Summer approach journal/advice please

[Exhumed]

I figure I'll use this thread to document any approaches I do throughout the summer. Most of these will take place at parties on weekends at my fraternity. I'm not living there over the summer but I plan to visit often. Summer is a great time to work game on incoming freshmen, because there are a lot of freshmen, few sophomores/juniors/seniors, and only a few of the fraternities stay open during summer.

A little background on me, I'm a virgin, relatively new to the game (I kissed a girl for the first time 2 years ago at the age of 17) but I've eliminated my severe social awkwardness, I'm well-versed in all the theory and whatnot, and I don't do anything wussy or needy with girls; I love girls but I consider them to be below me.

FR from this weekend
So, since Sunday marked the arrival of freshmen for summer session, the first party of the summer was on Sunday night. Though I wasn't really high at the time, I had been smoking weed all day (bad choice) so I was a bit tired, shy and unmotivated. By the end of the night I was pretty tired and drunk as well. My friend was with me for the weekend so he did most of the approaching, then I introduced myself and targeted a friend. He kept leaving to go outside and a smoke cigarette and then would come back and approach new girls, but he never followed through with any approach...I don't know why, he was being weird. Normally he's pretty good with girls. A 3-set of HB8s seemed pretty promising, as did a 2-set of a HB7 blonde and HB7 asian girl, but I wasn't on top of my game and found it difficult to carry on the conversation without my friend there to back me up. My friend later said he didn't want to carry on with the 2-set because, according to HB7 blonde's friend, they "weren't like that and would take weeks to hook up with," which makes me wish I had had the energy and motivation to prove him wrong. They're college girls now, and we're older than them, just WATCH how quickly they give it up. Oh well, next time.

What I learned:
--Don't smoke weed on the day leading up to a party; be energetic, and relatively sober (until I trust my game and confidence enough that drunkenness won't screw it up; I've found that it can hurt as much as it can help), get enough sleep, get some physical activity (which I did do)
--The cute freshman girls seemed attracted to me and I didn't get brutally rejected; good to keep in mind when I have bouts of approach anxiety, because I do have some approach anxiety, even if it's not a crippling fear

Questions:
--In your opinion, is it good to follow through with each set until hooking up or getting rejected occurs, or flirt it up with different sets of girls and then return to initial sets later on? Depends on the situation perhaps?
--So basically as far as conversation goes, ask the girl a question about a subject you're fairly good with, tease her and flirt with her, talk about the subject in a way that D's some HV, repeat until she's comfortable and then escalate that sh!t. That's basically it right? Lead the conversation, make it about something I'm interested in so you actually care to listen to her talk, and respond with teasing flirting or agreeing with her? Some nights I'm on fire and other nights I find it hard to keep a good conversation going, so I want to keep that basic formula in mind. I'm not worried about awkward silences, I'm well past that, but I want to excel at the initial conversation, not just stumble through it and hope she's comfortable enough and thinks I'm cute enough to not pull away when I put my arm around her waist.

Please no answers from keyboard jockeys reciting basic advice; anybody can identify what is correct and what is AFC, I'm good on that. Successful, natural approaches are a bit more complicated, and it soon becomes necessary to develop a style that comes naturally rather than using pre-scripted routines and magic tricks. I plan to make many approaches this summer until I'm damn good at it. Shouldn't be too difficult with a good venue to practice at each weekend.

 

[rushing dude 123]

the advice i will give you is, just relax and do your thing and see where it gets you. If you really get stuck on a problem and it happens frequently, then find the solution and ask about it. For now just forget about the whole DHV'ing and stufff and just rather persue every opportunity you see and then try and do this stuff naturally. This is my opinion so you don't have to take it.

Most times its good to fight for fail or success eg. "make the HOE say NO" especially when you are starting out. However do this to improve your skills to resistance and creating a more positive attitude. If a girl is being a total ***** just past resitance see if you get number, then put her to the bottom of pile after all the other numbers you get. So by doing this you will learn to be more positive, so when you open new sets you will more likely get a positive response.

I hope you improve and get what you want bro, keep this thing going.

RD

 

[Exhumed]

I downloaded Tyler Durden's "Blueprint" program on audio...holy sh!t....I've never seen natural game described with such clarity. Every hour he'd provide an insightful answer to some issue involving social skills or pickup that I could never have come up with on my own. My approach anxiety was completely eliminated, and I even learned how to deal with criticism and whatnot from other guys. Seriously, if you have fairly decent social skills and a basic understanding of what to do and what not to do with girls but you're still not getting laid, buy or steal this program. You can read all the pickup material in the world and it won't tell you what this stuff will. It's not like "Ah, that's an interesting tactic" or "That's good advice on confidence!" it's more like "Holy sh!t that's spot-on, all of my problems with women are basically on their way to being fixed now that he just said that."

Anyways, on Friday I approached a lot of women, with zero approach anxiety, and my fourth approach yielded a make-out with a random cute girl after just a few minutes. I have no recollection of her name or what I said to her because I was just living in the moment and feeling horny; my question in my last post about the structure of a conversation just seems completely irrelevant now.

