Taste in women.

[rhcp83]

It's funny how small things happen in your life and then it changes your outlook completely.

Full disclosure: I'm on a small amount of an anti-depressant. Chemical depression runs in the family. That didn't stop me from obsessing over porn, masturbation, "hot women" and the like 24/7...beyond any normal guy level.

So I was put on clonapin (1mg to be exact...which is nothing at all) to lessen the obsessive thinking...and my interest in women is still very much there, just different. I don't look at porn anymore, hardly ever masturbate (maybe once every 2 weeks to clean the pipes) and don't even notice the type of hot women that most guys would just notice because they want to sleep with them. You see these women for what they are and aren't just thinking about a sexual fantasy.

I always liked women like Elaine from Seinfeld or Roz or Daphne from Frasier, but never thought about pursuing someone like that because they didn't have enough "sex appeal." The fact is, for a relationship, you want someone that is low maintenance (unless you like constant drama.) You want someone YOU'RE physically attracted to, but isn't going to go to the local convenience store and get drooled over and hit on by every guy there.

Personally, speaking for myself, I want a woman that I can tell her "You look beautiful" not in any means of supplication but because I truly believe it, and she hasn't heard it a million times a day in her life, yet at the same time she really is beautiful.

I want a woman that sure has a social life, but is past (or never was part of it to begin with) the bar hopping/club hopping scene. If she goes out, it's to a nice pub to hear music or a nice lounge or something, not to have a "AW night with the girls" at the local hangout.

It's weird...I have no desire for AW/club hot type women at all. Before I guess I wanted to find a way to bed them as some sort of revenge for the way I was treated in high school. Now I realize how immature of a goal that is, and unfortunately that is what drives a lot of men on this site...they weren't good with women at a young age, and pursue certain women for an ego boost.

Note...this doesn't apply to guys just looking for hookups...which is why I posted this in the mature forum. I'm also 28 anyway and not looking for a hookup.

 

[FairShake]

Welcome to adulthood.

But you need to come correct with women like that. They like their guys reasonably successful and interesting.

 

[SecondHalf]

There are those that I would have called attractive initially, but once love happens, they become beautiful to you.
As you see the bigger picture, you're blinded to superficial flaws (ironically).

I've been involved with 9's whose beauty in the end meant nothing to me so jaded was I on all the personality quirks that typically come with a 9+.

I've been involved (am involved) with 7's that eventually blew my socks off.

I'll take the grounded 7 over the attention hoe 9 any day.

 

[st_99]

meh, this sounds like afc thinking. i want someone average because i dont believe i can get or handle a "hot" girl long term. Its flawed attitude, your "average" attainable girl is the same damn thing you just dont know it. I think the op's line of thinking stinks.

 

[backbreaker]

meh, this sounds like afc thinking. i want someone average because i don't believe i can get or handle a "hot" girl long term. Its flawed attitude, your "average" attainable girl is the same damn thing you just don't know it. I think the op's line of thinking stinks.

I don't agree with this at all.

First, you are assuming that the women that he is reffering to aren't hot. if you actually think this

http://pinoytutorial.com/lifebytes/wp-content/uploads/2010/05/Julia-Louis-Dreyfus.jpg

isn't considered extremely attractive by an avg male, you have a warped sense of reality my friend. Juli Louis Dreyfus is at the very last good looking on anyone's scale.

The way I see it, and this is a very basic point of view, is you have "general" hot and you have "specific" hot.

As you are a kid, or a young adult, you are attracted to the (younger version) Linsay Lohans of the world, i.e womenj whose sole attention to fame, are just the fact that they are hot. Pamela Anderson, Brianna Banks, etc, the only thing you know about them is that they are hot. they are smoking hot actually.

I don't want to necessarily say the older you get, but the more you develop as a person, and the more you define your taste beyond cup and pant size, the more you realize what you do and don't like.

When I was younger, I had the biggest crush on Brittany Snow. I knew nothing about her other than I thought she was extremely attractive.

