Talked about sex with hb over the phone.......advice please

[JEFE]

met a hb in the university and have been talking with her, I have been such a n AFC because she told me that she has a boyfriend.

There was a day when she calls me to meet with me and gived me a great surprice cos she was wearing a minimini skirt, this day I told her that she looks extreamly hot and that It was kiling me, but been the AFC I didn´t make a move.

Thursday last week I call her 10:00PM. ask what she was doing and she told me that she was watching the GRAMMYS, call you back I said, she tells me that ther is not problem that she wants to speak with me, but I tell her that I`ll call her later that night, she tell me that she will get mad with me if I don`t call her.

I called her later like 1AM start to speak with her ramdom stuff until the chat went to chocolate and sex.

because she says that chocolate is orgasmic for her

she tells me a lot, a lot of stuff things that I woldn`t belive if she wasn`t telling them to me

we speaked like for 2 hours, she told me her stories and I told her mine but, been such AFC did`t tell her "you are making me hot"

there were one moment when she told me that she tells me all this because I`m her FRIEND.

I don`t coment in this and continue chating of sex with her

she even told me that she f**k a guy that is 33 now, even when she have a boyfriend that is 25

my phone credit went to **** and the conversation ends abruptly, I didn`t tell her that I would like to f**k her.

FRIDAY 12:44AM
she send me a text mesage:
"hello I`m a mesage and I was sent to tell you that the person that send me apreciate you and wish you only the best"

it give me the impresion of a buyer remorse

I just reply:
"mmm you're still up?? don`t tell me that you are still thinking in chocolate!!! hahahaha -JEFE-"

SATURDAY 12:52 AM
another message
"if I need you, you give me your hand, if I`m happy you share my happines, if I`m sad you suport me and give me advice. For that and all the things you are my FRIEND"

FUUUUUCK!!!!!!

I Then reply:
" XXX XXX what friend talks XXX with you???. I don´t talk about sex if I`m not thinking about having it. I my mind many things have happening... you Know how is my imagination....hahahaha -JEFE-"

there was not a reply

SUNDAY: not a message

I send "is very pleaseant having a nice image of you in my mind baby. Sweet dreams -JEFE-"

there was no reply


I am waiting to see what happend.


I would apreciate your opinions and advice

what should I do??????

THANKS ON ADVANCED


pd:__________________________________________________________
sorry for my english

 

[horaholic]

"if I need you, you give me your hand, if I`m happy you share my happines, if I`m sad you suport me and give me advice. For that and all the things you are my FRIEND"

Womanspeak translation: "I will be your 'friend,' as long as everything is about me, a nd you kiss my ass."

One piece of advice I can give, is DONT send sexual texts unless you are both in the frame AT THAT TIME. If you are flirty to her, and things are going smooth one night, but things dont follow through, NEVER stay on that groove the next day or whatever. Girls buying temp spikes, and cools. You need to build up the attraction again with her next time, before going to that level. I've made this mistake as well.

The mistake is to assume she is still in a sexual mindset the next day or longer, and text her something sexual. That is a big mistake. Even though she was cool with it the night before, and going along with it, the next night when her mood changes, she will label you as a creep for the same things that turned her on the last time you saw her. Women are weird like that.

 

[Soprano]

Womanspeak translation: "I will be your 'friend,' as long as everything is about me, a nd you kiss my ass."

One piece of advice I can give, is DONT send sexual texts unless you are both in the frame AT THAT TIME. If you are flirty to her, and things are going smooth one night, but things dont follow through, NEVER stay on that groove the next day or whatever. Girls buying temp spikes, and cools. You need to build up the attraction again with her next time, before going to that level. I've made this mistake as well.

The mistake is to assume she is still in a sexual mindset the next day or longer, and text her something sexual. That is a big mistake. Even though she was cool with it the night before, and going along with it, the next night when her mood changes, she will label you as a creep for the same things that turned her on the last time you saw her. Women are weird like that.

true advice

 

[Mike32ct]

I agree with Horaholic. You can have the hottest text or even phone sex session with a chick, but don't try to mention it the next morning. Switch to something mundane and avoid the sex talk again until her buying temperature is up again. Otherwise it makes you a creepy pervert in her eyes.

Also, if a chick talks about sex with other guys, that's bad. That means you are her girlfriend. It's like porn to some guys. They get off listening to a chick's sex stories, but fail to realize that it will not get them laid.

General sex talk (without mentioning other guys) means she's either hot for you or an AW.

However, in your case, unfortunately, she has made it absolutely clear you are in friendzone. It's best to cut contact and pursue other women.

 

[DonGorgon]

Rule number 62: Never discuss sex until it has been done. and done well.

 

[JEFE]

that`s fuked up you guys, for all you replies I take that I ROLLAYLY ****E IT UP
thast the hard way of learning but what a ****.

I think my reply:

" XXX XXX what friend talks XXX with you???. I don´t talk about sex if I`m not thinking about having it. I my mind many things have happening... you now how is my imagination....hahahaha -JEFE-"

was forcing things. but I did it to let her know that I don´t want her as a friend

there was one time when I said to her "you can spect any thing from me except Lies"

I don´t want her to see me as a friend an put her trust in me when I just want to **** her :- /


some of you say "walk away" but I don`t know what do I let her know with this what I comunicate with this?

I havent speaked with her yet, think I will call her tonight, I will try to set a meet lets see how it goes.


please guys keep your opinions comming

 

[Igetit!]

