Take Back Your Power!
- Thread starter Señor Fingers
- Start date
Lost
Master Don Juan
i didnt have a problem until this part. Sure we can turn our TV off.. but its not like it ONLY comes from the tv.. or ONLY comes from movies. in my school its TAUGHT.. not by stupid little girls but by the TEACHERS. Yes we get grades dependent on it.
George Gordon
Banned
Dominate Yourself
“She has the power.” “No, he has the power.” “Who has the power?” Who cares! Could it be that what we’re really trying to discuss and get a hold of here is INTEGRITY? Embracing our personal commitments to ourselves, and growing into our souls to find our authenticity?
That seems to be the undercurrent.
I don’t think that women want a man who has ‘External Power’ (though that exists on a very primal level) as much as a man who has INNER INTEGRITY and is AUTHENTIC.
The focus should be on DOMINATING YOURSELF! And even though ‘power struggles’ do exist (during stages of a grand process), I don’t see the reason why a person would even consider that their business, because the focus should be on: What you allow yourself to receive, and what you allow yourself to give.
I don’t think its so much that women would prefer a man that dominates them, as a man that dominates himself. Women reflect; they follow integral leads. (Of course, they’d sooner go with a man that dominates them than a man that submits to them.)
It seems to me that people who seek power over other people, lack the power—the integrity—over themselves. Yet they continue to arm themselves with weapons that further mask themselves, pushing their personal power further and further away from themselves. Pushing themselves further away from themselves by trying to be something they’re not. Still, taking comfort in the ‘external power’ they exhibit, a place where they ‘feel’ secure. An illusion.
I’m not a seducer. Yet for the first year after finding this board, I convinced myself I was. Like a natural seducer needs an Internet forum. Tough lesson. Now I work from the inside, out. I don’t use ‘****y/funny’ solely because I want to attract women (it’s not a ‘seduction tactic’), but rather as a way (a 'tool') of asserting my boundaries, projecting my integrity. It’s a part of me, and it always was. After all ‘****y/funny’ is not a manmade technique; it’s inside all men. It’s the WILL and COURAGE conditioned with tact.
SEXUALITY is what is important! I think our notions of ‘power’ limit us from realizing that there is only strength and weakness. We have both. Women have both. Put man and woman together and you have all STRENGTH, then, you have TRUE POWER.
It seems to me that women who have the ‘power’ in the relationship ultimately have no ‘power’. And the women who have no ‘power’ in the relationship have ALL the power because sexuality radiates. However, ‘Lead’, I think, is a more accurate word.
Men and women perpetuate, and teach each other who the other is…
More later. I’ve had a weekend where it really hit me how far I am on the other side of the fence. I get it! I found myself at a woman’s apartment after an incredibly charged action date, only to find that she was in the process of standing up her boyfriend (which I was unaware of until then) who decided to drop by just as I was leaving, having waited at the pub for over an hour while his girlfriend and I were discovering an UNBELIEVABLE CONNECTION, and UNDERSTANDING. "What is going on here?" The answers will come.
I was planning on doing a post on what I learnt, though I think the fundamentals tie in with this thread. It’s simply an understanding, which will help you to maneuver around the social masks and beliefs that hinder the direct communication between two people. COURAGE and its baring on HUMILITY is CENTRAL. The search for our HUMANITY.
!GEORGE GORDON!
“She has the power.” “No, he has the power.” “Who has the power?” Who cares! Could it be that what we’re really trying to discuss and get a hold of here is INTEGRITY? Embracing our personal commitments to ourselves, and growing into our souls to find our authenticity?
That seems to be the undercurrent.
I don’t think that women want a man who has ‘External Power’ (though that exists on a very primal level) as much as a man who has INNER INTEGRITY and is AUTHENTIC.
The focus should be on DOMINATING YOURSELF! And even though ‘power struggles’ do exist (during stages of a grand process), I don’t see the reason why a person would even consider that their business, because the focus should be on: What you allow yourself to receive, and what you allow yourself to give.