The more I started to fade away into my business ventures, and the more time I spent alone by myself, I realized quickly, that I was attracted to classy women. It was around that time Catherine Zeta Jones was doing the T mobile commercial, and a t that time she was just it to me. I actually went to go see that POS movie Intolerable cruatly, hell the friday it came out lol must to see her (and she didn't disappoint).

lol, you going to sit here and tell me Catherine Zeta Jones isn't hot? I'd come through this PC screen and shake some sense into you lol. lol, it was also around the tiem I realized I had a thing for brit's (though CZJ is actually welch)

following this same path, my next "crush" was Emily Mortimer

(here is a pic incase you aren't famialr with her, played in shutter, a few other movies)

http://whatculture.com/wp-content/uploads/2006/12/3645941163.jpg

she's a brit as well, very petite, very leggy

It has nothing to do with "settling", my tastes are just recalibrating to account for my life experiences and what I actually want. it's not that I don't find Brittany snow cute, lol i'd plow the **** out of her if i saw her in a club or something and i was single... but it's just that, when i am at home in bed getting ready to go sleep, that's not the type of girl I'm dreaming about anymore.

so at the age of 17 ish, i like generic skinny women. by the age of 23, and mind you, by now i have plates galore, i prefer classier petite, and if possible, british women lol. that's quite a difference in taste. combine that with my love for horse racing and you see a distinct difference in tastes then when I was younger.

Then I met Millie ball who is a TV host for one of the horse racing channels.. very attractive, brit, petite, loves horse racing.. though a bit too old for me, but still, at that point i was like, okay this is the template for what i want in a woman lol. and i'll be damned if i didn't met her a few months later.

 

[st_99]

The chick in that pick is hot has hell!

i should probably clarify what I meant. When it comes to looks I have 2 categories, acceptable and unacceptable, thats it. Then its, what else you got (personality, history, job, etc)?

I think its afc to think I want to step down to a certain level of hottness because thats where I think I'll find someone good for me. Thats bullsh*t. You can never judge a girl by her looks, good or bad.

 

[backbreaker]

The chick in that pick is hot has hell!

i should probably clarify what I meant. When it comes to looks I have 2 categories, acceptable and unacceptable, thats it. Then its, what else you got (personality, history, job, etc)?

I think its afc to think I want to step down to a certain level of hottness because thats where I think I'll find someone good for me. Thats bullsh*t. You can never judge a girl by her looks, good or bad.

that's kinda the point of the OP's post

you think he is "stepping down" and he thinks he is "stepping up", hence why it's called "taste"
PS- the woman who you said was hot as hell is "Elaine from Seinfied"

 

[5string]

samspade is right as usual. I ended up marrying the uber hot chick. So hot in fact I didn't think I could pull it off. I did though. The tables have now turned and she is always saying I'm the best man, and she never thought she could get a high quality guy like me. I'm on the pedestal. Came home late from out of town last night and there was a welcome home note on the garage door. She was also waiting up for me.

Always set your sights higher when it comes to women fellas. You may very well surprise yourself.

 

[FairShake]

I'm a nerd dude and I want a nerd chick. Just because society conditions you to want a drunken club girl doesn't mean you have to walk down that path. The epitome of DJ learning the skills to make yourself happy. If you want to bed as many girls out of bar as you can that's fine. But if you want to slay a series of nerd, hipster, and hippie chicks then have enjoyable conversation, a microbrew, and an overpriced cupcake or two afterwards than goddamnit that's what being a man is all about.

 

[The Bad Ass Canadian]

samspade is right as usual. I ended up marrying the uber hot chick. So hot in fact I didn't think I could pull it off. I did though. The tables have now turned and she is always saying I'm the best man, and she never thought she could get a high quality guy like me. I'm on the pedestal. Came home late from out of town last night and there was a welcome home note on the garage door. She was also waiting up for me.

Always set your sights higher when it comes to women fellas. You may very well surprise yourself.

True but this line of thought is a divergence from what the OP is talking about. As someone mentioned, it's called adulthood.

