Take the high road? or expose her

[Londonman09]

Hey so long story short... been seeing this girl I work with for about 5 months. She has a boyfriend and had flipped flopped back and forth between what she wanted. I decided to stop being a ***** and told her I was gone unless she made a choice.. She ignored me for a week, came back and tried to be chatty and friendly again and I told her again I didn't want to hear from her unless she figured her **** out. She told me off. So i deleted her off FB, and stopped talking. Well 20 minutes after I deleted her off FB she freaks out about not wanting to lose me.

Over the next week, she told her parents about me, they never liked boyfriend told her to talk to boyfriend about it. She tells me shes afraid of love, and thats why it was so easy to stay with the boyfriend, no deep feelings but things are so easy she knows she wont get hurt. BUT has made the choice to end things, sees us together, talks about our future. Sent me a you tube video of a wedding etc... Asks if I'm ok getting rid of this other girl that I was quasi seeing.. I was skeptical at first, but bit hook line and sinker. 100% in. Unfortunately absolutely in love with this damn hoe. I said to her too... you know your boyfriend will fight for you? She said.. well I think you will fight harder. Trouble. Anyways so she goes to break up with him.. and he cries, begs for a second chance, she decides to give him it. Tells me I will be the first to know if it doesnt work out. HAHA. I basically told her dont worry about it.. It wont matter. Shes playing the victim now, saying shes heart broken, and I dont understand.. and after three years she owes it to him to give him a chance. He promised her vacations over the holidays.. to change. She told him there was another man in the picture, but did not tell him we have been screwing like rabbits for 5 months. he promised to be everything I was to her and more.. and to try and be more the guy she wants.. etc etc.. So she tells me to walk. after 5 months of flip flop I should have known better.. but what a heartless woman to beg me to come back, build me up... only to crush me a week later.

Complicating things worse.. we work together. And the guy guessed it was me, and she admitted it. So the xmas party in a month should be interesting.

My question... i'm hurting pretty bad now.. she played me for a fool, and seems to hope ill just wait around for her to decide if the boyfriend can be what she wants.. She tried to claim she was only worried about others, and not herself.. yet this is very selfish. Yes I am a bad person for getting involved with a woman who had a boyfriend, but its been a long year and half of us talking and being friends and things just happened and went out of control. Do I call the boyfriend and set him straight? Shes lieing to one of us.. either she loves him, or she doesnt. I think he deserves to know shes been screwing around and telling me all these things so he can compare notes. Do I call him and tell him? or do I just walk away.

 

[SgtSplacker]

She just might have you two decide who the victor is between yourselves. Be careful at that party, don't drink too much while he is there. Don't go walking about by yourself. Don't eat too much. Stay with your friends. Don't wear anything that you don't want to loose or can't mess up. Always keep him in front of you. Check if hes pointing you out to his friends. At a Xmas party he should be with his lady, if hes with his friends more hes building camaraderie with them to jump you later. Be careful where you park if your taking your car. Stay within visible range of security. If you see him staying till the end of the party be careful. If you see him clocking you be careful. Go ready to scrap because it's ON.

Remember he is in the right and you are in the wrong, it's easy to rally help when you are in the right.

Oh and she's lying about that no emotional ties to her BF crap...

And don't call that guy man! What are you crazy? You think he's going to want to be civil with you and compare notes?! really!!? I would ask you to meet me somewhere to "talk it out" and beat you to the ground as soon as I saw you. Unless he is a total wimpy chump sauce that is...

 

[Mike32ct]

The late Jophil told us and I paraphrase, "It doesn't usually end well for the third person entering a love triangle.". I can't agree more.

Just quit while you're ahead (ie behind) and walk away. NOTHING good will come fron telling the bf, only some potentially really bad stuff.

By the way, odds are like 95% that she never breaks up with the bf for you. "It's ok to cheat because I'm going to break up with him" is oldest trick in the book.