I don’t think its so much that women would prefer a man that dominates them, as a man that dominates himself. Women reflect; they follow integral leads. (Of course, they’d sooner go with a man that dominates them than a man that submits to them.)
It seems to me that people who seek power over other people, lack the power—the integrity—over themselves. Yet they continue to arm themselves with weapons that further mask themselves, pushing their personal power further and further away from themselves. Pushing themselves further away from themselves by trying to be something they’re not. Still, taking comfort in the ‘external power’ they exhibit, a place where they ‘feel’ secure. An illusion.
I’m not a seducer. Yet for the first year after finding this board, I convinced myself I was. Like a natural seducer needs an Internet forum. Tough lesson. Now I work from the inside, out. I don’t use ‘****y/funny’ solely because I want to attract women (it’s not a ‘seduction tactic’), but rather as a way (a 'tool') of asserting my boundaries, projecting my integrity. It’s a part of me, and it always was. After all ‘****y/funny’ is not a manmade technique; it’s inside all men. It’s the WILL and COURAGE conditioned with tact.
SEXUALITY is what is important! I think our notions of ‘power’ limit us from realizing that there is only strength and weakness. We have both. Women have both. Put man and woman together and you have all STRENGTH, then, you have TRUE POWER.
It seems to me that women who have the ‘power’ in the relationship ultimately have no ‘power’. And the women who have no ‘power’ in the relationship have ALL the power because sexuality radiates. However, ‘Lead’, I think, is a more accurate word.
Men and women perpetuate, and teach each other who the other is…
More later. I’ve had a weekend where it really hit me how far I am on the other side of the fence. I get it! I found myself at a woman’s apartment after an incredibly charged action date, only to find that she was in the process of standing up her boyfriend (which I was unaware of until then) who decided to drop by just as I was leaving, having waited at the pub for over an hour while his girlfriend and I were discovering an UNBELIEVABLE CONNECTION, and UNDERSTANDING. "What is going on here?" The answers will come.
I was planning on doing a post on what I learnt, though I think the fundamentals tie in with this thread. It’s simply an understanding, which will help you to maneuver around the social masks and beliefs that hinder the direct communication between two people. COURAGE and its baring on HUMILITY is CENTRAL. The search for our HUMANITY.
!GEORGE GORDON!
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Ninja Dude
Senior Don Juan
Re: Re: Take Back Your Power!
Wow. What a thread. I was going to toss my 2 pence in but George Gordon stole my lines! (Why you!!)
Very thought provoking post, fingers. This one is getting saved in my personal archive.
5 Stars!!
Wow. What a thread. I was going to toss my 2 pence in but George Gordon stole my lines! (Why you!!)
Very thought provoking post, fingers. This one is getting saved in my personal archive.
5 Stars!!
I find this disturbing. How are you being taught to be AFC in school??! The closest thing to feminism I learned in school was about the womans rights movement and that women should be treated as professional equals as men. We never learned that woman are better or more powerful.
I can only repeat what the others said: Great Post Fingz!
gave me really something to think about...
To George: If the size of your signature is equal to the importance or insight of your message, you should definitely have made it bigger this time. To me it seems that you came close to the the core of understanding interaction with other people. I hope you write "more later"...
gave me really something to think about...
To George: If the size of your signature is equal to the importance or insight of your message, you should definitely have made it bigger this time. To me it seems that you came close to the the core of understanding interaction with other people. I hope you write "more later"...
Señor Fingers
Master Don Juan
Re: Dominate Yourself
Some of these girls seek to empower themselves by snagging a fellow who is perceived as dominant in the external realm. These girls are the spiritual gold-diggers..seeking nothing more than to usurp a man´s power for money, status or the esteem of her peers.
Of course everyone wants these things, but only an authentic woman can look past the superficial and truly appreciate an authentic man. She truly knows herself to the core and because of this, she is able to tap the very root of who he is. The rest of them only seek to devour the fruits of his integrity.
My game started to slump pretty badly until I realized I was making it into a chore instead of an enjoyable experience. I think this is one of the conduits through which we express our authenticity, the ability to let go and simply enjoy ourselves!
