"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Stopped bull****ting about..Now can you guys help me out?

SilverSonnet

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Wouldn't you like to know? ;)
Right, now that I've got my ass in gear, and I've stopped being such a little negative B*stard, I'm on the road to improve.

So, a few questions...

1.) How the heck do I deal with my talking problem? I just jabber on and on, and when I just shutup, people think I'm in a mardy. I can't win, and I cannot find the middle ground between the two. So, a solution to this please?

2.) Remaining mysterious..(Old Schooler, looking out for a post from you) How the heck do I remaing mysterious, not just to women, but to friends and other males? This kind of links in with my talking problem. I talk on and on, and I just talk alot about myself, which causes me to reveal alot about myself.
It's not just that, even when I don't talk forever, I let things slip.
A straight-forward Mini-Guide to this would be great.

3.) Working out. I have the routine, the support from a friend, and the equipment I need. Sometimes, I get really motivated and I'm like "Yes! Let's do this!". For a little while (a week) I'm motivated, then I just stop bothering. I cannot keep a long term motivation going. I dont know whether this is because I'm focusing on getting a nice body from Male respect and Female attention. Someone help me with this?

Thanks to the replies in advance. I appreciate your help, and hope to find some solutions.

Peace out, Ben.:rockon:
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Vice

Master Don Juan
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1. Ask the OTHER person questions about themselves. They'll be doing all the talking.

2. Stop telling people things about yourself. If you do, say it in an incomplete way, suggesting that you might be up to something. If you get number one fixed than this should follow.

3. Start running outside. It's helped me. Also, male competition from my "friend" who always tries stealing my girls has also inspired me. It's only a matter ot time before I kick this mother****er's ass.
 

slaog

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an island
SilverSonnet said:
Right, now that I've got my ass in gear, and I've stopped being such a little negative B*stard, I'm on the road to improve.

So, a few questions...

1.) How the heck do I deal with my talking problem? I just jabber on and on, and when I just shutup, people think I'm in a mardy. I can't win, and I cannot find the middle ground between the two. So, a solution to this please?

2.) Remaining mysterious..(Old Schooler, looking out for a post from you) How the heck do I remaing mysterious, not just to women, but to friends and other males? This kind of links in with my talking problem. I talk on and on, and I just talk alot about myself, which causes me to reveal alot about myself.
It's not just that, even when I don't talk forever, I let things slip.
A straight-forward Mini-Guide to this would be great.

3.) Working out. I have the routine, the support from a friend, and the equipment I need. Sometimes, I get really motivated and I'm like "Yes! Let's do this!". For a little while (a week) I'm motivated, then I just stop bothering. I cannot keep a long term motivation going. I dont know whether this is because I'm focusing on getting a nice body from Male respect and Female attention. Someone help me with this?

Thanks to the replies in advance. I appreciate your help, and hope to find some solutions.

Peace out, Ben.:rockon:
3) Make daily goals for working out.
 

theunflushables

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Not only stop talking about yourself so much, but talking so much in general. Just go on like normal chattin someone up and then go silent for a bit. It throws people off.
 

everywomanshero

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First, let me explain what is wrong with revealing too much, too soon.

Whenever someone discloses personal information, there is a feeling that it should be reciporcated by the other person. If this goes too far, too fast, it can be alarming and seem out of sync. It can also be bad if the information is too graphic or too serious when someone was anticipating a fun conversation. Most people want a great connection out of a conversation, and if that occurs in the context of much informatin exchange, that's fine, but if one person is blabbing and the other is bored to tears, not so good. There is no formula I can write out, and my conversations get personal fast, so I guess it's different for everyone.

Second, you want the information you leak to make a positive statement. Although one could lie, I think it's far better to actually build a wonderful life and let nature take its course. Not to mention it has the added benefit of being a state builder and leads to more overall life satisfaction.

How to do this? Find things that you enjoy and get busy doing them. Start taking massive action. Take that new job, go white water rafting, whatever it is you want to be doing but are not. Once you get excited about your own life, it will be easy for others to get excited about being in your life too. It's not the cool things you'll be doing that attract people, it's the happiness that comes from living a life of happiness and abundance. Balancing life can take some doing, work, hobby, and social all need their space.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

Read more...

theunflushables

Master Don Juan
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ehh...its something about the strong silent type from the old movies, Cagnee for example. Kind of how Marilyn Monroe started mens fascination with the blonde.
 

WesCottII

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Nottingham
SilverSonnet said:
Right, now that I've got my ass in gear, and I've stopped being such a little negative B*stard, I'm on the road to improve.

So, a few questions...

1.) How the heck do I deal with my talking problem? I just jabber on and on, and when I just shutup, people think I'm in a mardy. I can't win, and I cannot find the middle ground between the two. So, a solution to this please?

Because you're talking for the sake of talking. It's not interesting, or funny, it's just "noise". If you have something relevant to say, by all means say it. This means learning to be funny, learning to ADD to a conversation (by practicing EVERYWHERE, and not babbling. Learning social vibing is a must, and RAPPORT

2.) Remaining mysterious..(Old Schooler, looking out for a post from you) How the heck do I remaing mysterious, not just to women, but to friends and other males? This kind of links in with my talking problem. I talk on and on, and I just talk alot about myself, which causes me to reveal alot about myself.
It's not just that, even when I don't talk forever, I let things slip.
A straight-forward Mini-Guide to this would be great.

While being mysterious is a good thing, there arn't many "cool mysterious" 14 year olds. And anyone your age who you think is, won't be to anyone older . It's the same problem as before, talking for the sake of noise. Ask people about themselves, and be vague back. "what do you do for a living?" "oh just some part time work, so you said you were in Sales?"

3.) Working out. I have the routine, the support from a friend, and the equipment I need. Sometimes, I get really motivated and I'm like "Yes! Let's do this!". For a little while (a week) I'm motivated, then I just stop bothering. I cannot keep a long term motivation going. I dont know whether this is because I'm focusing on getting a nice body from Male respect and Female attention. Someone help me with this?

Bah. Working out, as me or anyone else in the H + F forum will tell you, is a PASSION. You can't do it without wanting it so bad. I started because I was the skinny kid who got no girls - kept me going. I'm not going to lie, I did it to get better chances with women. There's nothing wrong with that, it's a goal! The problem stems with it being a home gym. Once you make the effort to GO to a gym, you work hard because you're allready there, but at home, there's to many distraction. At first you must force yourself to do it, but soon it becomes habit.

Thanks to the replies in advance. I appreciate your help, and hope to find some solutions.

Peace out, Ben.:rockon:

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