"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Start me up! please.

Shaik

Don Juan
Joined
Oct 29, 2007
Messages
54
Reaction score
0
SO, I've been around here before, just browsing through... you know. But now I'd like to get into depth on this whole lifestyle of the Don Juan.

What I'd like to know is, WHERE the hell do I start?! WHAT's the first step that's needed to push me towards a better life? And, also, the whole subject of HOW?!

If there's anything you'd need to know to give a better opinion to me, please, DO ask!
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

Accension

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jul 7, 2009
Messages
288
Reaction score
20
Location
Australia, ?
Assets
If you don't have a job bloody get one, I need not list the benefits.

Health
Get your tubby or twiggy as5 in shape, " ".

Comfort
You'd ordinarily hear confidence but comfort comes before confidence.
In essence if you're not comfortable with anything, do it until it's comfortable and thus until you're confident.

You may fail at women but dam boy did I suck but hell I went out there and it was uncomfortable and now I'm coming home sore from threesomes! I love that a complete loser can do this if he's willing to try. Not just try but try till he succeeds. Pull an Accension and accend yourself to new heights.

Live
Heck man, get out there. Hit every club in your city in one nights. Seduce that waitress. Have a shot of Tequila. Start a 100 lay tally. See a new movie. Learn to fly a plane. Watch Yes Man. Write a novel. Take up an extreme spot. Shoot a photo. Get up at 5 AM and go surfing. Buy a jet-ski. Get in a fight. Join a gym. Climb a mountain. Take a painting class. Download a new song. Try a new coffee shop. Walk an obscure route. Fly to a different country for the weekend. Write a long list. Re-arrange your furniture. Start a different diet. Eat out. LIVE!

Let's see financial security, health, comfort and a life. There's one explosion of a start, 4 intence goals and 4 times the success you can gain in the women area.

Because being successful isn't a net sum of techniques but a life style.
Goals are there to be achieved, the things you can accomplish if you try.
This post could have very well been written from the you who invented a time machine to set you on the right track!


 

Shaik

Don Juan
Joined
Oct 29, 2007
Messages
54
Reaction score
0
^Sweet, thanks for the reply!!

I just started college and I'm pretty swamped in terms of studying, so a job isn't of any interest to me right now. (my financial security comes from my parents)

Started working out a few months back and I'm doing pretty good. A few mishaps here and there in terms of self-discipline, but I've always reverted back to the right track. (been cutting out sugar and fat from my diet as well, though I know I can do better...)

SO, besides those 2 points, I'll test out that comfort before confident thing and see where that leads me. (I can imagine it'll be nothing but helpful!) I've been cooped up in my house or at a library most of this month, but I'll try getting out every chance I get. I haven't been clubbing EVER, maybe it's time to try lol... (not old enough to drink yet though hah.)

Well, thanks again man. Hopefully I'll manage to break through my barrier some where down the road!
 

Igetit!

Moderator
Joined
Jul 13, 2008
Messages
2,880
Reaction score
920
Location
The United State of Texas
Shaik said:
If there's anything you'd need to know to give a better opinion to me, please, DO ask!
Ok,I'll take you up on this:Tell me...

What do you really want? Do you really want to be a player/Don Juan?

Because for me,I used to think that was what I wanted. But when I really took time to think about it,when I seriously sat down and thought about it,I realized that all I really wanted in reality was acceptance.

Before I came into a better knowledge and understanding about women and the whole "dating/attraction" thing,I was the Mayor of Let's JUST Be Friendsville. It was RIDCULOUS how much I was friendzoned. It happened so much,that whenever I would interact with a girl I could "sense" it starting to happen even before it came to pass. But I couldn't stop it because I didn't know what I was doing that was causing it.

So because of that,I thought I wanted to be a "player",or a "Don Juan",if you will. But in reality,I didn't. I just wanted to be accepted.

I just wanted to be able to walk up to ONE girl,and have her interested in me.

So when I finally found out why I was repeatedly falling into the friendzone over and over again,and realized that it was COMPLETELY in my control,I understood what it was I truely wanted.

Acceptance.

That's it.

I didn't want to "bang new chicks" every night,I didn't want to run around like a dog in heat humping anything that moved.

I just wanted to walk up to a girl and have her be interested in me instead of always getting rejected and classified as a "friend".

That was me.

However,you want whatever it is you want. If you really want to be a "player",I'm sure that info here on the forum can be used to give you that lifestyle.

But like i said,in order for you to get to where you want to go,first you need to determine where you currently are.

So I ask...

What do you want?
 

Shaik

Don Juan
Joined
Oct 29, 2007
Messages
54
Reaction score
0
^Wow, I checked back right after you posted your reply lol

I've thought about what I really wanted before and it's plain and simple love?

