Speed dating - best way to follow up?

[VictorK]

Hello all,

I got out of a 4 yr LTR 6 months ago and decided to go to a speed dating event last week. Good news is I got 4 matches...but could use some advice on the best approach on how I should frame the follow up email. Should I ask for the date right away or suggest we talk on the phone first? I'm trying to find the best strategy that will make me stand out from the other guys emailing them. Thanks for the advice gentlemen.

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear Victor,
The telephone is sudden Death to early romance,use it only as a tool for quick messages.....In the past I have found myself in long conversations with people I hardly knew....It never worked,and the reason is very simple,well over two thirds of the messages we take in from People are visual,Body language if you like,it is just so easy to give a negative impression...
May I suggest you treat this in a similar way to Net Dating.....You ask her for coffee,and then make sure it does not last more than an hour,but have a clear agenda of options for a real date....In my experience candle lit dinners in an expensive Resteurant are also a bad move for early days,gives an impression that she is holding the cards,bad move that.Like Groucho Marx a lot of these Birds don't think that any Club that accepts them is good enough.....No Play her!!!....Walks,Dancing,the movies that sort of thing are far more productive....Good Luck Mate.

 

[Mike32ct]

Good advice about minimizing the phone conversations prior to the date.

I used to get WAY too comfortable on the phone and talk for an hour. Then I would get even more comfortable on the first date and chat for two or three hours. I didn't get any second dates that way. It killed any mystery and friendzoned me.

 

[VictorK]

Thanks gentlemen.

Well the results are in. I met 12 girls and had 7 matches. I am thinking that's a decent ratio. Now I have prioritized the list of matches and sent out a quick email to the first on the list. Good news is she replied back saying she wants to meet up. Bad news she says she has to travel for work which will delay meeting up for 2 weeks. She made a reference to keeping in touch between then by txt or phone. How should I play this? I have a feeling the txt or phone idea will kill the mystery and my chances. How do I keep the positive momentum
Going without becoming road kill