"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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teasing into the friendzone?

andee

Don Juan
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how far can i go with teasing? from what im told by this girl, she told im the only guy who is mean/an ass to her, because i call her names, make fun of her, and according to her ive hung up on her 3xs on the phone (ive had good reason to). but i figure, she must put up with a lot of this crap because she has some sort of interest in me and cos its probably rare for guys in general to do this to her? there is kino as well (tickling, hugging, touching). and of course i compliment here and there, in the beginning i admit i complimented too much and ive been using them sparingly now.

tonight i told her something like, "hey, u kno that guy that's been wanting to get with u? ask him to get both of his female friends' numbers that are in our class for me. ill gladly trade u for them. blah blah blah" she responded it with "hahahaha, your such a *****, andee. i bet their tainted goods. blah blah blah" in a playful manner.

how do u kno if u bust their balls too much and they're not just hiding their real emotions. she's told me before its hard for her to get mad, which im sure is a lie or it means she just gets sad instead. i dont want her to go home or be driving home with her self esteem a notch lower.

also, are some girls blind when it comes to guys showing interest like teasing or kino? it seems like she's enjoying all this, but still think im not into her because maybe every guy she's encountered is generally pretty nice towards her.

to me, it feels like ive entered the friendzone or she's interested. i actually dont care if im in the friendzone since this is the only girl in a long time where i made an effort to go a girl--i guess u cant always succeed your first few tries, and she's actually interesting to keep around.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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BadsnakeUK

Don Juan
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Apr 25, 2008
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It sounds a little too close to call without a lot more specifics. I'd turn down the teasing a bit and see how things develop. If you still feel it could go somewhere after this then the only way to find out is to make a move. Be prepared to lose your friend or for things to be awkward if you make a move and she says no though. This choice is up to you.

And no, women are never blind when men are showing interest (unless the guy's being such a p*ssy that no-one would guess he likes her). What they are is very good at playing blind when they want to avoid having to deal with a situation.
 
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