I'm not even sure on this. I've been a loner most of my life; parents worked and argued all day, everyday, I'm Asian, grew up in white/black communities, I've moved about thirty times in my lifetime so far, etc.

SO, I have all these issues building up inside me to the point of suicidal thoughts and I just want to solve them now. It's too many to list, but I believe that once they're solved, I'll be a ton happier.

I'm taking a psych course right now that's helping me understand some of the causes of my problems, but simply understanding doesn't solve the problems.

SO, here I am looking for love. I'm assuming once I get my hormonal thirst satiated, I'll be somewhat satisfied and motivated to live out life. (And maybe I'll make some great friends along the way, but that's for another site lol...)

Edit: I actually thought some more and wanted to add a few more wants.

I want to impress people. I feel great whenever I shock/awe someone or a whole group. (I guess it'll mean I want attention too?)

I would love to have a better family life. We are so detached from each other, it's mentally fatiguing. (I'd say physically too)

I want control of my mind. Feels like it's really tangled up in here.

I want to be happy ultimately. In detail, I'd like this happiness to branch from myself (my doings/actions/accomplishments), my family, and maybe from outsiders (friends, ordinary people, etc).

I think I want fame+fortune, but I'm not sure. I've seen/heard a lot of negativity from it that would make me reconsider that lifestyle.
Another thing I'm not so sure of wanting is a vast amount of power. (as in being a political leader or a social influencing idol) I'm pretty sure there's no limit to the power you can obtain, but right now, if given that power, I'd be fearful for my own sanity and everyone's well being. I just don't know what to do with all that authority. Yet, it's so appealing and tempting...

Lol another edit (I sure am greedy...):

I want balance in my life. It's getting there so far from my own self, but I know I need help if I want to go all the way hah.
 
Last edited:

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

Read more...

Igetit!

Moderator
Joined
Jul 13, 2008
Messages
2,880
Reaction score
920
Location
The United State of Texas
Shaik said:
I've thought about what I really wanted before and it's plain and simple love?
Love???

So that's what you want,huh? Well join the club.

I hate,HATE to sound "Dr.Phil-ish",and I'm sure you've probably heard this a thousand times before as I have,but you know in oder to get love,you need to ALREADY have love for yourself.

It's like respect. If you want people to respect you,first you have to respect yourself.

Shaik said:
I'm not even sure on this.
Now this is a problem. A HUGE problem. That's why I asked you what do you want. You said that you're not sure. Well,until that question gets answered,you CAN'T BE HELPED.

This situation you're in is like you having a map,and having an expert map reader right next to you. The map reader asks you where you want to go,and you reply,"I'm not sure".

It doesn't matter how good of an expert map reader you have with you,if you don't know where you want to go,he won't be able chart out a clear route for you to take. If you need time to figure it out,then fine. Take your time. But that question HAS TO BE ANSWERED sooner or later. Otherwise,you'll just be stuck where you are.

Shaik said:
SO, I have all these issues building up inside me to the point of suicidal thoughts and I just want to solve them now. It's too many to list, but I believe that once they're solved, I'll be a ton happier.

I'm taking a psych course right now that's helping me understand some of the causes of my problems, but simply understanding doesn't solve the problems.
Well,at least this is a start. I don't know if these psych courses will solve your problems or not,but at least you know there are problems present. That's half the battle right there.

Shaik said:
SO, here I am looking for love. I'm assuming once I get my hormonal thirst satiated, I'll be somewhat satisfied and motivated to live out life. (And maybe I'll make some great friends along the way, but that's for another site lol...)
I think that the forum can help you find this "love",however,it won't be the way you think it will be.

The main focus here is on YOURSELF,not women. Everything...


EVERYTHING...


Everything originates and flows out from YOU.

It's not this girls.

It's not sex.

It's you.

All the girls and dating will fall in line and be a positive side effect as a result of YOU getting YOURSELF whole and complete.

As long as you look outward to something or someone OUTSIDE OF YOURSELF in order to find this "love",you'll "feel" incomplete,like something is missing no matter how many girls you sleep with.
 

Shaik

Don Juan
Joined
Oct 29, 2007
Messages
54
Reaction score
0
Love I'm not so sure on because I don't even know if it exists! LOL. It's kinda like hunting for Atlantis to me, you know?

But I get your point on how it's like respecting myself first. I guess if there is such thing as love, I'll create a dose and try it on myself lol (then spread it around and see what happens? haha)

Okay, so from all this I've taken in a better perspective, I think. I'll keep experimenting (whole trial and error) and see where it'll get me. I was just lost, you know? But just hearing advice from those who KNOW is greatly helpful, idk if you know this lol (it really helps!).

SO, back to the right track. I'll keep track of my progress off-site and hopefully pop back in whenever I'm stuck. If this doesn't work out, I hope that an on-site progress report will steer and keep my ass in shape LOL
 
Top