Strange mixed signals (NOT an AFC post)

[Alphathree]

HB8.5 from earlier thread.

The following is TRUE. She:

- leans on me
- puts her head on my shoulder
- hugs me
- has dated me about six months ago (went as far as making out in my room with shirt/bra off)
- is a virgin
- calls me literally every day
- goes out dancing with me

The following is ALSO TRUE. She:

- rejected my kiss last night -- "Don't"
- always verbally groups me with her "friends"
- says she's not interested in boys

What, exactly, would you make of this? My conclusion is that she's just insane.

EDIT - either that or I had really bad breath at the time or something? Lol.

 

[joekerr31]

you're an afc.

she knows that she can go all the way with you whenever she wants. so she'll pull the trigger when she's good and ready. who knows, maybe another guy will come along that she is more interested in.

doesn't matter to her. she has you all tee'd up and she can swing whenver she is good and ready.

my advice, go get a girlfriend.

the moment you do this she will go nuts with jealousy and suddenly it will be "you KNOW i've always liked you. i can't believe you are doing this." blah blah blah.

she likes you, but she thinks of you as a chump. not much you can do now other than to show you aren't a chump. and the only way to do that is to go out and get a girl that will satisfy your needs.

J

 

[Alphathree]

Dont make the mistake of thinking this is the only girl in my life.

When I'm out with her, I spend 50%+ of the time with other girls making them laugh. I do crazy social proof. Trust me.

I demonstrate that I can have anyone else I want (and I can), but of course I want her (probably because I can't have her, psychology and all.)

I had the whole damn bar applauding me the other night in front of her. How much higher frickin value can I get?

I guess I could literally wander off (out?) with another girl in her presence.

EDIT - oh, and f*ck you for the AFC comment =p

EDIT#2 - yeah, you're absolutely right, I need to make out with someone in front of her or something extreme. I don't think I actually need a 'girlfriend' per se. That's too complicated.

Trying to decide who I want to make out with... don't want to lower my status by making out with an HB7... but it'll be tricky to get someone hotter in just the right scenario. Ugh, this is also complicated. Maybe I'll just ignore her for a week=)

 

[diablo]

My opinion? You screwed up and haven't realized it. The part that convinced me was when you said that she "dated you about 6 months ago - went as far as making out in your room with shirt/bra off". Obviously she was interested in you as more than a friend at that point... whatever you did, one thing is certain - you didn't take it to the next level. For whatever reason things died down instead of escalating up, which is where they should have gone. Now you're her friend - the odds of you getting back to half a year ago are slim to none, especially since she won't even let you kiss her.

Don't make the same mistake twice.

 

[Alphathree]

Re: Re: Strange mixed signals (NOT an AFC post)

Originally posted by diablo
My opinion? You screwed up and haven't realized it. The part that convinced me was when you said that she "dated you about 6 months ago - went as far as making out in your room with shirt/bra off". Obviously she was interested in you as more than a friend at that point... whatever you did, one thing is certain - you didn't take it to the next level. For whatever reason things died down instead of escalating up, which is where they should have gone. Now you're her friend - the odds of you getting back to half a year ago are slim to none, especially since she won't even let you kiss her.

Don't make the same mistake twice.

She wasn't willing to go to the next level... I had tried. She's a virgin and wanted to stay that way, she told me.

I have a thing with breaking virgins. It's like the final frontier. Forgive me =) That's why I have some patience for this one as opposed to a regular girl.

See, any other girl giving me all those signals, a kiss would've been a 99.95% certainty in my book.

So part of me has this theory that she's possibly ready to lose her virgin status, but she's not gonna do that until she's justified to herself that she 'knows me' well enough.

 

[Alphathree]

Re: Re: Re: Strange mixed signals (NOT an AFC post)

Also note that we didn't talk for several months and we've just started spending time together again very recently.

So we haven't just been "friends" all this time. There was a big blank period.

 

[Cheat_LBJ]

Re: Re: Re: Strange mixed signals (NOT an AFC post)

Originally posted by Alphathree
She wasn't willing to go to the next level... I had tried. She's a virgin and wanted to stay that way, she told me.

If she's intent on staying a virign, then her interest level in you probably died down when she realized a relationship with you would involve pressure on her to have sex.

You've made your intentions known, she's made her intentions known. In her mind, those are incompatible.

I had a friend where the similar thing happened...girl didn't want to lose her virginity to him, so they fizzled out. Six months later, she gets drunk at a party and loses it to a guy 10 years older than her in a shower.

That's the way of these kind of things.

 

[diablo]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Strange mixed signals (NOT an AFC post)

Originally posted by Cheat_LBJ
If she's intent on staying a virign, then her interest level in you probably died down when she realized a relationship with you would involve pressure on her to have sex.

You've made your intentions known, she's made her intentions known. In her mind, those are incompatible.

I completely missed the line where he mentioned she was a virgin. Great advice.

 

[Alphathree]

I nexted her with Stephane's "loving thoughts" (from ideagasms.com)

I told her there is "absolutely no anger contained in what I'm about to say." (There wasn't.)

None the less, she didn't take it very well. She hasn't spoken to me since.

It felt great, though, because her constantly trying to spend time with me was distracting me, and since I wasn't even getting any poon from her, it wasn't serving a purpose.