Having said that, I think one of the most valuable lessons a woman is specifically equipped to teach you is that individuality is an illusion. The times I have really come to understand this was with a woman, experiencing simultaneous orgasms that made the whole world disappear, along with the distinction between the two of us.
I feel like this is what real marriage is all about. Not a bunch of sterile documents approved by the government, but the union of two souls, whose physical connection is merely a catalyst to a more spiritual one.
Got any lines/patterns for me GG?
Depends on the woman and what her agenda is.
Some of these girls seek to empower themselves by snagging a fellow who is perceived as dominant in the external realm. These girls are the spiritual gold-diggers..seeking nothing more than to usurp a man´s power for money, status or the esteem of her peers.
Of course everyone wants these things, but only an authentic woman can look past the superficial and truly appreciate an authentic man. She truly knows herself to the core and because of this, she is able to tap the very root of who he is. The rest of them only seek to devour the fruits of his integrity.
Yup. This was me after I discovered this site. For many months I had succeeded in the assassination of my own character in favor of an improved, "suaver" version. The irony of it all is that I managed to alienate many girls by being too smooth! DOH!
My game started to slump pretty badly until I realized I was making it into a chore instead of an enjoyable experience. I think this is one of the conduits through which we express our authenticity, the ability to let go and simply enjoy ourselves!
So crucial to understand. This is our responsibilty as men. To take her hand and show her what you are made of on this dancefloor called life. She is probably an amazing dancer herself but you will never know until you take the initiative.
Beautifully said, but I think this is not exclusive to seduction. Your friends and family are also your teachers in this respect...
Having said that, I think one of the most valuable lessons a woman is specifically equipped to teach you is that individuality is an illusion. The times I have really come to understand this was with a woman, experiencing simultaneous orgasms that made the whole world disappear, along with the distinction between the two of us.
I feel like this is what real marriage is all about. Not a bunch of sterile documents approved by the government, but the union of two souls, whose physical connection is merely a catalyst to a more spiritual one.
Kickass! We have a new technique! C&H (Courage and Humility)
Got any lines/patterns for me GG?
Spike_the_cowboy
Master Don Juan
Great post!
Personally, I get sick of all the whining. Self pity won't get me anywhere I wanna' be, so I don't do it~
Sitcoms and so called 'reality' shows bl@w donkey d!ck. But I still like a good anime now and then.
I was raised without television, so I don't really have a problem with it. I'd much prefer a nice hike, working my Jeet Kune Do, or some fine HB P*$$y.
Personally, I get sick of all the whining. Self pity won't get me anywhere I wanna' be, so I don't do it~
Sitcoms and so called 'reality' shows bl@w donkey d!ck. But I still like a good anime now and then.
I was raised without television, so I don't really have a problem with it. I'd much prefer a nice hike, working my Jeet Kune Do, or some fine HB P*$$y.
You're shining the spotlight on an absolutely ESSENTIAL ingredient to happiness and self-confidence. Discovering the fact that one can CHOOSE whether or not to accept the role of victim is what transformed me into an optimistic person and really jump-started me on my path to my ideal self.
When I was an AFC, my attitude was poisonous...
That's just wonderful. I got rejected again! Damn I must really suck ass. WHY ME? WHY WAS I BORN INTO THIS HIDEOUS BODY? WHY DON'T GIRLS LIKE ME?
After my one-itus quest failed, I hit a breaking point and let out a gutteral howl of frustration. My anger and frustration led me to the belief that I MUST do something to improve my situation; I was no longer satisfied with being a victim. That's when I found Sosuave, started working out, and began to take back the power that had been slowly pick-pocketed from me.
Fingers, feel free to refer back to personal experience-- personally, I profit from other people's experiences as I'm sure a lot of others do, too.
I too have discovered that the purpose of the shyt test is not,
"Hm, let's see how much I can beat him down and weild my power over him! Mwahahahaha!"
It's more, "Let's see if he'll allow me to walk all over him, or if he'll BE A MAN and put me in my place (what she wants). I wonder if all of this confidence is real, or if he'll become a big ***** when things don't go according to plan."
