talking negatively about something...attraction killer

[pyros]

I've noticed that when I am on a date with a girl or texting her, sometimes I criticise something for example: a sport, or how some ppl behave, or some music etc, just to realise that she liked what I just criticised or that she behaves the way I criticise.

For example, I may say:

me: "you know, I dont understand these girls that are in the gym all the time, eat super healthy etc, they are kind of nuts."

her: "well my best friend is like that, I dont know why you dont like it, I do it too"

or

her: "well, I train five days a week and like to eat healthy, ppl that dont are always tired and boring"

If this happens a couple of times in the same conversation, her initial attraction for me vanishes, because she starts to think that we have little in common.
So I am thinking that I should stop commenting in a negative way whatever we're talking about because she may like to do what I criticise, or she may think just the opposite, so the end result is: her attraction for me or the way she thinks about me changes negatively.

Dont you agree? this is something I realised recently.

P.S.

Just today, I texted this chick and it happened see this:
me: "did you like the performance we did last night? (salsa performance)"
her: "yes, it was good"
me: "well, I did not like how the teacher prepared everything, it seemed uncoordinated and a bit clumsy"
her: "our teacher you mean? I think he did ok. It is just that some ppl do not practice as often as they should"
me: "well, the ones that do not practise enough should not go on stage"
her: "they did ok, I didnt see anybody out of place"
me: "I prefer to practise hard so the end result is better. Everybody was nice though"
me: "are you in college or what do you do besides dancing?"

-- end of conversation--

I think I should not have said that I did not like the way we performed, neither the way the teacher prepared us, cause it seems she did like it...see?

 

[Comatozed]

Girl doesn't want to be around guy that is negative and moans about trivial things. Shock.

 

[narcissist]

Negativity/critical of everything, is one of the worst traits to have. Figure out a way to get rid of it brah, and you'll be good trust me!

 

[sylvester the cat]

Not just girls will lose their attraction but people in general. Only similar self loathing types would be attracted to negative people.

 

[Cremasta]

I think you're getting the message to avoid negativity whenever you can.
But if you just can't help yourself, then try mixing in a compliment, so you can still make your criticism, but it doesn't sound so bad. For example, try turning this:

me: "you know, I dont understand these girls that are in the gym all the time, eat super healthy etc, they are kind of nuts."

into

"you know, I don't understand these girls that are in the gym all the time, eat super healthy etc, that's serious discipline, I think they are kind of nuts." <then smile>

But yeah, constant criticism isn't sexy, try not to let it into conversations.

 

[pyros]

it is not that I criticise everything, or many times, nothing further from the truth. It is just that if we're texting and in the first exchanges I comment on somthing that she thinks the opposite, she thinks that we're different, or not compatible because of this, sooooo...game over. Same applies for a date. If you're talking and then you say something that she disagrees and thinks the opposite...wrong way...


Anyway, I'll try not to talk about anything in a negative way until she's into me, lOL.

 

[LMFAO]

Let her do 80% of the talking to avoid that or saying the wrong thing in the first few dates. Just move the conversation along with questions and give her some vague answers. Playfully disagreeing or saying something is fine though. Let her do the majority of the talking and work out in your mind a strategy to bend her over and f*** her.

 

[Zapp Brannigan]

You really have to be careful what you say to a female, especially if you don't know them very well. Saying something a little negative here and there is okay, but people don't like it if that's pretty much all you say.

Another attraction killer I've noticed is making off-color jokes. I saw a guy pretty much kill any chance he had with this girl, from making a off-color joke.