Notwithstanding, a lot women get very sick gina tingly pleasure from two men fighting over her, especially if it turns physical.

I agree with the precautions Sgt mentioned. Also keep some distance. Don't let him talk to you (ie vent) when he is right in your face. It can be a sucker punch trap.

 

[Londonman09]

She just might have you two decide who the victor is between yourselves. Be careful at that party, don't drink too much while he is there. Don't go walking about by yourself. Don't eat too much. Stay with your friends. Don't wear anything that you don't want to loose or can't mess up. Always keep him in front of you. Check if hes pointing you out to his friends. At a Xmas party he should be with his lady, if hes with his friends more hes building camaraderie with them to jump you later. Be careful where you park if your taking your car. Stay within visible range of security. If you see him staying till the end of the party be careful. If you see him clocking you be careful. Go ready to scrap because it's ON.

Remember he is in the right and you are in the wrong, it's easy to rally help when you are in the right.

Oh and she's lying about that no emotional ties to her BF crap...

And don't call that guy man! What are you crazy? You think he's going to want to be civil with you and compare notes?! really!!? I would ask you to meet me somewhere to "talk it out" and beat you to the ground as soon as I saw you. Unless he is a total wimpy chump sauce that is...

I saw the forum below asking the same questions and read the responses down there.. funny how many trashy women there are.

But you are right.. I cant call him. I'm much bigger that him, but I don't want to fight anyone either. Not wise to call him.

 

[Iceberg]

I think he deserves to know shes been screwing around and telling me all these things so he can compare notes. Do I call him and tell him? or do I just walk away.

Eh. Let's be honest for a minute. You don't give two sh*ts about what he deserves.

Now that we got that out of the way....

She played you for a fool? Nah. You played yourself for a fool. You got emotional over a girl who should have been nothing more than a steady supply of sex. That's your fault. You knew who this girl was. You knew what her situation was. And you knew the possible consequences.

And every time she gave you an out, you went back to her anyway.

I'm not saying that this girl is right. I'm just saying that it's your life, and you put yourself in the position to be hurt by a girl who was extremely likely to hurt you.

How did you see this playing out?....you two staying together in a stable, healthy relationship, holding hands, skipping through strawberry fields?

Vent to us. Go jog or lift weights. But don't take the revenge path. Your revenge will come a year from now when you see she's still with her weak boyfriend, and you've moved onto better things. That's revenge. Improving yourself to never allow yourself to be so foolish again.

 

[Londonman09]

Eh. Let's be honest for a minute. You don't give two sh*ts about what he deserves.

Now that we got that out of the way....

She played you for a fool? Nah. You played yourself for a fool. You got emotional over a girl who should have been nothing more than a steady supply of sex. That's your fault. You knew who this girl was. You knew what her situation was. And you knew the possible consequences.

And every time she gave you an out, you went back to her anyway.

I'm not saying that this girl is right. I'm just saying that it's your life, and you put yourself in the position to be hurt by a girl who was extremely likely to hurt you.

How did you see this playing out?....you two staying together in a stable, healthy relationship, holding hands, skipping through strawberry fields?

Vent to us. Go jog or lift weights. But don't take the revenge path. Your revenge will come a year from now when you see she's still with her weak boyfriend, and you've moved onto better things. That's revenge. Improving yourself to never allow yourself to be so foolish again.

Yea... sad thing is I knew/know all these things.. and I suppose I did see things playing out like that.

guess you need to trust your gut feelings eh

 

[Londonman09]

Why would you want to be serious with a cheating wh0re?
Why would you give her another chance?


No matter what you think may happen when you tell this guy about her cheating, he will not "side with you". Nor will he leave her. You are only endangering yourself.

Do like ice says and walk away. Leave people to suffer the consequences of their own actions.

No second chance... when she told me that I would be the first to know if things didn't work out, I laughed at her and said don't bother I wont be waiting by the phone.