First off, my inspirations for this thread and required reading if you wish to truly understand how I arrived at this:
"AR Full Explanation" by Killswitch of mASF
http://www.fastseduction.com/discussion/read?317364,23
"AR F*cking" by Killswitch of mASF
http://www.fastseduction.com/discussion/read?306309,23
"AR F*cking Version 2" by Killswitch of mASF
http://www.fastseduction.com/discussion/read?314945,23
Many of the ideas found in this post are derived from the writings of Killswitch and his "Awareness Radius" idea.
Like I said, read the posts I linked to get an understanding of where I'm coming from....YES, YOU, NOW!!
Okay, now that that's out of the way, I have rapidly been coming to the conclusion that one of the best ways to generate attraction when making use of AR is to make the girl react to you by doing and saying as little as possible. When you say one sentence and they tell you a whole paragraph's worth of stuff, you're probably doing it right.
NOW, granted, when you make use of AR F*cking, you want to at times heap attention onto the girl. And at these times you want to be really talkative and communicative and make her feel validated.
But when you pull it away, you want to be able to lead her into talking a lot and reacting a lot whereas you pull it away.
For example... during the "IN" phase of the AR F*cking, the conversation is about 50/50. In the "OUT" phase of AR F*cking, ideally the conversation should be 20/80 you/her. Why is this good?
For one, lets refer back to three of Tyler Durden's (of mASF and Real Social Dynamics fame) 25 Points http://www.bristollair.com/outergame/techniques/specifics/25points/ :
16) TOO EAGER TO PAY ATTENTION - SAYING "what?" IF YOU CAN'T HEAR HER, PRIOR TO BEING IN RAPPORT = too much interest in what she's saying.. if she mumbles, just STACK OPENERS into an entirely DIFFERENT topic, RATHER than saying "what?" This is ****ing KEY KEY KEY. If you say "what?" you'll lose her unless you're already past attraction and into rapport. If this happens, just run a new opener and change the topic. 1- you don't look too eager, 2- you look alpha for being disinterested in what she's talking about which helps anyway
17) REPLYING WITH OVERLY THOUGHT-OUT OF LOGICAL ANSWERS OR WITH OVERLY CLEAR/FORMAL PRONUNCIATION = being concerned that you won't be accepted unless you convince really well (eg. HB: why did you ask me that... RIGHT = I'm talking. (sit and stare) WRONG = because I really need to know since I've been thinking about this for a while.. the FIRST one conveys that you won't qualify yourself to her)
18) TAKING TOO MANY SENTENCES TO STATE AN IDEA THAT COULD BE STATED IN LESS SPACE = qualifying yourself. Commander Zap emails me a few months ago: "Remember TD, don't write what you can say, don't say what you can wink, don't wink what you can smile" TIGHT. The shorter you can explain something in, the more PROFOUND you'll appear. Why? You're not qualifying yourself. (ironically I'm massively guilty of this, due to the fact that I post when I'm really tired - see #21 to spot what was wrong with this last sentence)
You avoid all 3 of these when you don't talk a lot or talk for no reason. The primary thing being that you aren't qualifying yourself. Meanwhile when you get the girl talking, it registers in her subconscious mind, whether she knows it or not, that she IS qualifying to you whereas you aren't. Previously when you were AR F*cking her and lavishing her with attention, you got her to feel free to open up and talk. Now suddenly you aren't talking as much, but since you put her in that open and talkative state a little while ago, she's still in it. While she's talking and you're not, your value is increasing relative to hers and she knows it. But like an AFC who doesn't know when to quit, girls will often KEEP TALKING even when you aren't and even try harder to GET your attention, especially when you withdraw as Killswitch says to do. Because, and this is the beauty of the AR concept, they get addicted to that validation. Most fools will keep talking and talking and talking. They will either stay at the 50/50 ratio or overwhelm it so that they're talking even more.
NOW, a friend and I came to the conclusion that while AR can be integrated into traditional sarging methods, AR is best used over the course of an extended period, either a few days, even a month. I believe Killswitch even states this. You want to use it on girls who already know you somewhat.
