Success story, thanks guys (warning long)

[Brandon]

--First off appologies for the length of this post, but I feel my past could help other aspiring DJ's, it also gives me a chance to reflect, and hell lets face it I was such a ****ing balless *****, it feels good to be proud of myself for a change, I'll break this up into seperate posts. Additionally I am putting this in the HS forum as almost all the info in here has to do with my HS career. Mods, if you feel it is inappropraite for this forum go ahead and move it.--

Background

Alright guys first off a little background info on me, I am now 18, with about 2 months left in my SR year. This year was the first year I ever had a real g/f. (Don't laugh yet, wait until it gets really pathetic.) This girl walked all over me, I had oneitis bad, I did everything for this girl. Even buying her 12 roses, when we were on a "break" no less. She took mad advantage of me. Trying to get other guys but when she got shot down she came back to me. Now originally I got this chick by using the DJ way, and I got her as a **** buddy, and she was a virgin before me. (I hear the only thing she ever says good about me is how she was always horny when I started to work on her. Not bad I guess for like only the 4th time I've ever got action, and the 1st time I deserved it.) Then I completely abandoned my game plan. I forgot about the site for the most part. Sure, consciously I came back to it now and then, mostly for a few laughs from some of the characters on here. But thankfully, it was always in the back of my mind. I got stuck in a relationship that was basically me constantly busting my balls, for complete disrespect. ::Small break from writting here, as I'm disgusted as **** just thinking about it.:: I PUT THE MOTHER****ING CAPTIAL C IN AFC. Hell, I wasn't even an AFC, as I was so bad I wasn't average, I was beyond frustrated, and I was a complete chump. So to make this story short (too late huh?) think of the worst ****ing ***** you've ever seen, and the meanest most sadistic ***** possible (which I believe is my fault, I lost her respect, and I let her get away with it.) And you got what I wish my relationship could've been. Then I started coming back to the site and I started busting my moves on her again, her IL shot back up, she started persuing me, and like a fool I took the bait, and forgot about the DJ ways. You know the result. Fast forward a month later, she calls me the day after my Birthday, and says well i did call you on your birthday but you werent there (very sarcastic) and get this, I ****ing appologize. ::Shakes head in shame:: then she lets loose on a ****ing barrage nonstop *****ing and yelling at me, and i listen for about 2 ****ing hours being torn apart. and then she ****ing hangs up on me. the next day she calls me, and i answer and she says hey, and i go sorry but im busy (i wanted to ****ing yell and cuss and insult, but i now realize that it was better not to) and i hang up the phone. So right then I swore to myself that **** had to change, and Im a ****ing man and its time to start acting like one, and so began my voyage to pimpsville.

 

[Brandon]

The Learning Process

I think, looking back, that sheer anger at women is what gets most males to come to this site. They look for the quick answer, that one line, that one article of clothing or colonge that will get you the *****. And then they can score, and ****ing get back at women once and for all. At least that's how I got here. Now this part coming up is vital. THERE IS NO ONE THING, NO ONE LINE, THAT MAKES YOU A DJ. Believe me you get tired of learning, tired of reading and re-reading. Tired of getting shut down. Its enough to make a guy say **** it and one day this beautiful princess will come by and love me for who I am and I can buy her roses and read her poems by the ocean at sunset. Until then I'll just playa hate, and make fun of those who get play cuz they sold out or they're preps, or they follow trends or they're jerks or whatnot. For the most part you need to ****ing realize that's jealousy talking. And then you'll learn that women aren't as untouchable as you once realized. They aren't that complex. You'll understand that for being so ****ing complicated, women are not that hard to figure out. Trust me, at first when nothing happens you will want to give up. To me this is nothing more than weeding out the men from the boys. If you don't want to put in the mother****ing effort, don't, but then don't come here and ***** to these guys that I love her and her b/f's an *******, and that you don't understand you gave her chocolates and talked to her endlessly on the phone about her b/f and said you loved her the 3rd time you hung out. These people are giving you the opportunity to learn, do so. But you must understand it takes time. Don't give up.

Some of the problems I initially had (aka as learn from my dumbass and don't repeat this ****).

