"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Success with coverting a friend to a romance?

speakeasy

Master Don Juan
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I'll try and keep this short. There is a girl I've been friends with for the last 10 years. I always thought she was a cool fun chic but was never really attracted to her up until about a year ago and then I started developing serious feelings for her. In the last few years, she has lost weight, got herself in shape, changed her style and has started to look pretty damn sexy to me. Now that combined with the fact that I already think she is a cool chic means I started to feel really attracted to her. There are times in the past where I felt like she had a spark for me, then just as quick, she can start flaking on me and acting standoffish. At this moment in time I know she is not interested in me in that way from the way she behaves around me. Though I know she holds me in good esteem as a friend. But then she is single and looking and so am I and it just makes so much sense to me because we both enjoy the same things, have the same values, already respect each as friends and can have a good time around one another. It seems like just a natural thing to feel attraction. But it doesn't seem to work that way with women unfortunately. laddertheory.com goes into more detail why.

I know that that trying to do a "conversion" from friend to romance the odds are not in your favor, but what do you think I could do to improve my odds? I guess I've got a bit of oneitis myself right now. But seriously, as cheesy as this sounds, everything I think about her I can feel my face starting to smile. Lately, I've tried just disappearing out her life. Not calling, not inviting her places. She's now curious as to why I haven't been keeping in touch. I remember David DeAngelo once said "give her the gift of missing you".
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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speakeasy

Master Don Juan
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Come on, anyone? Somebody out there must have found a way to turn a female friend into romance.
 

The Juan and only

Master Don Juan
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Actually, all my girlfriends have been friends first.

hugging, a lot of hugging and kino. That's the key imo.

also, unless you've just grabbed her for a hug because you decided you wanted one right then, act like you aren't all that interested -- i.e don't hang around her all the time, flirt with other girls in the group etc.

also, read the bible man, it's full of great tips.
 
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