OnTheWayUp
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Oct 13, 2010
- Messages
- 321
- Reaction score
- 9
Hi everyone.
Studying for finals atm so am not going to be on here too much in the next few weeks, but just thought I'd post about something I've been thinking about recently.
Those of you who follow my posts will know that I've had a gf (my first non hook up girl) since February. She's really cool, and has a lot of things that make her stand out from the competition in terms of being a long-term gf. She is funny without being try-hard. She can hold a conversation without talking non-stop. She is accepting of her feminine role in the relationship rather than constantly testing my frame the whole time. Sexually she is eager to please and keen to try out new stuff all the time. She actually sent me a list recently of all the places she'd like to have sex. That's pretty cool. We have similar interests, a similar background, and similar views on religion.
The only downsides I can think of are: she is pretty average in terms of looks. Cute certainly, but no stunner. I would rate her a 6 or a 7 depending on clothes and make-up. She is a little too into pop culture for my liking, and watches quite a bit of tv. Finally, she comes from a very wealthy background, and very occasionally comes out with a comment that sounds quite entitled. The positives outweigh the negatives, such that I chose her out of the 3 girls I was seeing at the beginning of the year.
We are both graduating at the end of the summer, and the relationship will maintain itself until then. SS has taught me a vast amount about frame control, and this added to the fact that she's very low maintenance means that the relationship is very easy to maintain. It's nice to have a reliable, eager source of affection and a physical outlet when your main focus is your career.
After exams, she is staying in the UK, whilst I am moving to mainland Europe, likely for 3-12 months. My question is: what do I do after we graduate? We did a bit of long distance over the Easter break and tbh it really wasn't much fun. Skype and FB chat are no substitutes for real-life interaction, let alone substitutes for the physical aspect of the relationship. I have a friend (AFC story coming up) whose gf lives in Japan; they skype every day at the same time, and see each other maybe once every 3 months or so. My friend's a decent guy, but that's no way to live your life. I've read on here before that an LDR isn't a real relationship- that makes a lot of sense. Why enforce celibacy on myself for months at a time voluntarily?
Then again, this girl is the first I've been with who is normal and down to earth. I've spoken about the positives in her above, and I've struggled to find these qualities in other girls since discovering game 2 and a bit years ago, let alone all of them in one person. Part of me feels that the few months without sex would be worth the sacrifice, particularly if she flew over to see me once in a while (easy for her as she comes from a rich background). She would definitely do that for me if I asked her to, she's that sort of girl. She was also a virgin when we started seeing each other (at least so she claims, she is definitely very inexperienced)- so she would doubtless take the break up very badly. I don't want to be the guy who puts her off men for life.
I've spoken about this with a very good friend of mine from uni who is as big a player as it gets, and he suggests a third option: pushing for an open relationship. We would come to an agreement where we allowed each other to see other people, on the understanding that we will either find someone else and drift apart, or come back to each other a few months down the line when I come back to the UK. He also suggests actively cheating on my gf without telling her, but much as I'm tempted, I find it hard to imagine myself doing that to her. I have too much of a conscience- it's my weakness lol.
Summary:
-I have an awesome gf who I really like, but who I'm about to move away from
-Do we go long distance?
-Open relationship?
-Cheat?
-Or just break up?
All advice much appreciated.
Studying for finals atm so am not going to be on here too much in the next few weeks, but just thought I'd post about something I've been thinking about recently.
Those of you who follow my posts will know that I've had a gf (my first non hook up girl) since February. She's really cool, and has a lot of things that make her stand out from the competition in terms of being a long-term gf. She is funny without being try-hard. She can hold a conversation without talking non-stop. She is accepting of her feminine role in the relationship rather than constantly testing my frame the whole time. Sexually she is eager to please and keen to try out new stuff all the time. She actually sent me a list recently of all the places she'd like to have sex. That's pretty cool. We have similar interests, a similar background, and similar views on religion.
The only downsides I can think of are: she is pretty average in terms of looks. Cute certainly, but no stunner. I would rate her a 6 or a 7 depending on clothes and make-up. She is a little too into pop culture for my liking, and watches quite a bit of tv. Finally, she comes from a very wealthy background, and very occasionally comes out with a comment that sounds quite entitled. The positives outweigh the negatives, such that I chose her out of the 3 girls I was seeing at the beginning of the year.
We are both graduating at the end of the summer, and the relationship will maintain itself until then. SS has taught me a vast amount about frame control, and this added to the fact that she's very low maintenance means that the relationship is very easy to maintain. It's nice to have a reliable, eager source of affection and a physical outlet when your main focus is your career.
After exams, she is staying in the UK, whilst I am moving to mainland Europe, likely for 3-12 months. My question is: what do I do after we graduate? We did a bit of long distance over the Easter break and tbh it really wasn't much fun. Skype and FB chat are no substitutes for real-life interaction, let alone substitutes for the physical aspect of the relationship. I have a friend (AFC story coming up) whose gf lives in Japan; they skype every day at the same time, and see each other maybe once every 3 months or so. My friend's a decent guy, but that's no way to live your life. I've read on here before that an LDR isn't a real relationship- that makes a lot of sense. Why enforce celibacy on myself for months at a time voluntarily?
Then again, this girl is the first I've been with who is normal and down to earth. I've spoken about the positives in her above, and I've struggled to find these qualities in other girls since discovering game 2 and a bit years ago, let alone all of them in one person. Part of me feels that the few months without sex would be worth the sacrifice, particularly if she flew over to see me once in a while (easy for her as she comes from a rich background). She would definitely do that for me if I asked her to, she's that sort of girl. She was also a virgin when we started seeing each other (at least so she claims, she is definitely very inexperienced)- so she would doubtless take the break up very badly. I don't want to be the guy who puts her off men for life.
I've spoken about this with a very good friend of mine from uni who is as big a player as it gets, and he suggests a third option: pushing for an open relationship. We would come to an agreement where we allowed each other to see other people, on the understanding that we will either find someone else and drift apart, or come back to each other a few months down the line when I come back to the UK. He also suggests actively cheating on my gf without telling her, but much as I'm tempted, I find it hard to imagine myself doing that to her. I have too much of a conscience- it's my weakness lol.
Summary:
-I have an awesome gf who I really like, but who I'm about to move away from
-Do we go long distance?
-Open relationship?
-Cheat?
-Or just break up?
All advice much appreciated.