When you're meeting a complete stranger, you of COURSE want to be carrying most of the conversation to ease the comfort level. This is where mystery method, RSD and its ilk come in. You wanna follow the 90/10 rule during a traditional pickup scenario but NOT when you have the girl locked in somewhere where you'll see her again.. say a classroom. Or maybe this a girl you see in your social circle. The traditional sarging stuff can even come off kinda weird in those settings because those methods are designed for cold meets. If you're already familiar with being in another person's proximity, its not always needed. This is where AR shines.
Maybe I should re-title the post. Following the AR concept, you DO wanna talk to her, but only at certain times. Other times you wanna withdraw. Basically this is an explanation of an "AHA" moment I had when I was experimenting with AR and it suddenly clicked in my mind how EXTREMELY IMPORTANT it is to not talk too much. It does so many great things.
If you drop the convo and the girl picks it up, that's an IOI. If you say only a couple words and she says a lot, your value elevates in relation to hers. (OH, also read this great post from TD on 'Zombie Training' http://www.fastseduction.com/cgi-bin/search.cgi?action=retrieve&grp=4&mn=1124269451244677
When you give her good emotions and then start being more "zombified" and give only polite, brief responses, it makes her crave that validation she was getting before. Also, some guys (myself included) have a tendency to want to be really exacting when they explain things to people. If you do this often with girls, stop. Ask yourself what's more important , that you pass on all the logical data from your brain into hers, or that you don't lower your value?
Probably my main sticking point for the longest time has been that I talked too much. I would explain everything in detail. I would give detailed answers. I would talk about irellevant crap that didn't serve to raise my value. I would try to be ****y/funny and it would screw me over...
Oh, one other thing on ****y/funny... its good stuff... but as TD said in his "How to play Hard to Get, actually for real" post (which can be found on bristollair.com) ****y funny is really just competent flirting. It says a ton of good things about you, granted, but it often won't in itself make girls CHASE you. You have to flip their chase/screen switch. And many girls need to feel as if they're in the presence of a *real* "hard to get" guy in order to stop screening and start chasing. This is why pulling away and being unreactive is so important at times.
Let me end with this analogy, gentlemen.
How much do you figure an XBOX was worth when it was new? About $250-$300 right? Well on prom night at my high school a few years ago, there was this school-sponsored casino afterparty. However, since everyone there was too underage to ACTUALLY gamble, we played casino games to accumulate tokens, which we were to exchange at the end of the night for raffle tickets that we could use to bid on prizes. So, in theory, the better you played, the more tokens you got, the more raffle tickets you got, the more chances you got at winning a prize.
Well, the people in charge were incompetent. They somehow mixed up how many coins people were giving them. So they ended up scrapping the whole system and just gave everyone the same amount of raffle tickets. So in essence, that entire night of playing casino games was just for fun. There was no other real incentive to have played.
Well I was too busy talking with my date and other surrounding girls to be playing too much so I didn't WIN that many tickets. So when the people in charge scrapped the system I got a huge increase in tickets.
The only worthwile prize worth bidding for was the Xbox, so I put all my tickets into its raffle box.
At the end of the night, I won it. And some other guy got REALLY pissed off because he had played the whole night and had a lot of coins before the people in charge scrapped the system. But hell, I won the damn thing, and I had been wanting an Xbox for a few months but didn't have the spare money for it, so I figured it was just his loss, whatever.
Well, you guys know how much I play the damn thing?
Almost never.
Know how many games I have for it?
One.
Didn't matter how valuable I perceived the prize to be. I didn't earn it. So I didn't feel entitled to it and actually started to resent it over time. I didn't feel all that great when I got it and I'm sure most people wouldn't have either. It was basically random luck.
On the other hand, go to any carnival and observe a man winning a big dumb stuffed animal worth about $10. Observe how he pumps his fists in the air when he wins it after spending $20 playing a throwing dart game.
