Strangest date I've ever had. Was this girl just a weirdo, or was she playing me?

[starfishandcoffee]

Met this girl in a coffee shop on Saturday while trying to get some school reading done. She was from another city and hopping around the country for no particular reason. We talked, we connected, we left together and went for a 30 minute walk around the neighborhood - she didn't drink. She kept telling me I looked like her last boyfriend and had the same name. (WTF?) Would have gone for a kiss if I wasn't so terrified of getting the cheek turn in front of 40 people. Number closed and left.

She was only in town for a few days, so I wasted no time and called her the next night to set up a Monday night visit to an open mic. Great rapport, or so I thought. She stood me up, and sent me a half-apologetic text at 5 AM on Tuesday saying “oh, I take 19 hour naps sometimes, whoops”.

I called her out on her crap and told her that I did not appreciate having my time wasted. Instead of apologizing, she kept defending herself and sent me three rambling texts claiming she wasn't looking for romance (which I never brought up). She also tells me that she's working as an exotic dancer to fund her road trip, which was a red flag I should have noticed.

I then did something that I probably shouldn't have done...shrugged my shoulders, pretended I never read the texts, and then said “OK. Seeing a jazz combo tonight, and you're making this up to me. 9 PM, see you then.”

She got there a half hour before I did and sent me 5 texts before I got there. Sat down with her, and for the whole night we acted like a couple. (general flirting and hand-holding, kino, and very frank talk about sex.) After about 30 minutes of this, I go in for a kiss. Her reaction is different, to say the least.

“No. I can't.”

“You can't?”

“I like you, but you'd have to be my soulmate at this point in my life. Did you even read that earlier text?”

I've never had a girl accept every lick of kino I've doled out and then refuse to kiss me. I got out of there in 20 minutes or so (made up a story) and I may not accept her surprise Facebook friend request.

What the hell just happened?

 

[BeDJ]

Number closed and left.
Good Job!

She stood me up, and sent me a half-apologetic text at 5 AM on Tuesday saying “oh, I take 19 hour naps sometimes, whoops”.
"Stop thinking about me so much"

Instead of apologizing, she kept defending herself and sent me three rambling texts claiming she wasn't looking for romance (which I never brought up).
That's good.

I then did something that I probably shouldn't have done...shrugged my shoulders, pretended I never read the texts, and then said “OK. Seeing a jazz combo tonight, and you're making this up to me. 9 PM, see you then.”
Very Good.

She got there a half hour before I did and sent me 5 texts before I got there. Sat down with her, and for the whole night we acted like a couple. (general flirting and hand-holding, kino, and very frank talk about sex.) After about 30 minutes of this, I go in for a kiss. Her reaction is different, to say the least.

“No. I can't.”

“You can't?”

NAAAOOOOOOO! Next time shrug and laugh it off, like how you did before.

“I like you, but you'd have to be my soulmate at this point in my life. Did you even read that earlier text?”

"Well, I don't think you'd pass my soulmates test."

I've never had a girl accept every lick of kino I've doled out and then refuse to kiss me. I got out of there in 20 minutes or so (made up a story) and I may not accept her surprise Facebook friend request.

What the hell just happened?

These type of women LOVE playing games. She was sh!t testing you the entire time. All you had to do was be aloof and dish back whatever she throws at you. Instead, you bailed while having a girl out on a date with you. For her to FB add you means that she actually put in work to find you. Her interest is still there, I'd give it another shot.

 

[zinc4]

You could have been banging her...this was a sh&t test because some guy treated badly before and she didn't want to feel stupid or slutty or foolish or pumped and dumped and you let her femininity override your masculinity....all you had to do was brush it aside and keep going forward and you could have had her in your bed or at least making out hardcore......i have encountered a lot of these type of chicks lately...and i always end up geeting my way with them after the initial kiss or first 2 kiss rejections...trust me her IL was high...you just failed the **** test....

Girls like this live in fairy tale land as well...if you kept going and pushed through then she would rationalize oh, he must be the one after fighting successfully through such strong resistance...women are crazy...but oh so fun to play with...

 

[starfishandcoffee]

a small addition..she offered to drive me home under one condition - I wouldn't try to kiss her again. Are you telling me that was girl talk for "I want you to do me in the car"?

I also forgot to mention that she's currently on hiatus with a boyfriend. (she's still "in a relationship" on Facebook, but then again she did let me run my hands all over her legs.)

These type of women LOVE playing games. She was sh!t testing you the entire time. All you had to do was be aloof and dish back whatever she throws at you. Instead, you bailed while having a girl out on a date with you. For her to FB add you means that she actually put in work to find you. Her interest is still there, I'd give it another shot.

I'm in uncharted territory here - this girl's particularly hot, and I'm used to doing marginally attractive women who pull no punches.

see, I'm terrified of aggressively manhandling women into kissing me - I'm still only moderately experienced, and I don't know them inside and out. I don't want her to start hitting me when I try again and "I can't" actually meant "I can't". should I just not care?

I'll learn from this. hopefully I can see her one more time, but I'm so tied up this week I might not even bother