky

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Tiguere said:
useless update. take her out and comeback here with a REAL update.
LOL there might not be one, which is why I posted now. If she pisses me off again I'll be posting something like "Well she asked if we could go to a nicer place than I originally suggested so I told her to f*** off." ;)

Isn't it Roissy who says that the younger the girl, the more she falls for "uncaring as*hole" game? Clearly my original behavior didn't seem to deter her.
 

Zarky

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FYI I haven't forgotten about this thread, the date was just so incredibly ****ty that I haven't really wanted to think about it. I will in the next couple days though.
 

Joe Stud

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nothin for nothin zark, but from the get-go you seemed poised and ready to jump on any/all opportunities to find fault in her, thus achieving a self-fulfilled profecy: nexting her

next time you might wanna work toward escalating and f-closing..... not building a case against her like a NYC prosecutor!

I take it you are NOT in sales?
 

yuppaz

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ya bro - what Joe Stud said. You looked ready to toss the ***** at any given opportunity....stop reading Roissey.... I'm pretty sure he comes off as an uncarring ******* on his blog, but if you look into what he does on dates, it's not just "bend over now bi*ch". He does some "We are lovers" type stuff and builds comfort too.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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