Fact is, a thing's base value means very little compared to whether or not it was actually challenging to get.
"AR Full Explanation" by Killswitch of mASF
http://www.fastseduction.com/discussion/read?317364,23
"AR F*cking" by Killswitch of mASF
http://www.fastseduction.com/discussion/read?306309,23
"AR F*cking Version 2" by Killswitch of mASF
http://www.fastseduction.com/discussion/read?314945,23
Many of the ideas found in this post are derived from the writings of Killswitch and his "Awareness Radius" idea.
Like I said, read the posts I linked to get an understanding of where I'm coming from....YES, YOU, NOW!!
Okay, now that that's out of the way, I have rapidly been coming to the conclusion that one of the best ways to generate attraction when making use of AR is to make the girl react to you by doing and saying as little as possible. When you say one sentence and they tell you a whole paragraph's worth of stuff, you're probably doing it right.
NOW, granted, when you make use of AR F*cking, you want to at times heap attention onto the girl. And at these times you want to be really talkative and communicative and make her feel validated.
But when you pull it away, you want to be able to lead her into talking a lot and reacting a lot whereas you pull it away.
For example... during the "IN" phase of the AR F*cking, the conversation is about 50/50. In the "OUT" phase of AR F*cking, ideally the conversation should be 20/80 you/her. Why is this good?
For one, lets refer back to three of Tyler Durden's (of mASF and Real Social Dynamics fame) 25 Points http://www.bristollair.com/outergame/techniques/specifics/25points/ :
16) TOO EAGER TO PAY ATTENTION - SAYING "what?" IF YOU CAN'T HEAR HER, PRIOR TO BEING IN RAPPORT = too much interest in what she's saying.. if she mumbles, just STACK OPENERS into an entirely DIFFERENT topic, RATHER than saying "what?" This is ****ing KEY KEY KEY. If you say "what?" you'll lose her unless you're already past attraction and into rapport. If this happens, just run a new opener and change the topic. 1- you don't look too eager, 2- you look alpha for being disinterested in what she's talking about which helps anyway
17) REPLYING WITH OVERLY THOUGHT-OUT OF LOGICAL ANSWERS OR WITH OVERLY CLEAR/FORMAL PRONUNCIATION = being concerned that you won't be accepted unless you convince really well (eg. HB: why did you ask me that... RIGHT = I'm talking. (sit and stare) WRONG = because I really need to know since I've been thinking about this for a while.. the FIRST one conveys that you won't qualify yourself to her)
18) TAKING TOO MANY SENTENCES TO STATE AN IDEA THAT COULD BE STATED IN LESS SPACE = qualifying yourself. Commander Zap emails me a few months ago: "Remember TD, don't write what you can say, don't say what you can wink, don't wink what you can smile" TIGHT. The shorter you can explain something in, the more PROFOUND you'll appear. Why? You're not qualifying yourself. (ironically I'm massively guilty of this, due to the fact that I post when I'm really tired - see #21 to spot what was wrong with this last sentence)
You avoid all 3 of these when you don't talk a lot or talk for no reason. The primary thing being that you aren't qualifying yourself. Meanwhile when you get the girl talking, it registers in her subconscious mind, whether she knows it or not, that she IS qualifying to you whereas you aren't. Previously when you were AR F*cking her and lavishing her with attention, you got her to feel free to open up and talk. Now suddenly you aren't talking as much, but since you put her in that open and talkative state a little while ago, she's still in it. While she's talking and you're not, your value is increasing relative to hers and she knows it. But like an AFC who doesn't know when to quit, girls will often KEEP TALKING even when you aren't and even try harder to GET your attention, especially when you withdraw as Killswitch says to do. Because, and this is the beauty of the AR concept, they get addicted to that validation. Most fools will keep talking and talking and talking. They will either stay at the 50/50 ratio or overwhelm it so that they're talking even more.
NOW, a friend and I came to the conclusion that while AR can be integrated into traditional sarging methods, AR is best used over the course of an extended period, either a few days, even a month. I believe Killswitch even states this. You want to use it on girls who already know you somewhat.
