"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Stating your interest in a girl outside of purely sex

blueline

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I get laid at a decent clip. A couple weeks ago, I was actually having sex with two different girls during the same week. I feel like the biggest hangup I have is not actually getting laid, I can do that pretty reliably. I'm pretty good at sex, too. I'll do whatever it takes to get the girl off and I almost always figure out what she likes. Rather, my biggest hang up comes when I start having sex with a girl I actually connect with and like.

It seems as if when I actually like the girl's personality and start to appreciate her presence in my life, her interest starts to wane. After we hung out and had sex several times (we even slept over each other's places), one of the recent girls I really connected with at a mental and physical level refused to have anymore sex with me because she felt like she was leading me on. I think what really prompted this feeling in her was that the last time we had sex, I told her "I could get into you pretty easily if you know what I mean." She responded to that comment by saying "yeah, I know exactly what you mean, but I don't want anything serious with anyone atm."

What if I had played it cool and instead of staying over her place or letting her sleep at mine, I had just told her she/I should get going? What if I hadn't made that comment? What really struck me as bizarre about this girl is that the Saturday after we had sex the previous day, I ran into her at a party and my friend overheard her complaining that there weren't any guys attractive enough to hookup with at the party. What the hell?

Was this just a case of the girl thinking she was too hot for me outside of a quick lay? The guys she actually dates are usually way better looking than me. There must've been some attraction for her to enjoy the sex that much and do it several times with me. I guess there is some great comfort in knowing that once this girl reaches around 25 and is looking to settle down, she's going to check out my facebook and say to herself, "Oh ****, blueline was cool as hell, he's got a good career going now, has a cute girlfriend, and he had a **** with a 6 inch girth. I dropped the ball on that one." I want to delete her, but I know this is going to happen.

Is it generally just a good idea to play it cool until the girl straight up asks you to be her boyfriend?
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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SweetTooth

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Once you start liking a girl for more than sex you usually end up getting hurt in the end.
 

Blusher

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SweetTooth said:
Once you start liking a girl for more than sex you usually end up getting hurt in the end.
That's debatable to say the least...

It's your experience. My experience: amazing relationship with a girl that I appreciate for her hotness ... among many more important things. Two years into it, I don't see why I should have avoided such a tremendous blast.

stop living in fear. Start enjoying.
As long as you don't rush it and recite poems und
er her window after 3 dates :)
 

Uberguy

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blueline said:
Is it generally just a good idea to play it cool until the girl straight up asks you to be her boyfriend?
Yes. Sometimes she'll be looking for you to ask her to be your girlfriend first, but in such cases, her interest level will be obvious. As other posters on this site have noted, if a girl wants you, you'll know.

In the meantime, play it cool.
 
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