They just want to make sure that you are an assertive man... that's all.
Last week, I made plans with an HB(Sarah for those reading my Duke Progress Journal) to meet up on Saturday at 7:00.
Friday I catch her online and remind her to bring some money to buy me a birthday present. Her response: "I've been meaning to talk to you about that. I didn't think you were serious."
Didn't think I was serious?? WTF! I set a definite time on Saturday to meet up and she tries to pull this shyt on me.
I called her out on her shyt.
Me:" We agreed like 3 days earlier, you could have called me. I just got off the phone with somebody else and already made plans since you flaked."
She accepted responsibility and thought I was angry with her, but I assured here I had no hard feelings, and that everything was cool... (not spinning out of control, just being assertive).
It was the first time I ever really stepped up to the plate with her and TOOK MY POWER BACK. How did she respond? "I'm getting back at 1:00 PM next Saturday. Saturday we are doing something! Got that?" (again she tries to siphon my power)
Me: "No, my hearing is shot. What? Say again. Make sure you take a shower before we meet up, because I don't want any Clay-germs on you (she's gonna go see that flamer Clay Aiken in concert)."
Which proves another one of Fingers' points-- they want to be dominated. If you don't dominate her, she will dominate you! You or her? It's your choice since you're tha man!
Being a man is awesome. Imagine that you want to play a board-game with a girl. Since you're the man, you tell the girl, "Do you want to play Checkers, Chess, or Tic-Tac-Toe?" She SELECTS which game to play, but her options are limited to the ones you have created for her. So you KNOW that you will play one of the games that you like. Her only other alternative is to choose to NOT play the board-game with you at all-- in which case you detach your ego from the situation and find another playmate.
Imagine HER situation! She has to wait...and wait...and wait...She could be BURNING with desire to play Checkers, but she has to sit there and drool on herself until somebody asks her if she wants to play Checkers.
Now you-- the MAN... Let's say YOU want to play checkers. All you have to do is get off your ass and invite someone to play with you. Simple.
Nice discussion, fellas, I am enjoying the EXCHANGE
When I was an AFC, my attitude was poisonous...
That's just wonderful. I got rejected again! Damn I must really suck ass. WHY ME? WHY WAS I BORN INTO THIS HIDEOUS BODY? WHY DON'T GIRLS LIKE ME?
After my one-itus quest failed, I hit a breaking point and let out a gutteral howl of frustration. My anger and frustration led me to the belief that I MUST do something to improve my situation; I was no longer satisfied with being a victim. That's when I found Sosuave, started working out, and began to take back the power that had been slowly pick-pocketed from me.
Fingers, feel free to refer back to personal experience-- personally, I profit from other people's experiences as I'm sure a lot of others do, too.
I too have discovered that the purpose of the shyt test is not,
"Hm, let's see how much I can beat him down and weild my power over him! Mwahahahaha!"
It's more, "Let's see if he'll allow me to walk all over him, or if he'll BE A MAN and put me in my place (what she wants). I wonder if all of this confidence is real, or if he'll become a big ***** when things don't go according to plan."
They just want to make sure that you are an assertive man... that's all.
Last week, I made plans with an HB(Sarah for those reading my Duke Progress Journal) to meet up on Saturday at 7:00.
Friday I catch her online and remind her to bring some money to buy me a birthday present. Her response: "I've been meaning to talk to you about that. I didn't think you were serious."
Didn't think I was serious?? WTF! I set a definite time on Saturday to meet up and she tries to pull this shyt on me.
I called her out on her shyt.
Me:" We agreed like 3 days earlier, you could have called me. I just got off the phone with somebody else and already made plans since you flaked."
She accepted responsibility and thought I was angry with her, but I assured here I had no hard feelings, and that everything was cool... (not spinning out of control, just being assertive).
