"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Strange relationship, your thoughts?

Mr. Goods

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I am a part-time employee with a sports team. Recently, I met a HB9 who is a postseason game-day assistant who works with out department. She was with us for about four days over the span of a week. The relationship I have/had with her was, in a word, unique. I don't even know what to make of it:

-We are both outgoing people with the same sarcastic sense of humor. As you could guess, this made conversation quite interesting.
-The first time we meet, the topic shifts to sports teams we like. Of course, she likes all of my team's arch-rivals. When I proudly stated one of my teams, she replied with "strike 2." One of her teams lost by a lot that night, and I made sure to let her know about it. She joked that she was going to smack me. From this point on, we became playful "rivals" (the next time I saw her, she came up to me and bragged about how, "[HER] teams won")
-The majority of our conversation during the other few days was back-and-forth good-natured banter (again, sarcastic senses of humor). Always a back-and-forth exchange and an amazing ability on us both to keep that going at such a quick pace. Sometimes, she'd make fun of me, sometimes I'd made fun of her.
---Once in a while, I would bash on her and she'd reply, "That's Mr. Goods trying to make a joke about me" with a smirk. Later on, she'd see another "cute guy" and ask me if she looked good (she is gorgeous). Immediately, I say, "Meh" with a smirk. Her friend chips in with, "What did you think he was going to say?"
-Several times, she would look at me and smile. One of my co-workers overheard her say that I "look good with a good sense of humor to boot."
-So far, so good, right? Well, next come the games. One of the other volunteers became a friend to us both, and she would kino him a bit. She'd even text me to say that "he's keeping me warm when I'm outside." There is a 0% chance she has any interest in him (trust me), so I play that off with a smile. She did initiate some kino with me (she came up and hugged me one day), but since we are in a work environment, only so much can be done.
---She did remark - jokingly (I think) - that "[Guy friend] is nice, and I'm mean," but she gave a little smile and didn't seem angry by any means (yes, I made a remark about her favorite player). I am a bit of a ball-buster and make a lot of sarcastic/witty jokes, but I don't consider myself a mean person...in fact, I'm probably more on the nice side. Especially since I am at work and don't want to cause any issues.
-The questions then rise towards the most recent events. In another one of our back-and-forths, we try to figure out who would win a pretend fight if we fought. (I don't hit girls, but we were putting that aside for the debate...yes she brought this topic up because I joked that she probably doesn't punch very hard). She said, "if punched her in the arm, she'd punch me in the face" in a teasing tone. Being the ball-buster that I am, I made sure to LIGHTLY punch her arm the next few times we ran into each other. One of my other friends claims she was getting annoyed by the joke punching and he thinks that could hurt my chances (she was speaking with her girl friend apparently), but she made no indication of this annoyance to me. She continued to tease. At the end of our most recent day, she claims she "doesn't hug" (I was on my way out for the day). Knowing what was going to happen next, my supervisor plays along and playfully separates us (he's seen some of what's been going on with the banter).

My one big question would be if she was genuinely teasing or if there's a chance she was getting annoyed for whatever reason. I have no way of knowing, though our mutual friend assured me she knows we are only playing around (One time, a girl I knew thought my jokes were serious and got very mad). I could not be very forward, since we are at work and I don't feel like putting my job in any jeopardy (one complaint = trouble).

Do YOU think there would be any sexual tension here? What should I look for to determine if there is sexual tension? Is there also any way of telling if she was actually annoyed instead of being funny? Once her volunteering ends - which is very soon - I might consider calling her and seeing if she'd be up for a date - however, she attends college 45 mins away. Given what I wrote, I feel she'd either really be up for it or blow up in my face. No middle ground.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Mantis Toboggan

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Mr. Goods said:
Do YOU think there would be any sexual tension here? What should I look for to determine if there is sexual tension? Is there also any way of telling if she was actually annoyed instead of being funny?
Eh. Until a woman agrees to meet you specifically for a date, I dont think anyone here can read signs to tell you what to do.

Bring her out for a drink and find out. It doesn't have to be awkward. It starts off as a casual drink. You kino her a bit, and see if she's receptive. THEN if she's cool, you go for the kiss. If she's not receptive to light friendly touching, then you have you answer. But either way, you know for sure and you're not trying to read a woman's mysterious "signs"
 

jophil28

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Hmm, you know what I think?
Your 'interaction" with her resembles that of two boisterous young men engaged in light friendly horseplay.

Unless you change the very essence of this 'game' you and she are going to become cemented into it forever .
She will become your best boyfriend.
At some stage soon you have to reveal your sexual interest in her so that she can activate her feminine nature in response.
 
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Jeffst1980

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You are headed straight into friendzone due to inaction. She flirted with you past the point where you should have asked her out, and now she's putting 2 and 2 together and realizing that you don't have the confidence to make a move. Expect the flirtiness to disappear if this is the case.

Also, if you call her after her job ends, chances are she will have already forgotten you and will be busy with college.

Personally, I'd leave this one alone. She was probably interested at first, but your lack of action has brought this to an awkward place. Keep in mind that EVERYONE (including her) knows that you like her, and are too shy to ask her out. Don't tell your friends (and especially not HER friends) when you like a girl!!
 

cordoncordon

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IMO you've blown it by being too much of a play friend with her. Her initial sense of attraction, whatever there was, has been replaced by a feeling of you being her buddy. And to be honest, it sounds like she is getting sick of that too. Constant sarcasm and playful ribbing can get old.

On a side note, does anyone here NOT date a HB 8-10 lol? I swear the world must be teaming with total babes, because everyone here seems to date one. It's time to start getting pics of these girls...or they are all 6's to me. :)

BTW in case you are wondering, I have posted pics of my gf.

Also, you seem like a really nice guy, and Im sure you are "funny". But generally I've found that people that need to tell people how laid back and sarcastic they are? Aren't as funny as they think. Generally they go overboard with it.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Mr. Goods

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Good points, but I just wanted to throw this out here again:

I have a part-time job that goes towards my career. It's not a job like being a cashier at Wal-Mart where I can get transferred or released and it's no big deal (like some of the posters here who pursue girls at this work). I will not put my job at risk.

A few years ago, I nearly got into a sticky situation at work because I was pursuing a girl I work with. Luckily, nothing happened because: 1.) I never made a move (thank goodness too...I later discovered she is a guidette), and 2.) My bosses liked me more than her.

The point is, I will not ask a girl out while I am working with her. Even if it looks like a slam-dunk, I do not want to do anything that puts my job or career in any sort of danger.

Normally, I like to move quickly and ask a girl out, for better or worse. However, when currently working with a girl - a job that goes towards my career, not just a "job" job, I need to be extra cautious.
 

Mr. Goods

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Jeffst1980 said:
Keep in mind that EVERYONE (including her) knows that you like her, and are too shy to ask her out. Don't tell your friends (and especially not HER friends) when you like a girl!!
I'm not sure about this. Years ago, I wasn't able to hide my intentions well, and everyone would know about it. Now, I have a much stronger frame and act similarly towards everyone. No one I work with even knows that I "like" her. If they did, I would have heard about it.
 
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