1. I read but didn't practice. You must not only read but put into effect once you start to have an understanding. This is a constant learning process. Practice continuously. Don't just say sure kino I can do that. DO IT.
2. I was doubtful. Don't be. Enough said.
3. I felt like I was selling out, that I was turning away from everything I once stood for. Well guess what, I wasn't. If selling out means that I am improving myself, than so be it.
4. I got down. Don't get depressed. You'll get there soon enough.
5. I expected too much too soon. This takes time. For me I became an AFC over the course of about 17 years, I can't expect to become a DJ by reading a few articles in one night.
6. MOST IMPORTANTLY--I was scared ****less of being rejected. I couldn't get over it. It's something I'm still struggling with, but am striving to overcome. Understand, please, that rejection is not that big of a deal. You may worry about people finding out, but remember "Those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." Your real homies got your back whether or not that fine girl goes out with you. **** those who ain't your real homies.

I read over and over again. This was a rather long process, but looking back it was probably one of the most important things to my success, second only to the changes I made. Which brings me to my next post.

 

[Brandon]

Changes

Change, is probably the hardest to accept, yet the most inevitable, part of life (aside from death). You must break free of your comfort zone. You must learn that you can grow as an individual, and change is not bad. I know it's uncomfortable, and sometimes downright painful to change, but you have to. Your not changing to be popular, or to get girls (they are just an added bonus), or to become friends with the star quarterback. You are changing for yourself. Now if your happy the way you are, fine so be it, stop reading. But to me what good is life the moment you stop growing, the moment you stop trying to better yourself. Believe me I was happy (or so I thought) with my moppy hair, the black sweater, and torn blue jeans. But guess what, I wasn't. Now, once I finally decided to step up and stop waiting for life and things to happen to me, and instead make things happen in my life the way i wanted it to go, my life started to go my way. I got new clothes, not unbelievably expensive but nice. You don't have to wear a tux, or look fly in the Gucci suits, but make an attempt to look decent. Most importantly find your own style. Other peoples styles don't fit on you, just as your styles wouldn't fit on them. Notice how certain kids look like retards when they try to dress as a gangster, or as a cowboy, when it's obviously not meant for them. Yet other people could take the same clothes and put them on and be unbelievable. For me it was black slacks, khakis, nice casual dress pants. With these i would wear a nice shirt, depending on the situation. Maybe a sort of flashy shirt for a party, a nice long sleeve button up cotton shirt, or even just a plain black t-shirt suddenly looks good when its tucked in. I got myself a nice watch. Started doing my hair in the morning. Started to wear my contacts. Nice shoes. Now this is an essential part of my changing. But it wasn't enough. Once I started taking pride in my appearance, people started taking notice of me. The clothes alone were not enough. I started walking with my head up, my shoulders back, my back straight. I walked with a purpose. I walked like i ruled the school, and you know what, once i started doing all that, i did own the school. I walked into rooms and people took notice of my appearance. Understand that i was always a little popular, but it was cuz i was naturally witty but i always used my wit like a retard. No one wanted to really chill with me, but they were more than happy to use me for entertainment. No more. I wasnt sitting at home wishing i could kick it with certain guys. these guys came up to me asking for MY phone number so they could chill with me. Girls that i once would kill for just to talk to them were initiating convos with me. I was the talk of the school. Guys that used to talk **** to me were intimidated. Not because of anything i did to them, but because of what i did to myself. I took pride in myself, I carried myself like i was the man, and in doing so became the man. I thought it was all bull****. This talk about your attitude and people being able to see it. Boy was i wrong. It is 100% true. Your attitude is key. You have to be proud without being arrogant. Sympathetic without being everyones psychiatrist. Willing to help but not being a *****. Its hard to reach this attitude, but once you do reach it you will know your there, and from there its pretty easy to maintain that attitude. Now then, I started wearing colonge. After reading a bunch of people recomend Curve, I used it. People liked it, but everyone and their ****ing cousin had it, everyone knew what it was, i wasn't standing out. So i was macking on this girl, and somehow colonge came up. She said victorias secret very sexy was the best. after taking a quick poll it seemed that many many girls were quite fond of it, but most guys seemed oblivious to that fact. I told this girl that if she bought me a bottle of it i would consider trying it out on a dinner that i was taking her to on friday night. she said yes to the date and smiled. 2 days later, friday. said girl walks up and says she has a friend that gets a discount there cuz she works there, so she picked this up for me. bam it was the colonge. GUYS THIS STUFF IS GOLDEN. holy **** ive been wearing it for like 2 weeks and jesus christ, i never thought an ugly **** like me would have to beat girls off with a stick, but i do. 1st weekend alone i got some action and 5 numbers (may not be a lot to some people, but this is huge for me.) If you take nothing else from this section, take this It's not the clothes that make the man, its the man that makes the clothes.