It was the first time I ever really stepped up to the plate with her and TOOK MY POWER BACK. How did she respond? "I'm getting back at 1:00 PM next Saturday. Saturday we are doing something! Got that?" (again she tries to siphon my power)
Me: "No, my hearing is shot. What? Say again. Make sure you take a shower before we meet up, because I don't want any Clay-germs on you (she's gonna go see that flamer Clay Aiken in concert)."
Which proves another one of Fingers' points-- they want to be dominated. If you don't dominate her, she will dominate you! You or her? It's your choice since you're tha man!
Being a man is awesome. Imagine that you want to play a board-game with a girl. Since you're the man, you tell the girl, "Do you want to play Checkers, Chess, or Tic-Tac-Toe?" She SELECTS which game to play, but her options are limited to the ones you have created for her. So you KNOW that you will play one of the games that you like. Her only other alternative is to choose to NOT play the board-game with you at all-- in which case you detach your ego from the situation and find another playmate.
Imagine HER situation! She has to wait...and wait...and wait...She could be BURNING with desire to play Checkers, but she has to sit there and drool on herself until somebody asks her if she wants to play Checkers.
Now you-- the MAN... Let's say YOU want to play checkers. All you have to do is get off your ass and invite someone to play with you. Simple.
Nice discussion, fellas, I am enjoying the EXCHANGE
theSpeculator
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Dec 16, 2004
- Messages
- 245
- Reaction score
- 0
Senor Finger;
Don't be too harst on people and society. It is not entirely their fault. Society has created many "drones" still plug into the "Matrix". (Yes the moive Matrix is a perfect metaphor to our society and its citizen. Where the machine symbolizes society)
And there are only a few lucky ones that have been able to see the light that shines through the fog that is society. They are the ones that will become the leaders of tomorrow. As a leader, their job is to not create followers, but to create more leaders. That is a true leader's job, to makes more leaders.
My vision of a True Don Juan is that he is a true leader. His extreme leadership and charisma is what gravitates chicks toward him. Not his techniques, not his trick, not his looks.
That will be one of the goal of Project T. To makes real Leaders and in the process, simultaneously making him more attractive to girls.
Senor Finger, if you are reading this (I know you are busy with your CD); because of your great insights and excellent posts in the past', I am inviting you to participate in Project T.
Don't be too harst on people and society. It is not entirely their fault. Society has created many "drones" still plug into the "Matrix". (Yes the moive Matrix is a perfect metaphor to our society and its citizen. Where the machine symbolizes society)
And there are only a few lucky ones that have been able to see the light that shines through the fog that is society. They are the ones that will become the leaders of tomorrow. As a leader, their job is to not create followers, but to create more leaders. That is a true leader's job, to makes more leaders.
My vision of a True Don Juan is that he is a true leader. His extreme leadership and charisma is what gravitates chicks toward him. Not his techniques, not his trick, not his looks.
That will be one of the goal of Project T. To makes real Leaders and in the process, simultaneously making him more attractive to girls.
Senor Finger, if you are reading this (I know you are busy with your CD); because of your great insights and excellent posts in the past', I am inviting you to participate in Project T.
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both of you...'manoMan' and 'senor fingers' are right. you are both saying the same things its just that you're frames are different. 'manoman's is somewhat of a negative frame and senor fingers was slightly more positive...but you two were like two sides of the same coin. its funny how you were missing that.
just listen to the wendy williams show's advice hour on 107.5 WBLS..and you will hear the mentality that women my age (23+-) have. in a way it is like war...and like a dance. well to me, war and dance are almost the same thing.
just listen to the wendy williams show's advice hour on 107.5 WBLS..and you will hear the mentality that women my age (23+-) have. in a way it is like war...and like a dance. well to me, war and dance are almost the same thing.
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tmpgstx
Master Don Juan
Women are the natural selectors of who they wish to mate with. She does the choosing.
From my experience and with people i know, it is better to let the girl chase you. If she is an HB10 (with some brains), and is goal oriented/likes a challenge - by all means, let her do the chasing.
Put it this way, if you have to work for a girl, then it isn't worth it! She does the choosing, and if her choice had to be by diplomatic means (you talking her into dating you) - then there isn't going to be much passion from her end.
