stop using me as an emotional tampon dammit + age diffrence

[lordson]

rite so last night during a phone call she started crying again, and talked about how she thinks her sisters dont love her and how she loves them and her parents so much

shes done this before, but that was when she was talking about how much she hates herself

she says likes me but just wants to be mates for now, which is pretty much seeing each other but without the sex.

and not all women are the same, maybe thye are, what the hell do i know, but maybe shell only cry in front of peopel shes already close with (i.e me), and doesn't just want an emtional tampon

what should i do to get out of this freindship zone?

also, shes 22, im 19, shes finshed uni/college, i have 5 years left, and she reckons we're at diffrenct stages of our lives so we shoun't go out and her parents wont approve. she sed "if i had to choose between my family and you". you get the point

what can i say/do to convince her to go out me with

shes a HB9.5 and i'm not willing to NEXT this one

 

[Tomb]

Get her drunk.

 

[JonJack]

Originally posted by lordson
what can i say/do to convince her to go out me with

shes a HB9.5 and i'm not willing to NEXT this one

Why do you want her to go out with you? Why aren't you willing to next this girl? What is it that you want from her?

Your unwillingness to lose this girl is going to be your downfall. Not one specific event in life is 100% certain. So why are you holding on to it so tightly?

 

[Joe The Homophobe]

HB 9.5?? you better post her pic to back that up! 9s are rare very rare.

 

[Dr Box]

Hmmmm I know you don't want to but next her big time.......don't you see man you are a boyfriend simulator, all the crap that most bf's put up with but with out the reward. If you really want to try and keep her the only thing I can think of is tell her to stop crying and telling you all this crap (if she is as hot as you say she is, shes probably doing it for more attention) then start doing fun things with her get her out of the frame of "I can tell him anything...heck I can even cry in front of him and it's all good". into the frame of "wow this guy is awesome fun to be around.....I wonder when I will see him again" Personally I don't care how hot a chick is, if she hates her self then she has major issues and I don't have time for that rubbish........but hey good luck.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Next time she does it just tell her "I usually think you're kinda cute but your situation is bringing me down. Tell you what I'm going to do, I'm going to let you come with me [name a day] to [fill in the blank]. We're going to have a blast and by the end of the night you are going to be smiling uncontrollably. So when should I pick you up?"

Now, you're job is to show her a fantastic time. It's now on you dude...

 

[lordson]

thats what it bloody feels liek "boyfreind simulator"

she has heaps of frind and alot of guy mates too, but spends alot more time with me in person adn on phone, but she says "i hold you in as much regard as the rest of my friends, i pay you just as much attention as the rest of my frinds"

ive used kino on her, but once when i put my arm around her, she stood up and made up some stupid escuse to walk aroudn in fornt of me, ill try again at a later date

how do i get out of this "freinds only" zone?

 

[Nighthawk]

You don't. You are her asexual confidant. She'd probably prefer you were gay to ask you about fashion tips next.

You're only hope of romance is to cut all contact with her and go and sleep with some women she considers of a higher prizedom than her. This MAY shift her view of you to one a sexual being worth catching, but the damage may have been done.

 

[PeoplesChamp]

Originally posted by Joe The Homophobe
HB 9.5?? you better post her pic to back that up! 9s are rare very rare.

Yeah. We really need to find I way to standardize this scale b/c I think alot these people on here throw ratings around arbitrarily. I look to the DSM-IV for inspiration and see what I can do.

 

[Derek Flint]

Stop being her girlfriend.

And, go out and start meeting, dating and f***** other girls.

Let her know, by your actions, what is expected of her.

You're not willing to "next" her, but unless you show a willingness to walk away and to f*** other girls, you'll remain exactly where you are.

Next time she calls and starts whining, tell her you have a date and you gotta go, but you'll call her later, but don't actually call her back and see what happens.

Stop chasing her, and let her chase you.

 

[brenbaus]

Originally posted by Nighthawk
You don't. You are her asexual confidant. She'd probably prefer you were gay to ask you about fashion tips next.

You're only hope of romance is to cut all contact with her and go and sleep with some women she considers of a higher prizedom than her. This MAY shift her view of you to one a sexual being worth catching, but the damage may have been done.

This works, or one thing that has worked for me in the past is: dont call her, let her call you; when she does call, tell her you dont want to hear all the drama, you dont have the time for it. Use Kino when you see her, so she stops thinking of you as one of her girlfriends and starts thinking of you as one of her guyfriends.

 

[johnnyrem]

This is all good advice; you're a fool if you don't take it.

Any attempt to get in her pants is doomed to fail, because she does not see you as a sexual threat. If she considered you boyfriend material, believe me, she would NOT be pouring out her soul to you, because that would make her less attractive to any guy with a brain.

You're blinded by attraction and cannot see this.

I second the good advice above-chase other chicks.
Once you're capable of getting in her pants (by getting other women) you will no longer feel the need to, and getting other chicks is the best revenge of all.

To do otherwise is to be a classic AFC.

 

[lordson]

well i never call her, i always let her call me and invite me over

kino has no affect on her, and it might get to teh point where she would start hating the fact that i touch her

well im going to semi-next her and start calling on some other girls i met at a party a week ago