Taking a 23yr old girls virginity? (Pros vs Cons)

[l e g e n d a r y]

OK guys heres the situation: I'm 27, I met this girl, shes 23, and have chilled with her once or twice a month since the summer (I'm very busy with work, friends, hooking up with another girl, making money, etc. lol) Honestly this girl is not very important to me. However she is REALLY into me and has a great body, which makes me think she could fit into my life as a friends with benefits situation (which is all I offer girls anyway).
Now we were hooking up and about to do it, when she mentioned she was a virgin, and she still wanted to go ahead anyway. I kinda freaked out because I've never been with a virgin before. Immediately images of her being a Stage 5 Clinger flashed through my mind (like the redhead in Wedding Crashers haha). It came as a shock because of her age, but guys I need some advice here, do you think the risk of a possible clinger is worth the reward of a potential friends w benefits????

Any thoughts/comments/advice from guys who have taken a 20somethings virginity would be appreciated!!!

 

[jafyk]

Well, if yo are trying to be fair to her then I would say go ahead and let her know that you are not looking for anything serious. That you may also be concerned that she might get attached to you since you would be her first....Anyway, this here is your disclaimer. So, should she say she's ok with it do go ahead.

I can't say I've really had a clinger or that I couldn't get rid of one. Most times when I stop putting an effort into a relationship it tends to die. So, I guess if you do do anything with her and you stop being proactive she may eventually break it off with you (you both slowly drift apart). In my experience I had a 19 or 20 yrs old about a year or two ago who was a virgin. I was reluctant in getting physical with her. She wanted it and said she was ready so I obliged. We ended up being fwb for a while. She wasn't clingy (she barely texted me or called), when we called and texted it was to meet up and when we met up we knew what was gonna happen. This went on for about 6 months till she wanted a title for our relationship. I could've lied to her and told her she was my gf while being with other girls on the side as some guys do but I believe in being fair with people. I told her I didn't feel that way being in a bf/gf relationship. She kept messing with me hoping that I would change my mind but when I still refused for us to have that title she stopped seeing me and eventually she now hates me. Do I feel bad? No, because I believe I was honest with her. I don't see what us having a title would've changed. We hung out, did it and even did other social activities. Why must we have a title and honestly I can't be in a committed relationship with a girl whom I didn't find that attractive and who was boring. Anyway, that's my story. Make of it what you may. When they say they are virgins it's not always true.

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear Legend,
Having seen a few Women in their thirties who are still "Intacto",I think you would be doing this girl a service by taking the bow off it...as they get older it becomes more and more of an impediment.

 

[samspade]

They're all potential clingers....you just have to handle it right. Don't freak out about her virginity - forget all that. She wants to have sex with you, bottom line. Hey, you're a great guy - why wouldn't she? Give her a first time she'll always remember with a smile.

 

[seth03]

i guess in the end its up to her but i just wouldnt want to deal with the karma of taking a girls virginity if you knew you were just gonna look at her has a FWB type deal. Since im in med school, i only screw chicks on a FWB basis (no point in committing to something now if im gonna be rich in 10 years and and can get something better). However if I ran into a virgin id for sure tell her what was up very clearly, and even if she still agreed i am not sure if id do it. I guess if i knew for sure some other dufus was gonna take it anyway, i'd go ahead and do it.

 

[L B]

Do it. You don't want her to be a 30 year old virgin later. Sacrifice your body for the benefit of her happiness.

 

[st_99]

Like samspade said, ANY girl could be a possible clinger so that
shouldn't be a factor. Just do it. If you want.

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear Legend,
You see some guys are like Seth,are already talking about Karma,whatever that means to him it is not going to help her....One of my Plates friends is a 42?year old Chinese Virgin,still intacto...what a problem that has been for her and her new found Man....She has built herself up to such a frenzy of expectations(not all good,as she fears the pain involved)...
No man,let alone the fat introverted IT Nerd she has found could ever satisfy her expectations,she is bound to be disapointed...When asked I suggested the best way out,was a good Gigolo,a Gyno or a friend of mine who has no scruples....
The longer you leave it,the harder it will become to part with,and the greater the Buyer regret,the latter,and the association of her lover with any pain involved, is the reason that I suggested a surrogate Lover...But Guys,this can be found amongst Men too,I first heard of an example only this year.
The guy in question a 28 year old Scot,always lived with his mother...on coming to Australia,he hooked up with a Lady,found he didn't know what to do,experienced a humiliating failure.....
This Man was a fine looking specimen 6 foot two,well built,a dancer and an athlete....
He went to a trick Cyclist as part of a counselling program that his work place ordered for him after he experienced Clinical Depression...
To cut a long story short,a surrogate Lover was organised a little after this he met an obliging Asian girl,and started a long term relationship,which ended when he died after a long illness.....Seems he never got past a once monthly routine,which drove her crazy....It takes All kinds Legend!