Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Stop Taking It So Seriously

AFK Protector

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Short tip...

Stop taking this business so seriously. Just read up on what not to do, then get out there and forget about the other stuff here. Seriously, don't you have better things to do than pick up girls all day and make posts that outline what to do if she breathes at 45 degress west to the 35th parallel at noon?!

Please stop taking "seduction" so seriously. If you truly think aboubt it, it is all very contradictory. I'm sure you're familiar with, "do not think about what women think about you." Then why are we here learning about seduction? Is that not to impress the ladies? Is that not worrying about whether or not they will accept you for who you are? Is that not being insecure and feeling like you have to add a bag of magic tricks to get an upper hand on other guys?

Now, before the flame squad shows up, I gotta say, this tip isn't for everyone. Some have realized it's more about breaking free from the control of women enough to move on with our OWN lives. That will automatically lead you to a quality relationship with a quality girl.

This post is not intended for people who want 1 nighters or enjoy being PUAs, if you fall into that category or wanna be one, please ignore this, happy hunting.

Sometimes we get so caught up in this that we trap ourselves. It is counter-effective to take this so seriously. A rejection is a rejection...so what? A mistake is a mistake....learn from it. Although Pook and others have brought us along way from the AFCs of the past, there is a point in one's life where they must seek their own ideas and develop their own points of view insstead of being fed everything. Fear is what holds you back. Fear of failure, but remember nothing in life comes without a struggle. PEACE
 

penkitten

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thank god someone finally said it!

here i thought i was just crazy all these years for thinking all the over analysing of the c+ f was bs

who cares if you kino every chick at the bar?
 

I'm Joe Dirt

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Good post.

Another side effect of this "studying" of women and analyzing their every move and how to manipulate them is that they are dehumanized.

When many of the people here came as AFCs they really liked and adored some women they wanted to have relationships with. Now after reading all this and becoming DJs they care about women as much as they care about a can of soda - just use them when you need them and toss them like a piece of trash.
 

green69

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agreed, some people take this stuff way too seriously. Trying to find the latest ways to seduce girls as if to fill some kind of void in their lives.
 

DiSt0rTi0n_07

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I couldn't have put it better myself. Good post AFK!:up:

IMO, when ppl first come here, they want to learn what to do when they meet these scary beings. When they leave, they SHOULD walk away realizing that they are suppose to have fun with chicks, not supply tactical plans for infiltrating the mini-skirt.

Picking up chicks is like having sex: You shouldn't focus on your performance because you wont enjoy it. You should focus on having fun, because the bottom line is that having fun is the reason we want to hang around women in the first place.

Do it for yourself, do what AFK tells you! :D
 

Jariel

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Very well said!

Just read up on what not to do, then get out there and forget about the other stuff here.
This sums it up for me! So simple, but this is really is all you have to do.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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It's easiest when you don't take yourself so seriously.
 

Jay-X

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big it up for my man AFK! great piece of advice man
 

Tempest

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Hey, good post. I believe you have to take it seriously on some levels, though... but disregard most of the trivial stuff.

Remember, you're building a lifestyle. Mystery says your purpose in life is to SURVIVE and REPLICATE. The average lifespan from birth to death is 28,000 days. That's not a lot of time... and you've already wasted a LOT. So, remember your purpose and stay on that path. Don't worry about the trivial things, just get in the FIELD as fast as you can, and work on it.

I take this area of my life VERY seriously. It's not just about girls for me, it's about building a lifestyle, social skills, confidence, relationships and LIFE. Everything that I do is directed towards my purpose. I don't watch TV or waste time. Even this post here is a contribution to that purpose.

Just use this as motivation. Don't take the little stuff seriously, but at the same time take this area of your life seriously and do something about it.
 

