"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Spinning plates

Devintems

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Hello, I'm brand new to this site, but I have been reading Rollo's The Rational Male.

I'm 31, divorced, and work two jobs to pay child support. I also live with my mom because of it, which is a whole other topic. My evenings off are Tuesday's and every other Friday. This makes it very difficult to spin more than 1 or 2 plates at a time. I've been able to do more in the past, but it ended up being more than I could handle.

Any suggestions?
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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Tictac

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One isn't spinning plates. Two is. And just because you are 'spinning plates' does not mean you see every plate every week. You can do lots of spontaneous 'dates' that don't involve spending much or sometimes any money.

If two is what you can handle, go for two and keep your options open.

You've got a lot going on and where you live right now isn't going to help. But don't sweat the details. As you 'get on your feet' the things you do now will set the stage for better things.
 

Cejay

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I've been through that too.

If you are dating a divorced women then she is likely going to understand the need to live with your mom as she will have needed some help too. (Probably)

Women who haven't been divorced aren't going to understand and are going to filter you because of it, even though your living situation should be commended, rather than something you can't afford and racking up debt which is the female way to handle it.


Remember, women are going to sh1t test you and ask you all kinds of things. You do NOT I repeat DO NOT need to answer all of their questions. Avoid anything that you deem none of their business.

CJ
 

Devintems

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hithard said:
Is your current living / financial situation temporary or long term?
Definitely long term. Financially I'm in a downward spiral. I'm working on a few things to ease the pressure, but it will be awhile.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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teebear

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Maybe reframe your living arrangement to appear as though it is YOU helping out your mom in some manner, not the other way around.
 

Devintems

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teebear said:
Maybe reframe your living arrangement to appear as though it is YOU helping out your mom in some manner, not the other way around.
I could try. But I am honest to a fault. It makes me paranoid.

Honestly, living with my mom has been a problem, but it is far from my biggest one. My biggest problem is time. And being blown off hurts far more than it normally would because it's usually the only free time I will have for weeks, and suddenly it's wasted. Nothing is more infuriating!
 

Poon King

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I find it odd you are making women such a big priority when you have so much other crap going on that you need to fix ASAP.

Get your sh!t together so you can live a life of freedom and abundance. Make that your only goal right now. As far as women go.. you should just be f*cking and chucking. If I was in your situation I wouldn't be worried about keeping several dumb b!tches interested in me while my life is in a state of disrepair.

Women are ALWAYS a financial and emotional drain on you UNLESS you have your sh!t together. So all guys who don't have their sh!t together should either become gigolos, marry rich women or stick strictly to f*cking and chucking.
 

Devintems

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Well the ****ing and chucking is the primary idea.

My financial situation isn't going anywhere. "Getting my **** together" is about as doable as telling someone with cancer to just be healthier. I can't change my financial situation. But I'm not going to stop living just cause I have problems
 

Scaramouche

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Dear Devintemps,
TBear has a sound suggestion there...Forget about the being honest to a fault...That sort of attitude is incompatible with spinning plates...Make your choice,be a little creative in your approach or resign yourself to a celibate lifestyle!
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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