You start to value what a really great woman, with an amazing personality and a lot of depth and integrity can bring to your life. If she's beautiful to you, then really that is all that matters.

Stumbling over a chick because she's hot is a young man's trip... Mature men tend to see past that, when we're looking for a potential relationship. But, if it's hookups and such, then the hotter the better.

You just might have hit a home run, if the woman you married has all the qualities the OP is talking about, to go along with her looks. Congrats.

Those are rare birds, as we both know most of the 9.9s have a lot of "stuff" going on. The attention they get does something to their brains. How would anyone feel/act, when their options in dating are basically limitless? Their always looking for the bigger, better deal. Sadly, they tend to favor the guys who treat 'em pretty poorly. Like a breath of fresh air from all the gawkers.

 

[5string]

I'm a nerd dude and I want a nerd chick. Just because society conditions you to want a drunken club girl doesn't mean you have to walk down that path. The epitome of DJ learning the skills to make yourself happy. If you want to bed as many girls out of bar as you can that's fine. But if you want to slay a series of nerd, hipster, and hippie chicks then have enjoyable conversation, a microbrew, and an overpriced cupcake or two afterwards than goddamnit that's what being a man is all about.

Nothing wrong with this ^^^^ although I never wanted a drunken club girl for anything other than the obvious. It's all about what each of us desires. I'm happy, and glad you are as well brother. :yes:

 

[rhcp83]

http://www.designhouseideas.com/julianne-moores-west-village-townhouse.html

I dated a woman who looked like this only mid 20s and without the airbrushing and fancy clothes. I think we'd all agree, regardless of taste, that this woman is at least "attractive."

She'd get checked out by guys, and not even notice or care. In fact, one time she chewed out a guy because "Can't you see I'm with someone else" and put her arm closer around me.

It's like she wasn't even aware she was good looking. She had a very sassy, down to earth personality like a Julia Louis Dreyfus (Elaine) or Peri Gilpin (Roz)...didn't clothes shop at all (but didn't dress like a scrub either) and was very easy to talk to.

She had her personality faults of course, she wasn't perfect and came with some baggage, but my point is, when I was dating her, I was conflicted at the time. Part of me wanted someone like Brooklyn Decker or Alice Eve from "She's Out Of My League" ironically enough...some over-the-top hot tan blonde.

What I realize now is 1.)It was an ego thing. I couldn't get "that type of girl" in high school and wanted to prove to myself that I could get someone like that. 2.)I was just thinking with my d1ck. I'm not saying an Alice Eve type woman is a bad person...but not the type of person I am.

I'm a nerd that likes his down time and when he does go out, it's to the local pub just to get a screwdriver and hear some good music or to take pictures of beautiful areas. What good would some AW be for me long term other than hot sex that would surely get old after it ran its course?

Almost 3 years later, I still think about the Julianne Moore lookalike and haven't been able to replace her despite doing some dating. I see "hot girls" all the time, but not women that give me "that feeling" and I actually connect with on a deep level and have a different kind of attraction to.

Don't get me wrong, for a night, I'd ram the crap out of Alice Eve or Brooklyn Decker, I'm not saying that, but for long term, I have different ideas of happiness.

What I'm also realizing is, with a lot of these "sexier" women the body fizzles. Back in the day I used to sweat Natasha Henstridge from Species. Last time I looked her up (and she's only early-mid 30s)...there are pictures of her somewhere in a bikini from a couple years ago...she looks like a 3 or 4...cottage cheese thighs, bloated face etc. . and she basically said that to maintain that body she had all those years, she starved herself, was on diet pills, and over-exercised.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying go for fatties or blah chicks...not the point at all. I'm saying go for what's attractive to YOU, not your d1ck because the "really hot" girl is only 20 pounds away from being a 3 anyway.

If what you want is hook ups and one night stands, this doesn't apply. But I don't see personally why any guy would want to date some AW.

 

[st_99]

What I'm saying is your entire thought process is all wrong.

