Steve Pavlina on How to be a Man

[DJCT]

I was surprised this didn't show up in the Mature Man forum. I rarely look at any of the other forums but did a search and saw somebody posted about this in the Don Juan tips forum. I wanted to post it here to see what some of the regular Mature Man posters thought about not only Steve's article but the response it generated in his forum.

The article:

http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2008/05/how-to-be-a-man/

The comment forum:

http://www.stevepavlina.com/forums/steve-pavlina/18050-how-man-blog.html

A few people seem to have taken this article as a personal insult.

(Mods: If you see this as a redundant posting and delete it, I understand. But there are probably others like me that don't venture much outside the MM forum and wouldn't see this otherwise. I have a feeling this could generate interesting discussion.)

 

[Luthor Rex]

2. Put your relationships second.
A man who claims his #1 commitment in life is his relationship partner (or his family) is either too dishonest or too weak to be trusted. His loyalties are misplaced. A man who values individuals above his own integrity is a wretch, not a free thinker.

A man knows he must commit to something greater than satisfying the needs of a few people. He’s not willing to be domesticated, but he is willing to accept the responsibility that comes with greater challenges. He knows that when he shirks that duty, he becomes something less than a man. When others observe that the man is unyieldingly committed to his values and ideals, he gains their trust and respect, even when he cannot gain their direct support. The surest way for a man to lose the respect of others (as well as his self-respect) is to violate his own values.

Life will test the man to see if he’s willing to put loyalty to others ahead of loyalty to his principles. The man will be offered many temptations to expose his true loyalties. A man’s greatest reward is to live with integrity, and his greatest punishment is what he inflicts upon himself for placing anything above his integrity. Whenever the man sacrifices his integrity, he loses his freedom… and himself as well. He becomes an object of pity.

This is probably one of the biggest qualities the AFC lacks.

 

[DJCT]

Well, now they posted a how to be a woman post with more to come I guess:

http://www.stevepavlina.com/forums/steve-pavlina/18202-how-woman-sheryn-bruehl.html

Reading the various responses and judging my own reaction to them gives me a good indicator of where I am in my understanding.

Also everybody on that forum seems to have divergent ideas on what it means to be a man or women. It seems that some people aren't comfortable with saying that men and women are different and aren't comfortable discussing the differences.

 

[reset]

And the pro-masculine voices are in the minority.