"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Spun all my plates, and back to square one... Need dating advice...

4

411826

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So the past week, I have taken out 4 girls. These 4 girls are 7/8, maybe one 9, depending on who you ask. For sure, girls I would show my friends and family to.

Anyway, as I see it, my approach is congruent enough. I say hi, I follow through with my intentions, tell them I find them beautiful and go for the number. It's almost auto pilot for me...

Where I ****ed up with 4 girls in 7 days is that I could not get them to feel comfortable, to say the least. Good enough conversations to get their attention, so I don't think it was that (I mean, how good does a conversation have to be, right? Just talk a bunch of **** and find out about each other) But maybe a bit too pushy? I think I am coming off as forceful instead of powerful. Every time I go for the hand, they told me "Stop, I can walk on my own" or "What are you doing?"

I also hope my body language isn't too much either, it's the only thing that makes me feel comfortable as a man. (Man spread, wide, and great expressions)

Anyway, do you guys have any dating tips on how to make a girl feel comfortable? I spun through all my girls and now have to go out there and do it again from square one, because now I can't even get a 2nd date with these people. Clearly, something went wrong on my end...
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

S

Steeze

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Yeah, stop trying so hard and be yourself. It goes without saying that this includes losing that "hello, you're beautiful" bit. Forever. Reading the post was kinda awkward to the point I wonder if it is serious. That means if it is serious, your approach is quite the antithesis of "congruent," such as to be hopelessly incongruent.

Just be chill, natural, and carefree in the moment. Stop analyzing so much. You clearly are not comfortable with yourself in these situations as evidenced by your articulable awareness of precisely what is wrong. You suspect it doesn't work. It doesn't. In fact, their justifiable responses to the unwanted touching by a man they do not know could be a harbinger of legal problems. It's that bad. The first step is to stop doing that forthwith. Learn from it. Keep trying.
 
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KingBeef

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To be clear.....If you haven't slept with a woman, she's not a plate. They are just dates with women, nothing more.

As far as dating is concerned, don't put too much pressure on yourself. You should be enjoying the interaction with her....it is not an audition/interview. Topics to talk about? Her, funny anecdotes, your passions and what drives you in life. You should be qualifying her, not the other way around.
 
J

Julian

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You dont hold a chicks hand until after you smashed her bro

ESCALATE is what you need to do. The small talk shouldnt be longer then 5 minutes. Then you arrange to meet for EVENING DRINKS. Then relocate to your pad to attempt f close.
 
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