Still shy

[oakraiderz2]

I myself think that im not nearly as shy and quiet as i used to be. I still have trouble approaching and what not but im working on that. It seems like each time i have a conversation with someone im nervous and tend to hold back. I cant understand it, i thought over time it would get easier but its staying the same. At school i was walking and talking with this girl and she said i seemed nervous even though i wasnt, just a little annoyed cause she asks stupid questions about her friend whose number i got. Also at parties i tend to stand around drinking, looking at people trying to find someone to talk to that i know. Mingling seems complicated when you dont know anyone.How can i be more social and make this easier?

 

[wind20mph]

Gimme a break! After posting so many times... you are still that Chump????

Here's a quick assignment to you.

In one week approach 20 HB... (9's or 10's) and ask them for direction. And then say thank you and leave.

In another one week, get a pen and notepad, then obeserve all the HB that pass by anywhere and get a quick scan of thing that intrigues you, (exclude physical parts). And write them all as many as you can.

In the 3rd Week do it combined.

And give us the feedback. That is for the most shy guys only.

 

[Tomb]

take the DJ Bootcamp Challenge on this site

 

[Schlep]

Don't let what that chick said get to you. I'm sure she didn't mean to, but she was manipulating you. It's basic psych/comm theory that saying something like that to someone makes them identify with whatever they've been told.

Ex. If I said, "oakraiderz, you're such a funny guy!" not only would you continue being as funny as you currently are, you would try even harder to be funny than you normally would.

Same thing here. Because she called you nervous, you've become even more nervous than you usually are. Just let it slide.

As far as at parties, just go up and talk to people. Most everyone at parties likes meeting new people, and unless you're not invited, it's not like you're intruding by mingling.

 

[rockstar88]

oakraider. some people are just more shy by nature. thats just some peoples personality i mean im sure once you get to know someone you are yourself. Lots of people are shy when they first meet people. I dont mind talking to people but i am sure as hell not the guy with the quickest witty comebacks or best approach lines. so i roll with a group of people whenever i go to a party or out to a club and we each have assumend personality roles. one of the guys is the SOCIAL GUY-not very attractive so he would never stand out by himself but he can start awsome converstation with anyone. than theres the COMEDIAN-he is quick whitted, great sense of humor ,think pluto from anamial house but he is the cute little bro looking kid than theres REALLY QUITE BUT AWSOME MUSICAN GUY- whens he's with us he is loud and funny but to other people he is awkward and shy unless he's talking about music. so he'll start playing guitar and girls at the party will flock. than SMART GUY-this guys a genius knows all about chem and physics than theresFIGHTER- this guy hates everyone and will fight at the drop of a dime plus he sucks with girls always gets real drunk and tries way to hard making me look better than theres meLAIDBACKGUY-

basicaly the point is alone all of us would be standing around at the party trying and faling to be successful with mingling but since we all have such different personalities we feed off of each other and we are always the life of the party. so use your friends to your advantage. The more friends you make the more people you feel comfortable around

 

[librito]

oakraiderz2
Master Don Juan

Registered: Feb 2002
Location: Clearwater Florida *****es
Posts: 2218
Age: 19


oakraiderz2.........POASTS 2218...........registered..... FEB 2002

and you are still having problems with shyness? what have you being doing all this time on this site and what have you posted about so much if it wasnt to help yourself?
I just dont get it.

 

[oakraiderz2]

Originally posted by librito
oakraiderz2
Master Don Juan

Registered: Feb 2002
Location: Clearwater Florida *****es
Posts: 2218
Age: 19


oakraiderz2.........POASTS 2218...........registered..... FEB 2002

and you are still having problems with shyness? what have you being doing all this time on this site and what have you posted about so much if it wasnt to help yourself?
I just dont get it.

Yea i am. I always kinda had a way around it so i never had to directly deal with it. For a WHILE i was doing good but then everything went down hill. Latley ive been workin on getting myself back up.

 

[thefonz]

Dude, you probably read the bible a while ago and forgot alot of it......make an appointment to read it EVERY week cus as inspiring as some of the stuff is, you will forget it if you don't constantly keep up with the reading