"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Take a lady on a hike

A

AJ84

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It's a bit different. If you met a guy once and then he asked you to come to a wedding with you and then a birthday party after two drinks an an appetizer, you wouldn't find that a little, well, strange?
I would see it as a person who has social commitments that he doesn’t want to cancel but would also like to see me. Yes, the venue would be weird but the intention is not.
Again, it’s a comfort zone thing. Is her friend’s bday party an ideal first date? No. But if you risk annoying her with declining and counter offering two invites, then you risk losing her interests so it’s trying to find a way to meet her half way. The wedding no ( could be open bar though lol but yeah too weird ), the bday party? Less weird.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Unisykolist

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What does one talk about on a hike? I used to ask myself the same questions. Based on my experience it doesn't matter if you're on a hike, in an elevator, or on the moon. The principles are the same. Go in there and speak your mind. Talk about your passions. Point out the tree next to you that looks like a giant penis. And if there is silence, let there be silence and show that you're okay with that.
 

HankHill

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So where does this stand, did you hear back from her?

I think the big part everyone's missing is that he's not as attracted to her as she is to him so he doesn't want to invest into it as much.
 

RickTheToad

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So where does this stand, did you hear back from her?

I think the big part everyone's missing is that he's not as attracted to her as she is to him so he doesn't want to invest into it as much.
I have attraction to her, maybe a 4 or a 5. She is educated and can hold a conversation it seems. However, she admitted that she's lonely, no family in the area (she lived with her mom but she went back to S. America to take care of a family member or something). She also said she had no friends, but then she's going to a friend's birthday party on Saturday? A bit strange. No?

Interestingly enough, she went dark for a few days, then she texted me a few minutes ago to invite me over to watch a movie (yes, I know what she may be suggesting. I always thought latin ladies from S. America were more conservative). The issue is that I already have plans with another lady. A bit perplexed. I do not exactly remember what she looked like body wise as it's been 2 weeks or so. This was why I suggested a hike. I've never had a person turn down a hike on a public trail.

Perhaps I am overthinking it. It just brings back memories years ago I went to a lady's house at her invitation and a knife was pulled on me. It was a pretty bad situation and as I disarmed the guy with an arm bar, another guy started to get involved. I threw one down the stairs and the other through a door in the hall. Cops were called and it was in the paper in Hartford, CT. I was briefly detained, and scolded by using excessive force, which I argued one of them had a huge knife and would had killed me. They then said, if my prints on that knife, I'd be in trouble, they weren't, but I was supposed to allow the person the right to back off and run away before defending myself. It seems one cannot even defend themselves anymore. I guess the problem was that both went to the hospital, and I just had some cuts and a torn shirt from the knife. It wasn't a fun experience. If it wasn't for the Captain, I would had stayed in a holding cell over that weekend. I digress. Yes, I know. I have trust issues.
 

RickTheToad

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I would see it as a person who has social commitments that he doesn’t want to cancel but would also like to see me. Yes, the venue would be weird but the intention is not.
Again, it’s a comfort zone thing. Is her friend’s bday party an ideal first date? No. But if you risk annoying her with declining and counter offering two invites, then you risk losing her interests so it’s trying to find a way to meet her half way. The wedding no ( could be open bar though lol but yeah too weird ), the bday party? Less weird.
Perhaps, but I do not feel it's appropriate to go to a place I know no one in Queens; the borough that I cannot stand. I am not concerned about losing her interest that much. Not the abundance mindset, it more that I do not like it when a lady comes on too hard; like the other two I posted. I am not a big drinker, but she is. On our date, I had one Corona, she had three drinks and two appetizers which bothered me a bit. To add insult to injury, she didn't even finish the food. I had a salad.

What does one talk about on a hike? I used to ask myself the same questions. Based on my experience it doesn't matter if you're on a hike, in an elevator, or on the moon. The principles are the same. Go in there and speak your mind. Talk about your passions. Point out the tree next to you that looks like a giant penis. And if there is silence, let there be silence and show that you're okay with that.
I like that. Not too sure if the ladies in this area would find that funny. They seem a bit stiff.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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HankHill

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I have attraction to her, maybe a 4 or a 5. She is educated and can hold a conversation it seems. However, she admitted that she's lonely, no family in the area (she lived with her mom but she went back to S. America to take care of a family member or something). She also said she had no friends, but then she's going to a friend's birthday party on Saturday? A bit strange. No?

Interestingly enough, she went dark for a few days, then she texted me a few minutes ago to invite me over to watch a movie (yes, I know what she may be suggesting. I always thought latin ladies from S. America were more conservative). The issue is that I already have plans with another lady. A bit perplexed. I do not exactly remember what she looked like body wise as it's been 2 weeks or so. This was why I suggested a hike. I've never had a person turn down a hike on a public trail.

Perhaps I am overthinking it. It just brings back memories years ago I went to a lady's house at her invitation and a knife was pulled on me. It was a pretty bad situation and as I disarmed the guy with an arm bar, another guy started to get involved. I threw one down the stairs and the other through a door in the hall. Cops were called and it was in the paper in Hartford, CT. I was briefly detained, and scolded by using excessive force, which I argued one of them had a huge knife and would had killed me. They then said, if my prints on that knife, I'd be in trouble, they weren't, but I was supposed to allow the person the right to back off and run away before defending myself. It seems one cannot even defend themselves anymore. I guess the problem was that both went to the hospital, and I just had some cuts and a torn shirt from the knife. It wasn't a fun experience. If it wasn't for the Captain, I would had stayed in a holding cell over that weekend. I digress. Yes, I know. I have trust issues.
I would tell her "That sounds nice but it's a bit of a short notice, how about [tomorrow/day after] instead?"
These days I'm more worried about the #MeToo stuff so proceed with caution since you don't really even know her.
 

RickTheToad

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I would tell her "That sounds nice but it's a bit of a short notice, how about [tomorrow/day after] instead?"
These days I'm more worried about the #MeToo stuff so proceed with caution since you don't really even know her.
I did ask her at the beginning of the week to pick a day, and she came back with a wedding and party this weekend plus an invitation. Guess she doesn't want a hike on Sunday. I just told her tonight is not going to work. She wants to do a movie night next week. I'm probably over thinking things. I do this when things seem too going my way. It's like me waiting for the proverbial next shoe to drop. I know someone posted to carry a recorder or something in my pocket. I'll pick one up at best buy. I hate walking on eggshells. I do not need any problems with the law. I have a government job, well two of them.
 
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