Carnegie

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I agree!! Djing works best when we dont think about to much...I think pook said that in one of his threads..
 

benassi

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i really believe that a lot of the stuff on sosuave is more about teaching the afc's about how to CHANGE yourself to be able to know how to meet these girls u used to drool over, techniques are just a way of expressing your personality, and that every man for himself, should learn his own ways of getting with girls. go out and have fun with the girls you get with, and when your ready i think every man deep down inside really wants a true girlfriend, oh no, it's said. :X
 

JackPrescott

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Originally posted by green69
agreed, some people take this stuff way too seriously. Trying to find the latest ways to seduce girls as if to fill some kind of void in their lives.
Hell, you are right. Who needs women, lets just all sleep alone every night, and have continual, 365 days a year, "Boys nights out" with strictly males, or "Blockbuster night" with all male buddies. We'll have belching contests, and watch "Monday Night Football" with our prized male friends, and eliminate females from our lives entirely.

The entire purpose of So Suave is the pursuit of the kitty. Anything less, and you can go home, and watch Rupaul videos, while listening to old "Wham" albums.
 

green69

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Originally posted by JackPrescott
Hell, you are right. Who needs women, lets just all sleep alone every night, and have continual, 365 days a year, "Boys nights out" with strictly males, or "Blockbuster night" with all male buddies. We'll have belching contests, and watch "Monday Night Football" with our prized male friends, and eliminate females from our lives entirely.

The entire purpose of So Suave is the pursuit of the kitty. Anything less, and you can go home, and watch Rupaul videos, while listening to old "Wham" albums.
Basically you took my premise of "you guys take women too seriously, and focus on them too much." and changed it to "who needs woman!" when that's not what I'm saying at all.
 

S0LID

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The flame squad has arrived :cool: jk

Yeah man alot of guys come here searching for answers, there are no answers, there are probablities, and all the info usualy creates a new breed of AFC. Just as unsuccesful as their former self.
 

Visceral

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I don't think that's the biggest problem those guys face.

You're dealing with guys who have no appetite for anything more mentally and/or physically demanding than jerking off to porn, and who probably also view themselves as lower than dirt, totally unworthy of anything but the slow and painful death of a wasted life.

I think these are the problems that these unsuccessful guys have to admit to and work on fixing, not anything to do with techniques.
 
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nosexbox

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Well, right. Exactly.

You can give a guy 1000 different ways to hit on a girl, but if his self-esteem sucks, he's not going to take a chance on getting rejected. It hurts like hell when you're already down.

That's why every second post on this board seems to be "DO IT! JUST DO IT! YOU PUSS! WHY CAN'T YOU DO IT?!?!?!"

There's a big difference between the guys that are already in a decent position to pick up girls (i.e. good looking, with money, nice car, etc) and those who aren't. The tips on this site are great for pushing the former over the edge into chick-city, but don't really do squat for the latter.

I will say that the boot camp is pretty good for a transitional bit, though... it acknowledges that some of us (myself oh so definitely included) have a LONG way to go before we can just step up and start sarging on every nice pair that crosses our path.
 

Ouzo

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I am learning this stuff because I want to better myself. This no such harm in learning how to better yourself around woman.

I am a nice guy. I don't intend to change that. But I'm adding mystery to it. I don't believe in changing who I am but I believe in adding to who I am. Thats why I feel I am bettering myself.

But in saying that, I'm not overdoing in. I'm still me but this stuff has helped me to learn to respect myself and most importantly stand up for myself and what I believe in.

:cheer:
 

The-Sultan

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I like this post.

Some peopel just moan all day, but if you think about it they wouldnt be so shy if they didint take it so seriously.
 

donovan

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Yeah remember what you got into the game for. One way I have found that helps me not take it seriously, is have fun with the girl and get to know her, outside of doing the game.

I think I've been able to accomplish this buy,

1. Making the game a part of me, so I can actually FOCUS on them, instead of ticking off boxes...
2. Try to outline some qualities you want in a relationship (girl), then try and find them.

My two cents worth on that.

My blog.
 
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