Speed Dating?

[tamales]

Ever done it. A gf of mine wants me to go with her but I am not sure I can get through it without laughing my ass over. Like Duck Duck Goose or something, I might feel silly. Wondering what your experience has been? I have never done the internet thing nor plan to. Amazing how many single, nice and attractive people out there are looking for love or some companionship.

Not that easy no matter how good your game is?

So what's the verdict on this? And how could you not keep from laughing when participating..

 

[The Real Deal]

It might be worth the laugh, but I doubt anything else.

 

[Helter Skelter]

I would like to try it.
How could anything be bad that gets you out there meeting new girls and practicing your skills. The more diffrent things you try the more overall success you will have.

 

[PANK]

I will make my response in poem format

say this to women you just meetr

Oh dear dearest of love affection romance
i want you for personality and not sex
i am a man who respects women as an apple falling off the tree of my affectioon
i am a kangaroo who jumps for joy when i hear of you comming to see me for even a second
maybe soon we could possible have an unsavery relationship and EVEN HOLD HANDS
i love everything qbout you i want to spend the rest of eternity with you
I am so in LOVE LOVE L O V E
I AM IN LOVE with the only woman i ever met
Can we set sail for love unknown to any mankind please refrain from ever leaving my side
i will definately kill myself if you do

Now that will get you a woman.

 

[racerX]

speed-dating

In 2 weeks from now, i am going to try this speed-dating thing in los angeles. 10 chicks, 6 minutes each. They had some that were 20 girls-3 minutes each, but i thought i would forget each girl face after it was over. 10 girls seems like enough. It should be fun & maybe even funny. I havent never tried it, so it should be an interesting experience. It costs $29. I figure if i can interact w/ 10 girls for a total time of 1 hour, its better than spending $20-$30 for a month subscription to an internet dating website. I will post the results of this in 2 weeks.

 

[SLIKKER_THAN_AVG]

I would do it..i think there was one in my area a while ago..but the prices was like 45 bucks or something..F that.

Anyways, you should do it. You may as well.

 

[Clint Eastwood]

Tamales, I'm sure you'd have no problem getting a guy at one of these crazy events. But the odds of him being a DJ or a man's man are probably about 2%. So, don' t be disappointed if all you meet are AFCs and dorks.

Like I keep telling you, Be patient. If you're as good looking as you claim to be, it's only a matter of time before a DJ approaches you. You've been on this site long enough that you should be able to weed out the good guys from the losers. At least a little better than you did in the past.

Oh, and by the way, you're smart for staying away from the internet dating. I tried it as a result of some bad advice, and it turned into a nightmare.

Good luck and hang in there.

 

[squirrels]

I can't see any true alpha male (or alpha female) ever subjecting themselves to some kind of organized dating service. They're quite capable of attracting people in the real world. I would think that people who get involved in "speed dating" or any kind of organized dating service are people who are otherwise "having trouble" for one reason or another. You'd probably find the odd alpha (fe)male, but they're there just for to experience the ridiculousness of it all, or because some friends goaded them into it, not for any kind of relationship.

In other words, it's in the hands of luck.

 

[Helter Skelter]

Squirrels,

Everyone on this board is having some sort of trouble and would like to improve themselves in someway. Bars and clubs are filled with losers and lairs just like the internet or SPEED DATING I suppose, although I don't have any experince with that.

I'm not sure if I'd even want to be with a girl who let me pick her up in a bar.

Is that where the alpha males go?

Even though many on this board oppose it, the best quality girls I've been with, I met at work.

 

[Helter Skelter]

I think internet dating will be a widely accepted and one of the most common ways of meeting people in the future. Like it or not.

I prefer the old fashion way but that's not always possible for a lot of people.

Shopping for a girlfriend on the internet just like going to the mall and buying new clothes.

 

[MisterAl]

Speed dating can be a blast!

I've been on a speed dating binge for the past few weeks, attending about six events so far. My results keep getting better and better! I think the best benefit is the amount of practice I've gotten in talking to women.

The first couple of events I went to I got no matches at all, but I didn't really know what I was doing then. Now my speed dating second dates are beginning to equal or even outnumber my online match.com dates!