I think my reply:

" XXX XXX what friend talks XXX with you???. I don´t talk about sex if I`m not thinking about having it. I my mind many things have happening... you now how is my imagination....hahahaha -JEFE-"

Amazing,simply amazing.


You've been here almost 3 years and yet,you made this noobie/rookie mistake.



Can't you see what you did wrong here?


You went at her LOGICALLY. You two had "logical" discussions about sex.


You're trying to get her sexually interested in you through logic.




Look at what you said to her. You said,"What friend talks about XXX with you??? I don't talk about sex if I"m not thinking about having it".


You tried to convince her to have sex with you by telling her that the very "fact" that you two were talking about sex means YOU TWO should have sex with each other.


Like it's automatic or something.





Women have sex based on their emotions.


You're trying to get her to have sex with you based on the "fact"..."fact"...."fact".....based on the "fact" that you two talked about sex.




You don't generate sexual feelings in women with facts,data,and information.

was forcing things. but I did it to let her know that I don´t want her as a friend

Yeah,you sure did. But you did it logically by EXPLAINING TO HER your "concept" or "idea" of you talking about sex with a girl means you want to have sex with that girl.


And you did an excellent job of explaining it to her.


Now here's my question....


Where's the attraction? The busting,the teasing,the negging?



Where's the fun and having a good time to stir up her feelings?


Surely you didn't think that little "lecture" you gave her caused any feelings or emotions in her,did you??? :crackup:

there was one time when I said to her "you can spect any thing from me except Lies"

I don´t want her to see me as a friend an put her trust in me when I just want to **** her :- /

Alright,let me se if I understand this correctly...

You don't want her to see you as a friend and put her trust in you.


You don't want her to put her trust in you,YET you told her "you can spect anything from me except lies".


You don't want her putting her trust in you,but you told her you'll never lie to her.

Ohhhh...K.

some of you say "walk away" but I don`t know what do I let her know with this what I comunicate with this?

I understand what you were trying to do,but you went WAAAY off in left field somewhere trying to do it....and I'm sorry,but her feeling and emotions can't just sat idle until you realize what you did wrong and correct yourself.




More than likely,it's too late. It's over with.


You're in the friendzone.

You are.



You might as well just move on to girls who are interested in you...and don't deceive yourself.


She WILL call you again and text you again as well,but NOT because she likes you,but because you're her "friend".





It is what it is man. I'd stop wasting time trying to chase her,and figure out what it was that caused you to get friendzone here.




That way you'll be able to avoid it the next time you meet a girl you like.

 

[JEFE]

trust

Alright,let me se if I understand this correctly...

You don't want her to see you as a friend and put her trust in you.


You don't want her to put her trust in you,YET you told her "you can spect anything from me except lies".


You don't want her putting her trust in you,but you told her you'll never lie to her.

Ohhhh...K.




I understand what you were trying to do,but you went WAAAY off in left field somewhere trying to do it....and I'm sorry,but her feeling and emotions can't just sat idle until you realize what you did wrong and correct yourself.

I think that I don`t explain my self correctly

when I say I don´t want her to put her trust in Me I mean "her trust in me as a confident, some one who she can vomit her emotion about other men,

I want her for sex and sex only

if I`m in the friend zone, I prefer to lose that, and don`t decive her.

I apreciate your opinion man, you seem to "get it"

 

[JEFE]

Coool off

I`m going to leave her alone for a week to cool of things a little.

 

[Igetit!]

I`m going to leave her alone for a week to cool of things a little.

Let things cool off? What things?


And I understood what you meant by her putting her "trust" in you.


I knew you meant her trusting you as a "girlfriend",someone she can tell all her secrets and problems to.


I understood that.




You said that you don't want to be someone she can come to and "vomit all her emotions about other men" to.




I get that. Now here's something you don't seem to understand....



you're ALREADY THAT GUY.




That's why I said it was too late. Whatever you did from the beginning when you first met her is what got you here.





Come on dude. She told you she slept with a guy who's 33,even though she has a boyfriend who's 25,didn't she?

She's ALREADY talking to you about other guys.





You said that you two were telling each other "stories",sexual stories,and in the middle of doing this,you told her she was making you "hot".

And what did she say to that?




She said she was telling you all those things because you're her FRIEND...and she's right. That's what friends do.



You don't get it. You spent ALL THIS TIME talking and getting close EMOTIONALLY with her,telling each other intimate details about each other.





Well tell me this....did you ever ask her out? I mean EVER ask her out,and particularly in the beginning,within the first 2 to 3 days of knowing her.





Did you ever talk about the TWO OF YOU? You know,plural pronouns,"we","us","our"?




Did you ever show any sexual interest in her,or did you just "talk" about sex?




I don't know what you're expecting to happen by letting a week pass without contacting her.


Missing someone and being sexually attracted to someone are TWO DIFFERENT THINGS.





You go a week without contacting her or speaking to her,and she'll MISS YOU. She'll miss you because she won't have heard from her "friend" in a while.





If you think going 7 days of not speaking to her will erase the past 2 or 3 months of "friendly" feelings she's developed for you,well have at it man.

 

[JEFE]

You said that you two were telling each other "stories",sexual stories,and in the middle of doing this,you told her she was making you "hot".

And what did she say to that?

She said she was telling you all those things because you're her FRIEND...and she's right. That's what friends do.

that`s ****ed up man, I didn´t tell her that she was making me hot.... I wanted to but didn`t thats what make me angry the most.

I`m thinking in put my mind in other things (girls) and quit wasting my time in this girl.

but I have to know....... how ****ed up the things are and if they are, then is better that she tells me, and that will be the kick in the ass that I need