You say, "i'd ram the crap out of alice eve or brooklyn decker" "im also realizing the body fizzles" "dont get me wrong.. no fatties"

I mean listen to yourself, you're just rationalizing away your fear or lack of
self worth to get "the girl you want to ram the crap out of" You justify it by saying these are not the type of girls you want to be with long term, cuz they are not your type.

How the hell do you know that? Have you talked to and dated many brooklyn decker look alikes and concluded that scientificaly any girl that looks like that must not be my type? And thus you think that the average cute girl MUST be the type that would be compatible with you? Thats complete and total nonsense,.. that cute average "nerdy" chick probably has 10x more guys hitting on her because all these afc shmucks think they can GET THAT because she isnt too hot.

This thread is sh!t. It disgusts me. Its entirely based on fear.

 

[Burroughs]

How the hell do you know that? Have you talked to and dated many brooklyn decker look alikes and concluded that scientificaly any girl that looks like that must not be my type? And thus you think that the average cute girl MUST be the type that would be compatible with you? Thats complete and total nonsense,.. that cute average "nerdy" chick probably has 10x more guys hitting on her because all these afc shmucks think they can GET THAT because she isnt too hot.

This thread is sh!t. It disgusts me. Its entirely based on fear.

gotta concur with you a 100% on this.

But sadly its what men do in 2011...they make up elaborate mental schemas to 'logic' away the holes in their lives. Instead of just facing the truth in the face, lifting weights, building that company, writing that screenplay thats going to elevate them to be better and to consequently have the confidence to fvck that hb10 in the azz and cvm in her face...they'd rather convince themselves that 'a solid 7' is the 'right' way to go.

I mean if you believe it fine, but don't rationalize it and mythologize it. Cause that 7 may not be as wholesome as you think she OUGHT to be

 

[rhcp83]

It's called growing up and going for what you really want. Even if I could, I wouldn't want some Brooklyn Decker lookalike for an LTR even if she was a nice person, liked me, respected me, et al. That isn't rationalizing or fear, it's called being realistic.

What would I possibly have in common with someone like her? (And I know women like her in person.) I don't party, I'm not high-maintenance, I'm not overly into style or go out all the time. Let's assume for a second that she's some rare gem of a woman that has those looks and isn't a b*tch or full of herself...doesn't even matter. I'm a low-key guy who is true to myself and doesn't try to be someone I'm not.

I also don't think love is a challenge. If you're in it because you love the challenge of keeping and "taming" a "really hot girl" then good for you, not trying to change your mind, do what you want. I'm just saying it's immature and something an 18 year old would want to do. The guys like that on this site are no different than the girls dating a bad boy then complaining to their girlfriends about how awful he is.

I'm also saying the cute sassy girls are MY type...and saying to find whatever YOUR type is, not your **** or ego's type.

Having a "really hot" girlfriend or wife shouldn't be the goal of life. It's just a status thing. Like someone else said, if you found a girl with super hot looks that has all the qualities of an every day cute girl and doesn't overdress/party/have a lot of drama, congrats.

I can tell st99 doesn't go out a lot because that's the truth, the hotter chicks get hit on MORE, thus the ego. Or girls that dress like they're hot/think they're hotter than they are (AWs...7s that think they're 10s.)

 

[backbreaker]

i tried to bite my tongue but i'm tipsy now and fvck it


am I really the only one that sees the ass backwards logic going on in this thread?


OP starts a post that says "tastes in women" and notes that his tastes have changed as things happened in his life.

meaning, he is attracted to different types of women than he used to be.

Here comes the ass backwards logic crew telling everyone, that becuase you don't want to fvck women I think are 10's you are a failure at life rotfl.


newsflash. that's why it's called TASTES.

