Stumbled over my words... feel like an idiot!

[silverwex]

Nothing to do with sarging girls but I was in my local post office today and had to ask the cashier for a Certificate of Postage for a package I had to post.

So anyway I gave her the package and while she was weighing it:

Me: Can I have a certifi...
Me: Certific...
Me: Cer...

I finally blubbed out 'Certificate of Postage' to which she replied 'No problem' with a smile but I felt like such an idiot.

It was so weird cos there was no pressure on me and no one else really around but my anxiety made me rush my words and hence the mess up.

One guy standing nearby looked over after I had fvcked up too.

Over the past few months I have killed off about 70% of my anxiety but I just find in public situations when I have to interact with people in the service industry I rush and mess up my words and I beat myself up for ages after.

Thanks for reading!

 

[Page]

Don't be so hard on yourself.

You're still human, and humans have a tendency to fvck things up for no specific reason.

Being perfect about everything turns people away too.

 

[al77]

Originally posted by silverwex
Nothing to do with sarging girls but I was in my local post office today and had to ask the cashier for a Certificate of Postage for a package I had to post.

So anyway I gave her the package and while she was weighing it:

Me: Can I have a certifi...
Me: Certific...
Me: Cer...

I finally blubbed out 'Certificate of Postage' to which she replied 'No problem' with a smile but I felt like such an idiot.

She was right, I see no problem. I do this all the time, so I simply got used to it.

Do you stutter? Then it is a bit different but very curable.

 

[Create Reality]

Play it off like you got Downs syndrome, she will understand.

 

[silverwex]

Play it off like you got Downs syndrome, she will understand.

Hmm... thanks for that man. lol

Cheers for the replies guys - the thing is: I dont have a stutter! I just tend to rush my words when a bit anxious and this messes my talking up.

Think Ill just start listening to hypnosis cds more to help me relax and feel more confident.

 

[al77]

Originally posted by silverwex
Think Ill just start listening to hypnosis cds more to help me relax and feel more confident.

hypnosis cds??!Man...have you ever heard about somebody confident due to hypnosis?

It is much better to work with a specific problem. I a much wrose situation with my words. So I suggest you the follwoing:
when you feel anxious, befor eyou start talking make a point to yourself to talk _slowly_. If you slow down, the words will be much more articulate no matter how you say them.
The key is to catch your state "I am anxious a bit. Ok. When I start speaking I will talk very sl..ooo...wwww".

 

[Jariel]

I do that kind of thing all the time, especially when stressed or tired. The key is to laugh it off, excuse it with a lighthearted comment and not take it so seriously.

Just think of a little line you can use if it happens again. I usually just sigh and say "it's been a long day" or "let me just rephrase that in English for you". Slow down and try again.

It's not really down to lack of confidence, more due to rushing and stress. Try to condition yourself to slow down and take your time more.

 

[ethnomethodologist]

Get some friends and act like a dumbass On purpose. It's a fun thing to do, like talk funny to them, and no matter how many times they tell you to stop don't. If they don't want to have fun, they're not your friends

 

[diplomatic_lies]

I do it all the time. Stumble over words, or say the wrong word. It's normal.

 

[Soprano]

happens to me a lot.....

 

[silverwex]

Thanks for the replies guys.

Yeah after it happened and when I was kicking myself I thought of ways I couldve blown it off, saying something like: 'What was that?! And I dont even stutter...!!! lol'.

To the guy who posted about hypnosis not helping with confidence - its been proven that it does help man.

I think I rush things like this because my self esteem wouldnt be at its highest and (listen to this - Ive thought long and hard about it!) I rush my words so as to keep people from looking at me for longer than necessary so as to speed up the time I have to get outta there...

I suppose it comes down to me not being totally comfortable with the way i look...

 

[cant think of a user name]

I used to feel like that after I 'screwed up' something in a social interaction, but not any more.

How did I overcome it?

I learned to accept myself, accept that I am human and will make some mistakes, and that doing something like accidentally stuttering in a sentence is only a minor mistake that no one really cares about.

After the cashier smiled, I would have just smiled back. I guess after a while of being socially anxious, I reached a point where I just dont really care anymore if I do something so minor like stumble over my words.

I hope you reach that point too. You will feel so much more liberated.

One last thing: Don't beat yourself up about it. It does no good. Forget about it and move on. Smile.

 

[THE_ADDMAN]

reframe time:

what you were saying was so important, you had to repeat it a few times to make sure she got it.

 

[aBAzLLnA]

hypnosis cds??!Man...have you ever heard about somebody confident due to hypnosis?

It's actually pretty power ****, no matter how noob you feel resorting to hypnosis. The power of the mind man.

 

[dannyc]

damn dude you thinking about it so much and making a thread is the problem, not the stuttering. If this happened to me and it probably has, ill just forget about it and get on with what im doing next. chill dude we all sometimes go blank.

 

[silverwex]

thanks for the replies all.

 

[al77]

Originally posted by aBAzLLnA
It's actually pretty power ****, no matter how noob you feel resorting to hypnosis. The power of the mind man.

Who is saying it is not powerful? It is.
As well as alcohol and pain killers.

You can get a boost of confidence from alcohol, but did alcohol cure anyone from being shy? Made anyone confident?

You can suppress pain with a pain killer pill, but did it cure anyone ever?