I also think you can do something nice for her, that you would do for most anyone in the beginning (more specificly later). She may just appreciate it, and think you're sweet - so long as it's not overdone. It shows you have caring and attentive qualities.
From my experience and with people i know, it is better to let the girl chase you. If she is an HB10 (with some brains), and is goal oriented/likes a challenge - by all means, let her do the chasing.
Put it this way, if you have to work for a girl, then it isn't worth it! She does the choosing, and if her choice had to be by diplomatic means (you talking her into dating you) - then there isn't going to be much passion from her end.
I also think you can do something nice for her, that you would do for most anyone in the beginning (more specificly later). She may just appreciate it, and think you're sweet - so long as it's not overdone. It shows you have caring and attentive qualities.
thecraftylefty
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Aug 20, 2001
- Messages
- 417
- Reaction score
- 7
Power, or in other words control. To have power over a conversation, approach, or whatever situation you happen to be in shouldn't even be a question. You are/should always in control of yourself, which is the most important thing of all, whether you realize it or not.
Take the word confidence. The dictionary definition is different than the words I would use to decribe it. The point? You can choose to live by how people before you have lived (and defined life), or you can blaze a new path that hasn't been walked before. A one of new, fresh, and invigorating ideas. Define your own life in every aspect. Leave nothing unquestioned.
Despite all the influences television, movies, society, and media have, we still have a brain that is supposed to filter out the bad and keep the good. The good is what's here. Even if you see the bad and grow up with it there's no real reason to let it grow inside your mind. Get a reality check. Read, think, educate yourself, and make your own decisions.
And remember, you're always in control unless you LET someone else do the decision making for you.
thecraftylefty
Take the word confidence. The dictionary definition is different than the words I would use to decribe it. The point? You can choose to live by how people before you have lived (and defined life), or you can blaze a new path that hasn't been walked before. A one of new, fresh, and invigorating ideas. Define your own life in every aspect. Leave nothing unquestioned.
Despite all the influences television, movies, society, and media have, we still have a brain that is supposed to filter out the bad and keep the good. The good is what's here. Even if you see the bad and grow up with it there's no real reason to let it grow inside your mind. Get a reality check. Read, think, educate yourself, and make your own decisions.
And remember, you're always in control unless you LET someone else do the decision making for you.
That says it all fellas.
thecraftylefty
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Interesting post. What's amusing is that the people arguing with you end up agreeing with you by accident lol!
In regards to "dealing with the hand you're dealt" - The only bad thing about my hand is that I have the two of hearts in it. She's got a boyfreind.
Great post though.
In regards to "dealing with the hand you're dealt" - The only bad thing about my hand is that I have the two of hearts in it. She's got a boyfreind.
Great post though.
Deadly_Assassin
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Jul 8, 2003
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- 549
- Reaction score
- 4
- Age
- 42
man thats an awesome post, tell me more about this women
backbreaker
Master Don Juan
The Fox and the Grapes
One hot summer’s day a Fox was strolling through an orchard till he came to a bunch of Grapes just ripening on a vine which had been trained over a lofty branch. ‘Just the thing to quench my thirst,’ quoth he. Drawing back a few paces, he took a run and a jump, and just missed the bunch. Turning round again with a One, Two, Three, he jumped up, but with no greater success. Again and again he tried after the tempting morsel, but at last had to give it up, and walked away with his nose in the air, saying: ‘I am sure they are sour.’
It is easy to despise what you cannot get
- Aesop's Fables
One hot summer’s day a Fox was strolling through an orchard till he came to a bunch of Grapes just ripening on a vine which had been trained over a lofty branch. ‘Just the thing to quench my thirst,’ quoth he. Drawing back a few paces, he took a run and a jump, and just missed the bunch. Turning round again with a One, Two, Three, he jumped up, but with no greater success. Again and again he tried after the tempting morsel, but at last had to give it up, and walked away with his nose in the air, saying: ‘I am sure they are sour.’
It is easy to despise what you cannot get
- Aesop's Fables