On Saturday I had a few too many tequila slammers and even though I wasn't drunk by the time the party started, the heat and the tequila waged a war in my stomach and ensured I couldn't repeat Friday's success. I'm normally good with liquor, and I wasn't even drunk by that point, but I guess my stomach too pvssy for binge drinking of any type. I danced with a few girls, was getting somewhere with one, but her less attractive friend ended up ****blocking me. It was odd to see guys walking up to girls to dance and being all timid about it, and it was hard to believe I was the same way a week earlier.

In addition to all that, guys who normally like to screw with me--not in a cruel way, in a half-joking-half-insulting kind of way--treated me differently as well, probably because I handled their criticism/jokes at my expense differently than I had in the past. People would always tell me "You have to stand up for yourself" but now I see that's terrible advice, unless someone's seriously being a huge d!ck and you're way bigger than him. I didn't take offense, didn't care, didn't react, and basically that whole issue is now solved. One of the alumni visiting for the weekend said "It started out as ridicule, and then it was just like...damn, he's actually a really cool motherfvcker" which basically sums it up.

I learned a lot from this past weekend, and putting into practice the things I learned from Tyler Durden's Blueprint audio...I'm sure that if I do the same thing every weekend for the rest of the summer I'll finally lose that v-card, or at worst, make out with lots of delicious college freshmen.

 

[Exhumed]

More frat parties this past weekend, got blown out pretty quickly by almost every set I approached...danced with some girls, got rejected by some...after dancing with a blonde girl for a minute her less attractive friend told me "She doesn't want to dance with you." Just a couple of bad nights I guess?

I'm going to keep hitting the gym...I weigh ten pounds more than my petite 5'7" fifteen year old step sister who eats two meals a day and models, and I think Pook would agree it's holding me back. It's an interesting dilemma. I'm attractive enough that when I do hook up with girls, they're at least average looking, and ugly girls have that immediate contempt for me that comes from the knowledge that I'm definitely going for the hotter friend and not settling for her. But most girls seem to place more value on masculinity than attractiveness (the root of all the "Attractiveness doesn't matter!" stuff) so the majority of girls aren't into me. Fat girls don't even bother trying, almost all hot girls blow me off, and now and then a really cute girl will dig me. I feel like a lot of my problems could be solved by an extra 50 pounds of fat and muscle, but in the meantime, I guess I'll just keep playing the numbers game. It could be worse, I could be skinny and also a ginger or a race that white girls don't find attractive.

I'm still fearless in my approaches and persistent, and I don't let the rejection phase me. So what's the next step?

Question for anyone who actually goes out and approaches often, what's a bad night and what's a good night for you? Especially if you're not jacked, living in LA or NY, and practicing pickup for the past six years; newbie responses appreciated too.

 

[ArcBound]

If your fraternity has a dance basement/floor all you have to do is grind a girl. If the party is just starting you might have to talk to the girl and chat her up a bit and make her interested, but if the party is in full swing you can pretty much grind any girl sober or drunk and they are usually accepting. The order should be grind first= then talk or talk while grinding or something. Eventually it should lead to a makeout and then just a suggestion on your part to return to yours or hers dorm.

Also, you can get your fraternity bros to give you mad social proof, they can just stop the room and make a dramatic anouncement that you've came into the room and a lot more girls would be willing to talk to you/be more accepting of your advances. I'd say try it out a few times.

To your first question, if you're a really good host and can go t hroughout the party talking and jibing with everyone then yes you should and you'll be known as the life of the party esp. since you're repping your own house really well. However thats hard unless you're an extrovert another way get a girl is to play beer pong as her partner or agaisnt her. Sometimes its hard to get her as your partner cause in those parties girls travel in tiny groups together so you might want to take them on as a team and just go from there. But if you get her as your partner whatever you do you can escalate easily.

Also funnily enough if you get them into a drinking contest it usually raises their interest. I once challenged a girl to one, i would drink two for every one she would drink and i won and from there its not that hard. Plus djchina also posted a similar experience where he got the number of a girl after such a contest. I just look at the party and if i see a bored girl and tell her come with me, go to the kitchen and tell her to enter a contest with me. Sometimes takes some negotiating the rules (like me drinking double) but in the end it works out, you took a bored chick and gave her something to do at the party and she will open up her vag.

 

[Exhumed]

1. That's what I did this past weekend...every time I got rejected, or she was completely unenthusiastic about dancing, or something like that. The good thing about dance floor game is that it requires no thought or skill, the bad thing is that you're relying completely on your appearance, and I'm really skinny which makes it more difficult for me.

2. I don't know that they would do that, plus everyone at the party would probably be more confused than anything.

3. I might try that, I've never been the most social guy at the party talking to everyone I see but that doesn't mean I can't be. I guess that would involve just being genuine and friendly and talking to more than just the hottest girls. Beer pong...that has worked in the past, although there's often a long waiting list for beer pong. I guess I could just say "I'm a brother here, we're next, fvck off!" if I wanted. What usually seals the deal is when you and a wing find two girls who are friends, but that's tough when winner stays on. Once again I suppose I could just wear my letters and take control of the table.

4. I've never tried that, maybe I'll try it out next weekend. The only problem I can see running into with that is that she won't want to get drunk. Plus I'm a lightweight so drinking double could potentially result in some embarrassing sh!t, I couldn't play with that rule.

Thanks for the advice though, you seem pretty familiar with frat party game.