Supermarket Train wreck PU (FR)

[Chillisauce]

The following FR is mostly true (some exaggeration) and took place in a Brisbane (Australia) supermarket.

Mission: To kill my fear of approaching hot b1tches of 8.5 or up.

My room-mate and I were doing some shopping for the week, the usual being many cartons of eggs and some red meat., when in the other isle a stunning brunet appeared - tanned skin, very similar face to Angelina Jolie (in that reptile kind of way if you know what I mean)– an easy HB8, probably coming closer to HB9. I immediately felt my gut clench and got completely sucked into her reality.

Now, it so happens I’d recently read a thread from this board where a fellow did a banana approach on a HB in a supermarket and it seemed like a perfect opportunity had appeared to replicate it. My room-mate (who also happens to be my wing most of the time) gave me a few words of encouragement and stepped back.

I picked up two bananas, by this stage the little voice in my head was shouting WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! And made my way over to the girl. I broke out in a cold sweat and felt the need to clear my throat but pushed on. A tip sprang to mind, think of the worst possible outcome that can occur from an approach and you will realise its not so bad. The worst I could come up with was people laughing at me and her slapping me.

Completely oblivious to my approach she was selecting some kind of vegetable (hey, I’m an 18 year old male – if its green I probably don’t eat it) when a nervous ‘Hi’ came from behind her. She looked straight into my eyes and I gave her my Gunwitch 110% sexual state look, she seemed to reciprocate – Success! Then she noticed I was holding 2 different sized bananas near my groin and I said ‘Which one do you prefer?’

A flicker crossed her beautiful face, arousal maybe? She took a step closer, my heart beat faster and I think I stopped breathing. Bam!, I’m on the ground clutching my groin in a fetal position. The pain burnt like a thousand suns and I cried out. ( Think of your worst groin hit) Before I could recover she starts kicking me in the head (very hard), but thankfully my room-mate was there, he managed to stop the savage beast after about the 3rd or 4th kick. So far I have not noticed any problems down south but I did require 3 stitches in the back of my head from her pointy shoes.

End result – I STILL fear approaching hot women.

-Chillisauce

 

[iCY]

LOL

not really a good way to approach to get somewhere with a girl. but it WILL quickly kill off your fear of approaching.

hahaha awsome FR man

 

[Anomalous]

Originally posted by Chillisauce

End result – I STILL fear approaching hot women.

-Chillisauce

Yea but for a different reason.:crackup: :crackup: :crackup:

So you said you saw this banana approch before, well did i work for the other guy?

 

[Chillisauce]

I'll try and dredge a link up for you in the morning, he claimed it worked like a charm and boosted his confidence. I cant even pass this off to my friends as a 'pub fight wound'

 

[Life-Trainee]

I had a drunk chick punch me really hard in the stomach at a concert couple of months ago when I tried to kino her.

 

[Chillisauce]

Originally posted by Life-Trainee
I had a drunk chick punch me really hard in the stomach at a concert couple of months ago when I tried to kino her.

Hmm, next time we should really try and get the first hit in. Ah! a HB 9 *pounces from the shadows*

Heres the post that inspired me

'This was a long time ago in my AFC days. I was always the typical Nice Guy and was just fed up. A good friend of mine who is a natural with the ladies gave me some advice. He said "CS, you are way too nice my man. I mean you have pvssy written all over your face and trust me, thats not good! Do yourself a favor, be an assh*le for a day. Just one day say something really rude to a HB and get it out of your system. I know it sounds crazy but just try it!" His words were still ringin in my ears when I went shopping at the grocery store later on. I was contemplating this bizarre advice when I saw a hot-ass blonde make her way down the aisle (about a 7 face but 9 body with legs from here to yaya!) Anyways I scoped her out in the produce section and figured the opportunity was ripe (haha you like my clever writing skills! ) Anyway I walk up to her with two bananas. One small and one large. I say excuse me miss, but which one do you prefer as I hold each one over my dyck. She slaps me dead in the face so hard, I had a hand mark for hours afterwards! Okay so it wasn't really a success per se, but I have to say, my friend was right. From that day forward I had more balls than ever!'

 

[B-Lemond]

wrong post

 

[The Bad Ass Canadian]

Originally posted by Chillisauce
Hmm, next time we should really try and get the first hit in. Ah! a HB 9 *pounces from the shadows*

Heres the post that inspired me

'This was a long time ago in my AFC days. I was always the typical Nice Guy and was just fed up. A good friend of mine who is a natural with the ladies gave me some advice. He said "CS, you are way too nice my man. I mean you have pvssy written all over your face and trust me, thats not good! Do yourself a favor, be an assh*le for a day. Just one day say something really rude to a HB and get it out of your system. I know it sounds crazy but just try it!" His words were still ringin in my ears when I went shopping at the grocery store later on. I was contemplating this bizarre advice when I saw a hot-ass blonde make her way down the aisle (about a 7 face but 9 body with legs from here to yaya!) Anyways I scoped her out in the produce section and figured the opportunity was ripe (haha you like my clever writing skills! ) Anyway I walk up to her with two bananas. One small and one large. I say excuse me miss, but which one do you prefer as I hold each one over my dyck. She slaps me dead in the face so hard, I had a hand mark for hours afterwards! Okay so it wasn't really a success per se, but I have to say, my friend was right. From that day forward I had more balls than ever!'

hahahaha you took that as inspiration and decided to replicate it?

You are an idiot, plain and simple.


He got slapped, and you got kneed.

Can someone else try this and we'll see what his result is?

This is the dumbest thing I've read on here in a long time. Where do these guys come from?

 

[Docs]

She took a step closer, my heart beat faster and I think I stopped breathing. Bam!, I’m on the ground clutching my groin in a fetal position. The pain burnt like a thousand suns and I cried out. ( Think of your worst groin hit) Before I could recover she starts kicking me in the head (very hard)...

Kicking you in THE HEAD?? Holy ****...she's psycho, at least you know she's not for you :crackup: :crackup: :crackup:

 

[Chillisauce]

Originally posted by The Bad Ass Canadian
hahahaha you took that as inspiration and decided to replicate it?

You are an idiot, plain and simple.


He got slapped, and you got kneed.

Can someone else try this and we'll see what his result is?

This is the dumbest thing I've read on here in a long time. Where do these guys come from?

Well i believe it worked, my balls are at least twice the size now. (counting swelling)