The women who I would rate as a... 8 today, i would not have rated an 8 10 years ago. I thought my oneitis was a true 10 ten years ago, i would give her a solid 8 now. p art of that is because i live in California and i see smoking hot women everyday now. part of that is, as i got older, i realized she wasn't as much as my type i thought she was. she's still quite attractive.

so because i now don't rate the same woman i rated a 10, 10 years ago, somehow i'm the failure, and the guy who still is still in the same mental stages as he was 10 years ago is "killing it?"

get fvcking real

actually, ironically enough this goes hand in hand with my "epifipany" post. the more interesting you become, the more your tastes "hone", the more you realize what you do and don't like.

my oneitis looks, literarly, the exact same as she did damn near verbatium at 28 than she did at 18.


this is her this year

http://katv.images.worldnow.com/images/13840165_BG1.jpg


this is her 10 years ago

http://i237.photobucket.com/albums/ff85/strawberryroad/2005-08-18/c73f.jpg (actually about 8 years ago)

she did not change (for the most part). I changed. what I find hot, isn't necessarily what i found "hot" 10 years ago. and I assure you that i did not settle for my wife.

but what i find disturbing is ****s telling other ****s what they should get hard to. my **** will beat to it's own drum thank you very much.

you don't know what a person's life is like, what a persons dreams, quirks

if you are attracted to the same *****es you were attracted to a decade ago for the same reasons,k you aren't living life.

whatsoever.

lol do you even understand the concept of settling for something?

settling for something means, you want and desire one thing, but instead you take something else you think is more obtainiable. i.e, you really want a porche, b ut you will settle for a used honda. if you still really secretly want the porsche afte ryou bought the honda, that's settling

but it's not possible to settle for something that you are activaly desiring. that's where your hangup is. regardless of why you think that person is desiring that such thing, that's what he has set his mind on. lol youa re telling people what they should and should not desire, not what they are actively choosing, but what they are dreaming about, rubbing one out to, lol. so a guy can only jack off now to a pre approved list of women lol? how fvcked up / sick is that?


even if you are talking from just a strictly physical standpoint it's a failure of an argument. different people, value different things differently. for instance, i value legs higher than most guys do "(and feet lol, defiantly feet). Much more now than I did when I was in HS. my wife is 5'11, a good 3 inches taller than me and is all hips and legs. so a woman who you might think is just a "smoking hot HB9" i might think is a 7 because she has short stumpy legs. they just don't do anything for me. I like legs that go all the way to the floor. nothing to me is sexier than a leggy woman in a short dress/skirt with pumps on. that's just my tastes. so you are telling me that now becuase i like to **** leggy women instead of short legged women, i'm a loser.

On the other hand, some guy might think my wife is a HB7 (I would call her a solid 8.5 honestly from a 100% physical standpoint) because she doesn't have big breasts or a huge ass. lol i need to stop, she probab doesn't approve of me talking about her like this lol. let me go before i get in trouble.

 

[Burroughs]

Some men think 45 year old Sinead O'Connor is hot.

http://music.yahoo.com/blogs/stop-t...or-marries-boyfriend-las-vegas-163743485.html

I guess there is no accounting for taste

 

[backbreaker]

she kinda does have the Evy Hammond v for vendetta thing going for er

 

[rhcp83]

http://www.contactmusic.com/photo/peri_gilpin_2815462

realize they're old now, but back then when frasier was big and they were 30something, that's exactly what i'm looking for. either one.

 

[backbreaker]

this is going well off topic but the show fraizer brings back bad memoris for me.

my old business partner, and keep in mind, when i say old, i mean, 9 years ago lol and 2 19-20 year olds, had it in his mind that wqe should be more "mature like the guys on fraizer" so he would sit around and watch frazier all day and try to talk and do **** like they did on the TV show. god i wanted to punch that dude in the mouth lol. it's one thing to want to become the best you that you can become, but i hate biters, people who try to be like someone else, and particularly someone who just tries not to be who they really are. I'm not freaking fraizer. I'm a 20 year old black male. I mean I may be married to a white woman but I am very much black, and damn proud of it. Not black panther proud but, not ashamed to be who I am proud. I am who exactly who I am supposed to be. LIke everything he did was to try not to be black. that was the main difference in us, he was smart as hell, but a poser. I hate posers.]


ps- dahanie could defiantly get bent over a table or two