"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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stuck in a rut.

Alex DeLarge

Master Don Juan
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Anyone ever been on a few dates with different girls only to get so fed up with their BS that you don't even care anymore? I've been having no ambition to sarge because I just say to myself in my head "She's probably just another manipulative women that's gonna try to string me along.. Why even bother approaching and why not just save my time for other things?"

It's tough because I want to sarge, I want to get laid.. But at the same time I don't want to deal with any sort of emotional attachment that may come about from myself.

I've realized lately that this emotional attachment does indeed happen to me no matter how much I deny it. I tell myself "that's AFC, don't do that" and supress it. I think I really need to get a hold of my emotions and conquer them with logical thought somehow. When I supress these emotions I miss out on opportunities to have a girl by my side, when I show these emotions I lose the girl.

Is anyone else stuck in this rut? I've been on here for a few months now and still cannot seem to conquer my inner AFC. I have no problem talking to and socializing with women whatsoever and can usually be pretty clever and suave. Maybe I'm just going for girls that are too hot? Most of these girls show high interest for a week or two, then some more physically attractive guy comes along and scoops them up from me.

I'd like criticism here. I don't care if it's brutally honest because that's indeed the best for personal growth in the end. Thanks in advance.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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joverby

Master Don Juan
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You seem pretty incongruent, man. You always talk about how you want to get laid or are totally going to screw this girl at a party. Or this one girl that' you've been friends with forever who you started kissing but didnt' escalate.

You say these chicks get scooped up after a couple or a few weeks. Maybe it could be your lack of sexual assertion / confidence.(Hard to be confident about something you've only seen on your computer.) These chicks probably want to get fvcked and you aren't pulling the trigger.

I normally bang a chick probably the 3rd "date", max.(If it's going anywhere)
 

The_411

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The rut is almost always due to the the same things .... a lack of other activities, lack of multiple options, and outcome dependence all three of these things come back to the worst trait a man can have neediness.

Your goal: to hook up tonight
A DJ's goal: Have a great time, seize the moment, and if there happens to be a HB that wants to get down then alright.

Desperation is a stinky cologne.

Make your goal to have a good time and you'll see when you're not affected by the outcome of women you'll perfromed much better with them.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

pdx1138

Master Don Juan
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When I get in a rut where women are concerned I take a break for a few weeks or months then get back to it when it suits me.

rinse & repeat.

Your not closing them could quite honestly be related to your virginity.

Figure out a way, by whatever means necessary to lose the v-card stat.
 

L B

Master Don Juan
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How about you just set a clear goal to focus on. You can drown that pessimistic voice by just focusing on one thing.

On this date, I will focus on getting some tongue action. Once that's done, I am happy, anything more would be a bonus. Next date or next girl, I will focus on groping, err I mean kino. Anything more would be a bonus. Once you accomplish that, next date would be...

Just focus on one goal per date and you will end up happier and more competent in the dating world. When you have plenty of success, then you can choose which one has quality and spend more time with her. Since she's quality, there will be less drama = more happiness.
 
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