"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Read more...

SP: Acting on a IOI

SkyHigh

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Hey guys, has anyone experience this sticking point?

Picture this: your going about your own business, just getting the shopping done or whatever and you make brief eye contact with a nice sexy girl before continuing on with what your doing. At this point you don't know if she's interested and you don't really give it a second thought. You've got no plans on approaching, because if you approached every girl that you made eye contact with, you might as well be sarging.

While your selecting the apples, you spot her again a short while later. Except this time you notice out of the corner of your eye that she keeps glancing your way, A clear IOI! What happens next?

This is where my sticking point begins. Usually I'm so focused on what I'm doing it takes a while to register that all this is taking place. What happens next to me is long winded series of decisions
  • Should I snap into sarging mode?
  • Is she really my type?
  • Was that really an IOI?
  • What topics should I bring up if I do?
  • Where or what can I invite her to for a day2?

Excuses, excuses... then I either say to myself
  • "I've probably left it too late now" or
  • "I've decided not to go ahead with it.. i don't feel like sarging"

Even reading what I just wrote makes me want to ****** slap myself across the face and shout JUST DO IT! But deep down I know that although the 3 second rule would seemingly take care of most of my problem, it doesn't tackle what ever the real problem is. I don't have approach anxiety as such... once I have decided to do something I do it!

So what's my problem? My problem is that I take so long to make that decision. I feel like that there should be this little voice inside of me kicking me in the ass saying "Hot girl likes you! APPROACH APPROACH!!!" but I can't hear it unless I'm listening for it, and when I do hear it, it's not very loud. Is it possible my natural state of mind is not yet congruent with my sarging state of mind? Dunno. All I know for sure is that I need to speed up the time between spotting the IOI and deciding to approach.

I'm interested in hearing from others who has experienced a similar sticking point? What are your experience in overcoming it?

Regards,
Sky High
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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BLebowski

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Hear ya man. Fvcked it up too again last night. I have the bouts of overanalysis largely under control and snap out of it (took a lot of work), but sometimes it just hits you back in the face.

Oh well, there's always a next time. :box:
 

marinetti

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How about this: if you make eye contact, try saying hi or giving a short wave or something. If she stops to talk, the problem is solved. If not, you're a friendly guy and you have a great reason for stopping and talking if you see her again later.

I used to be incredibly picky about who I considered approach-worthy in day game. As in, in a bookstore filled with people, I would consider maybe 2 or 3 women approachable. To get over it, I just spent about a half hour or so walking around, simply looking at every woman I saw and deciding in my head if she was attractive or not. Somehow my libido had just shut off back when I was too nervous to even consider day approaches and as I result I literally did not see the attractive women around me.

This exercise helped open my eyes a bit, and now I feel like I have radar almost, even when I'm not planning approaching. Perhaps that would help?
 

Snow Plowman

Master Don Juan
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Fuk IOIs

IOIs is in the past

This is how I would've seen the situation if I was I was in that position.

I'm pickin apples, whatever, I see girl.
- "This chick wants me she is in proximity"
- "This chick wants me she keeps looking at me"

Frame - "Haha this chick wants me I'm going to have some fun with her"

"Hey, your cute I had to come meet you" (****y smirk, because I know she wants me)

The thing is all your excuses and all your searches for IOIs is irrelevant, because when you go in you just do. Whether the chick gives IOIs or not, who cares. The IOIs don't matter.
 
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