Most importantly, and in my opinion the most overlooked opportunity, is the mingle time you get before, during and after the speed dating event. It is _essential_ to get your a$$ out there working the crowd. Most of the women show up with their friends. While Mr. AFC is standing around like a loser with a helpless look on his face, I've got Miss Cutie and her two friends standing around me while I find out where they are from and then crack jokes about them.

At my last speed dating event most of the guys were total AFC, and I ended up doing very well. Of course by now I've got the conversation down to science where before I flailed around like a moron not making any sort of connection at all.

These days I start off telling her she has an interesting name and that she must have been named after someone (Of course she was!). And then I've got her laughing within a minute or two with whatever I think is going to crack her up. Of course if we're not going to hit it off, I know it right away and I can ignore her for the rest of the evening.

Seriously, for $25-30 you get to spend 2-3 hours meeting 10-25 usually beautiful, interesting and single women all within five years of your own age. It's a bargain.

I've done the 3-minute and 8-minute events. I think the 3-minute events are a waste of time. In that time you can get as far as my name is, then boom, you're done. Eight minutes gives you more time to make the impression if you're more about personality than looks.

 

[Helter Skelter]

Mister Al

I prefer younger women, do you have to be within five years of the girls you are meeting? Are their other options? I hate the age thing, let them decide if I'm too old or not. age is just a number.

 

[MisterAl]

Helter:

The events are usually set up in age groups. There are usually age categories like 22-32, 25-35, 30-40 and such. I attend the 22-32 and 25-35 events.

They never check age when you sign up and I sometimes see guys in their 40s show up at the age group events I attend. Don't know how well they end up doing though.

 

[Clint Eastwood]

C'mon. DO you really need speed dating to do this?

What about the guy who is in college and can't see the point in forking over $20 to $30 just to talk to women.

The last time I found myself struggling with women, I didn't need the stupid internet dating or speed dating to have incredible success and a lot of confidence that went with it. I did it all for free. Even if I wasn't on a budget, I would have done things the same way.

I just went out on the street, to the malls, coffee shops, bookstores, and even grocery stores. I would just strike up a conversation with as many women as I could. I had a goal of at least three a day. And I always reached that goal, no matter how embarrassing or painful it was at times. In the beginning, it was super hard. I would have butterflies and just fall apart and say some stupid things. But it was never all that bad.

And within a few weeks, I got over the embarassment and got really good at it. Not long after, I had girls coming up to me all the time. I changed dramatically as a result of doing something that required great courage. Something that most guys can't bring themselves to do. And best of all, it was free. And not some "singles" event that told women I was "hoping" to hook up, or maybe even desparate.

I've hit rock bottom again. And guess what? I've tried internet dating. It was crap. It made me feel like a loser. I have no intention of trying speed dating. Instead I'm going right back to where I started. I start with the "hi" program, followed by conversations, followed by dealing with rejection. I didn't get to the dealing with rejection stage last time, because I had some girl fall madly in love with me. She became my girlfriend, because I had bad judgement. Won't happen again.

Have some balls. Be a man. Go out into the world and start talking to women. Don't waste your hard earned money on speed dating or internet dating. Your results will be far better in the end, and you'll feel a lot better about yourself. And when you hit rock bottom, like I have.... You won't get all depressed, because you'll know exactly what to do to get back on top.

And Tamales, even though I think that the guy should be the one to approach, it's not 1950 anymore. You can approach a guy and it won't be all that bad. If you have a problem dealing with rejection, pm me and I'll give you some tips. Two of my longer term girlfriends approached me. They both asked me out. One of them was a knockout, but one of them was a 5 on a scale of 1 to 10. If a 5 can get me to give her a chance when I have 8s and 9s wanting me, surely you can get about any guy you want. Next time you see a guy you think is really hot, approach him. It won't kill you. Trust me.

 

[Helter Skelter]

Burt Reynolds-


I can do it, but I hate walking up to strangers and saying hello, I just don't enjoy it and people pick up on that.