 

[Brandon]

Present

Guys after being such a loser for so long, damn I am loving life. No more than 6 months ago i was suicidal over losing a girl, and now, i realize that life is such a gift, and that girls are just a great part of it, but THEY ARE NOT LIFE. I have numerous girls i chill with, girls calling to hang with me, im partying every weekend. I like going to school, the respect, the girls. But most of all I like the change Ive made in my life, the way i feel about myself. This, to me, is the most important thing this site has given me. Everyone talks about me. I'm getting better at most of the DJ tactics. But I still have much to learn. And am constantly doing so. In fact the one regret i have, is that this will be my last yr in HS, and that I did not start doing this sooner. At the same time though I look forward to no hs. I look at it now and see it for all the bull**** it really is. The **** talking, the game playing, the social hierarchy. Do not fall into their traps. i see such immaturity that it really makes me laugh. i see through the games girls play. their petty jealousy games and such. No longer do i buy into them. I have recently learned that the girl i talked about in my first post still *****es about me to her friends. that she still talks **** about me. i laugh. theres nothing to do but laugh. i just feel nothing but pity towards this poor girl. and the other day i was walking down the hallway and overheard her conversation, and now i know that im becoming a dj, BG stands for my ex, ***** girl. FBF stands for her former best friend who i ended up fooling around with.

BGmigod look at his clothes, hes so obviously trying to impress girls, hes such a ****ing *******, everyone sees through it he looks like a moron.
FBF:you know ive talked to him and he seems like a really great guy and you need to stop talking about him months after youve broken up with him, and you havent talked to him for about 2 months
BG:what are you trying to say.
FBF:well i think, and many others, that you realize you ****ed up bad breaking up with him, and now you just constantly try to bring him down so you look better, well it doesnt work
BG:**** YOU
FBF:Whatever, i think he looks really good, and so does everyone else, and this person that you think is the biggest ****ing ***** in the world seems to be in a lot of other people's opinion one of the coolest guys around

at which point she comes up to me and starts talking to me. the look on the bg's face was priceless, and i just winked at her. drove her nuts.

 

[Brandon]

Closing

I know i sound like an infomercial here but i have nothing to sell: Ask yourselves why your still waiting, why you haven't begun to live. Why you haven't talked to that one girl, why you don't socialize. Believe me, if i an overweight former AFC can do it you can too. Overall, to me the one thing that makes you a DJ is attitude. Not clothes, money, ice, mad hot girls, cars, pickup lines, numbers, none of that, its all attitude. Get the attitude down and the rest comes. People know a winner, they can sense it, so become a winner and people will treat you like one. Have respect for yourself and others. Once you gain the attitude that you have a great life, and other people (especially girls) should be thankful if you chose to accept them into it, it will become true. Once you stop trying to get a life, and you just live, you will wake up one morning and realize that you are now living, and it's not just any life, but its the life you want.

 

[Sammo]

That was a long read, but sure was a good read. I admire how you changed yourself. From reading your post probably one of the most important things you have learnt and accquired. Is the MINDSET, Act as if... and you shall become(credit to Kaizen). Also i liked what you said about living, if your not constantly improving, and just sitting there... living, then you might as well be dead.

Life's a gift dont abuse it by not improving yourself.

Enjoy your new life man....

 

[Brandon]

Thanks sam! I was getting a little worried that no one would reply. Yeah it is really long, but I'm sure anyone can find something helpful in there.

 

[Cloud-uk]

lol, that was priceless, such a good post! Congrats !- I'm sure the feeling of hearing your FBF talking BG down must have been fantastic! Congrats again on making the journey

 

[CrzyBadBoyDJ]

Man, that was uplifting. I really liked the part about the not giving in to the jealousy games that girls play. I really need to work on that one because (if you read my other posts) it's been going on in a dating relationship that I'm having with a girl.

This is truly grade A top quality **** right here. This should be the new "Why Not Just Be Yourself?" post. This is the introduction that everyone should read if they want to change themselves into a DJ. This was so good, that I might have to reread it again. You just seem so powerful that **** like them jealousy games and stuff, they don't bother you. I can do the same things. Thanks.

 

[PiHiPlaya]

What an Amazingly Brilliant Post!
This is great for me coming to the realization of this because of you. Thank You So Much! I'm glad i found this as a freshman. If I can get this mindset over spring break or summer I will be good to know. I'm so happy to here a senior tell us about stupid girl mindgames. Know i can realize what they are doing and shrug it off.

Thanks Man!