When you're meeting a complete stranger, you of COURSE want to be carrying most of the conversation to ease the comfort level. This is where mystery method, RSD and its ilk come in. You wanna follow the 90/10 rule during a traditional pickup scenario but NOT when you have the girl locked in somewhere where you'll see her again.. say a classroom. Or maybe this a girl you see in your social circle. The traditional sarging stuff can even come off kinda weird in those settings because those methods are designed for cold meets. If you're already familiar with being in another person's proximity, its not always needed. This is where AR shines.
Maybe I should re-title the post. Following the AR concept, you DO wanna talk to her, but only at certain times. Other times you wanna withdraw. Basically this is an explanation of an "AHA" moment I had when I was experimenting with AR and it suddenly clicked in my mind how EXTREMELY IMPORTANT it is to not talk too much. It does so many great things.
If you drop the convo and the girl picks it up, that's an IOI. If you say only a couple words and she says a lot, your value elevates in relation to hers. (OH, also read this great post from TD on 'Zombie Training' http://www.fastseduction.com/cgi-bin/search.cgi?action=retrieve&grp=4&mn=1124269451244677
When you give her good emotions and then start being more "zombified" and give only polite, brief responses, it makes her crave that validation she was getting before. Also, some guys (myself included) have a tendency to want to be really exacting when they explain things to people. If you do this often with girls, stop. Ask yourself what's more important , that you pass on all the logical data from your brain into hers, or that you don't lower your value?
Probably my main sticking point for the longest time has been that I talked too much. I would explain everything in detail. I would give detailed answers. I would talk about irellevant crap that didn't serve to raise my value. I would try to be ****y/funny and it would screw me over...
Oh, one other thing on ****y/funny... its good stuff... but as TD said in his "How to play Hard to Get, actually for real" post (which can be found on bristollair.com) ****y funny is really just competent flirting. It says a ton of good things about you, granted, but it often won't in itself make girls CHASE you. You have to flip their chase/screen switch. And many girls need to feel as if they're in the presence of a *real* "hard to get" guy in order to stop screening and start chasing. This is why pulling away and being unreactive is so important at times.
Let me end with this analogy, gentlemen.
How much do you figure an XBOX was worth when it was new? About $250-$300 right? Well on prom night at my high school a few years ago, there was this school-sponsored casino afterparty. However, since everyone there was too underage to ACTUALLY gamble, we played casino games to accumulate tokens, which we were to exchange at the end of the night for raffle tickets that we could use to bid on prizes. So, in theory, the better you played, the more tokens you got, the more raffle tickets you got, the more chances you got at winning a prize.
Well, the people in charge were incompetent. They somehow mixed up how many coins people were giving them. So they ended up scrapping the whole system and just gave everyone the same amount of raffle tickets. So in essence, that entire night of playing casino games was just for fun. There was no other real incentive to have played.
Well I was too busy talking with my date and other surrounding girls to be playing too much so I didn't WIN that many tickets. So when the people in charge scrapped the system I got a huge increase in tickets.
The only worthwile prize worth bidding for was the Xbox, so I put all my tickets into its raffle box.
At the end of the night, I won it. And some other guy got REALLY pissed off because he had played the whole night and had a lot of coins before the people in charge scrapped the system. But hell, I won the damn thing, and I had been wanting an Xbox for a few months but didn't have the spare money for it, so I figured it was just his loss, whatever.
Well, you guys know how much I play the damn thing?
Almost never.
Know how many games I have for it?
One.
Didn't matter how valuable I perceived the prize to be. I didn't earn it. So I didn't feel entitled to it and actually started to resent it over time. I didn't feel all that great when I got it and I'm sure most people wouldn't have either. It was basically random luck.
On the other hand, go to any carnival and observe a man winning a big dumb stuffed animal worth about $10. Observe how he pumps his fists in the air when he wins it after spending $20 playing a throwing dart game.
Fact is, a thing's base value means very little compared to whether or not it was actually challenging to get.