If that works for you, great. I prefer other methods. Good luck on your next film

 

[krd]

I think the big advantage to speed dating is that the women who are there to meet guys, and vice-versa. I can't think of any other place or event in the world where this is practically a guarantee. Women have guys bugging them all the time in bars, on the street, at work, etc., that they most likely just want to be left alone a lot of the time. At an event like this, that's not the case. The first barrier is down, because that's what everyone's there for. It makes it less uncomfortable for a guy, and I guess it's good practice too. Too bad there are no events like this in my boring town.

 

[MisterAl]

Well, if you're in college then you're already _surrounded_ by single women your own age! I'm so jealous, I wasted those precious years!!!!! They don't even do speed dating for college age because they know it's pointless.

However, once in the late 20s and 30s it sure does get much harder to find other single people. Sure I hang out in bookstores and all that, and there I see young kids or moms or whatever. I never meet anyone at work because most are older than me and/or married. I don't do bars or clubs because I never find the kinds of women I seek there.

At a speed dating event you're guaranteed a couple of things:
- Everyone is expected to be single
- Everyone expects to meet other single people.
- You know roughly what age they're going to be.

The ice is broken, and in the northeast where people are generally less friendly to strangers, that's very important.

I find that a couple types of women attend speed dating:

- A brave woman who goes by herself to meet interesting men. Rare, and most likely to be a teacher or nurse who NEVER meets men in her professional life.
- Curious young woman open to new things who has convinced some friends to go with her.
- The friends of the above woman. They are useless and not really looking anyway. They make up about 1/3 of the female attendees.

 

[STR8UP]

Hey Tamales,

It doesn't make you a loser to explore alternative avenues for meeting people. You are likely to meet the same cross section of people on the internet or speed dating that you would in your local Publix or Barnes and Noble or whatever.

You should consider learning to get over the stigma issues.

 

[tamales]

Hi GUys and thanks for the replies. I am still on the fence about it and didn't realize you actually had to pay! LOL. As far as internet, I am with CE on that. I mean if it works for people then great but it's just not for me. If that's placing a stigma then so be it.

I do agree tho that it's not all that easy to meet people but it's not impossible and I think it depends on your attitude. I mean every minute, second of everyday, we are all in a position to meet new people at work, the store..like you all said.. so there's no excuse. I need to remind myself of that. But since I don't approach men, I have to wait for them to do so. I know it's old fashioned but I won't be the first one to ask a man out. Never. Not my style. I do think tho that I could flirt more and be more readily approachable as to not intimidate men I like.

Usually, I have met guys when I least expected it. When my hair was a mess and I was on my way back from a run, or whatever...Funny story...

I had a couple and I swear this is true, start talking to me at the grocery store. The man said,"you are so cute, are you single, I know this sounds crazy but can i get your card, my son's friend is single, a doctor in the ER..he's a little short tho, do you mind" I was speechless but said sure why not and gave him my card. Now that might have been just as risky as the internet. And the guy actually called me and we have a date planned. I am nervous tho. Just how short is he

And best of all it turns out that my best friend since second grade who also works in the ER happens to work in the same hospital as him. Says, he is super nice..

And when we talked we said that we would both do the speed dating thing with my friend as well. I joked and said that it should be our first meeting. We would meet there and see if we would pick eachother out. Funny.

The point is I might try it or not. And sure put your self out there but I would have to say that CE is right about the men doing it are likely, to be real AFCs. I know my former DJ or any of my ex's for that matter wouldn't be caught dead speed dating. Not that I am ragging on those who have but it's hard for me to get past the sheer humor of it's enrire concept.

Dating today. Sigh. I mean think about all the people out there looking for someone special. It's amazing when you think about all the sites, matchmaking companies, even personal dating consultants. Thousands of dollars they are making.

We'll see but thanks again. For the guy on here who is going to Speed date for the first time, keep me posted on your experience.

 

[duke007]

I have no idea why a lot of people knock speed dating. It's nowhere near as bad as Internet dating, and it's time limited format makes it perfect for DJs to shine.

Come up with interesting and funny stories and make it way more memorable than just boring 'getting acquainted' chatter. And if everyone there is an AFC you will be in demand!

I don't know how these things are organised (with the matching part afterwards) but how much of a boost to the ego would it be if all the ladies chose you as the best date? You could have your pick of the bunch!

Even if there's nobody worth dating, it's still good practice. Cold pickups elsewhere involve 5-8 minute conversations anyway...