 

[Brandon]

Cloud-Thanks a lot dude! It was great, just the look on her face, priceless is the right word for it.
Crzy-Thanks. I'll admit, at one time I was a complete sucker for their games. They said another guy was hot, I got pissed, they talked to another guy, I went through the roof. At this point, if a girl wants to play her games, let her play them. But she'll learn soon enough that real men will grow tired of them, and they were either hit her back with it tenfold, or they'll just let her self-destruct.
PiHi-Thanks to you as well. I am glad as well that you have come to this site as a freshmen. Learn as much as you can. Enjoy high school, and do me proud.

Following along the lines of girl's mindgames, understand the more they play, and the less you react, the more you will reverse the power towards yourself. And more often than not, playing a mind game such as these shows that she is interested in you, and she's just testing to see if that interest is justified. Mindgames are a good indication that you are doing something right. Either that or the girl is a *****. ; ) One girl in particular, who I would have probably had one-itis for in my past, is really fond of these mindgames. When I do something she doesn't like, ie talk to another girl, she will try to hit me with something along the lines of, "David's hot isn't he?" How pathetic is that? In the past I would get depressed over a comment like that, now I see it for what it is. Bull****. Pure and simple. She ONLY mentions this guy when I am doing something she doesn't like. Even better is if you can neg-hit her back with something. I have said things such as, "I suppose he's pretty good looking, you should go for him, being as your probably realizing I'm way out of your league." Pair something like this with a wink while you continue flirting with another girl, and it is so potent it's amazing. Keep in mind this is one of your typical princess, I'm beautiful so no one disagrees with me, type. Guess how often she talks about David now? Never. She gives her upmost attention to me when I speak to her, and even when I'm not, she still pays attention to me.

Everyone else-Don't be shy, let me know what you think, any opinions or criticism, positive or negative, is welcome.

 

[Trial Error]

That was one great post there, Brandon. It's a shame I found this site in my senior year too. As I'm working to get out of this AFC state, I look up to you as role model now. By the way, you're from AZ, I assume you mean Arizona. If so, where in Arizona do you live?

- Alex

 

[Mikelo2k]

w00t

DAMN DUDE, that one one sick story Props on changing yourself, and i'm happy for you. It was a very inspirational post

THat's fvckin funny sh!t, the dialogue between EX and her best friend, that wink that you threw in musta hurt SO bad

I got 2 years of HS left, im gonna try my best to become a DJ, change my ways and enjoy life for once

Peace,
Mikelo2k

 

[CrzyBadBoyDJ]

Yeah dude! Thanks brandon I dig that info you just gave me. I'll have to use that line or something like it. Poor poor jealous girls! lol

 

[Brandon]

Thanks for your replies ya'll! And to the rest of ya, what are you waiting for? I'd like to know what you think of this, and if needed, ask me to go in greater detail about something, go ahead and feel free to ask any questions.

Alex-I live in the Phoenix/Scottsdale area. Good luck with climbing out of the AFC mindset. Just remember it IS just a mindset and since you put yourself in it, you can get yourself out. Once you get the ball rolling it becomes easier, starting is the hard part. And ask me anything you want.
Mikelo-It was great hearing that conversation. Not because I care so much about my ex and what she thinks, but it shows that people that I barely even know are being affected so much by my presence that they are willing to defend me, without me even being knowledgable of it. Throw in the fact that my ex used to tell me that it made her melt when I would wink at her, and it just gets better.
Crzy-Any time dude. Remember though, the words themselves are just like the clothes I discussed earlier. They matter, but it depends more on the person delivering them. How you deliver the lines is just as key, if not moreso, than what you actually say yourself. You won't believe the cheezy lines I can say with the right effect, that actually work. And like the clothes, work off of my line, but eventually try to get your own wit going, your own style, and soon people will be emulating you.

 

[Trial Error]

So true, so true Brandon. Thanks. I live somewhere south of Phoenix.

 

[DJ Girevik]

Awesome post, glad to hear from a fellow Brandon ^_^ My process from AFC to DJ actually started in June or so, when I began making tons of female friends (NOT LJBF), and thus women and their attention became something that wasn't very important or rare to me. Then my coming to this site in November is what helped me put it all together I wish I found this while I was a freshman! But better late than never, and I'll have lots of college and after years ^_^

 

[Brandon]

Trial Error-That's cool man, I'm not really too fond of this state.
Dj Gir-I'm sure getting female friends the right way helps out a lot. It never hurts to be seen talking to a lot of girls. And while your in college, make up for lost time brother.

 

[jmm854]

Great post man! Inspiring to say the least, really enjoyed your story. Keep workin it man, never get satisfied!