"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Sports / Activities / Interests that build self confidence.

Demodulate

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What activities do you do that build self confidence.

I use to train Muay Thai a few years ago and it helped my confidence big time.. I could look anyone in the eye I knew I could go toe to toe with anyone and hold my own. I had girls I had just met making out with me in clubs, a 20 something FB, and I was in the best shape of my life.

Then my back let go and I ended up having surgery, and all new confidence eroded away.. It was a long road back to normal for me, I couldn't really do Muay Thai anymore, it was to rough. I went back to school for my MBA, and when I could I started working out, and doing Brazilain Jiu Jitsu..

Confidence returned.. I ended up meeting an awesome girl in the MBA program, we graduated together, life was on track.. Hurt my back again in BJJ, 2 months later the girl dumped me, I returned to BJJ and the second time back I tore my shoulder up requiring surgery.

so here I am back to square one, recovering from surgery, unable to really work out. Confidence is pretty low..

Does anyone have anything they do that gives them a confidence boost?

hopefully something low impact..
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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zekko

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Does anyone have anything they do that gives them a confidence boost?

hopefully something low impact..
How about shuffleboard?
:)
 

Demodulate

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Strelok said:
Fire weapons?

dont really see that doing anything to build confidence..

I have a closet full of guns, and it never made me feel like more of a man, like knowing I could knock someone out did..
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Scaramouche

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Dear Demodulate,
There is really only ONE activity that I know of that combines:Fitness,building Social Skills and exercising the Brain....Dancing......For you the gentlest Dancing is without doubt Argentine Tango.....It is a walking Dance and your therapist should know about it before he condemns it....But,but,but, it is hard for a Man to learn....The rewards are really great,in that there are nearly two Women to every Male....Most of the Women are quality,usually well educated and polite.certainly better than much of the dross you get in Bars and Clubs...I took this type of dancing up when I developed Arthritis in both Hips....It was good,so gentle on the joints indeed,that five weeks after having my joints replaced,I was back Dancing.
 

Demodulate

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Scaramouche said:
Dear Demodulate,
There is really only ONE activity that I know of that combines:Fitness,building Social Skills and exercising the Brain....Dancing......For you the gentlest Dancing is without doubt Argentine Tango.....It is a walking Dance and your therapist should know about it before he condemns it....But,but,but, it is hard for a Man to learn....The rewards are really great,in that there are nearly two Women to every Male....Most of the Women are quality,usually well educated and polite.certainly better than much of the dross you get in Bars and Clubs...I took this type of dancing up when I developed Arthritis in both Hips....It was good,so gentle on the joints indeed,that five weeks after having my joints replaced,I was back Dancing.

this is excellent.. I might even have a lady friend who would go with me..
 

KarmaSutra

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There's nothing more alluring to women than a man who has swagger, who's unafraid to dip her.

My buddies gave me sh!t when I started taking Ballroom lessons.

Then they saw the ass I pulled. Now they're taking lessons.
 

jophil28

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KarmaSutra said:
There's nothing more alluring to women than a man who has swagger, who's unafraid to dip her.

My buddies gave me sh!t when I started taking Ballroom lessons.

Then they saw the ass I pulled. Now they're taking lessons.
Yep, hands down, ballroom and latin dancing is the #1 way to improve your confidence, skills and pull a$$.
Improves your posture, provides a regular weekly activity and gives you INSTANT access to a lot of women who will compete for you.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Scaramouche

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Dear Demodulate,
Thankyou for being receptive to the Argentine Tango....Salsa is certainly the Dance for most people to learn,perhaps it is OK for you,on the OtherHand! It is very fast....Avoid R&Roll and any Dance where you are stomping....Never,Never Disco or T Bag...Write To Jo and ask him about the effectiveness of Gelatine....If I had got onto it earlier I would have avoided Surgery!By the way the Culture in Tango is to constantly change partners....I would Ideally take a Girl who is a Tango Dancer already,two beginners are not that Cool,in the early stages of lessons,four out of five women drop out and nine out of ten Men!So initially you find more Men but as your skill develops you are into Green Pastures.
 

Serialized3

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Wilderness survival training activities did wonders for my confidence.

Go out into the woods with just enough equipment and food to get by (your call) and see how long you can last (or get bored).

Mountaineering also makes me feel like a beast.
 
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