Sosuave Is NOT the problem

[improvingdonjuan]

Sosuave.com is not the problem, it is not the solution, girls are not the problem and they are not the solution.
The problem is not the website, the problem is not women, the problem is not your work, the problem is not your family, the problem are not your friends. If the problem is not your height, if it is not your nationality, if it is not you skin color. THEN you ask, IDJ, what IS the problem????

The problem is actually very simple, it is something you can correct, it is WITHIN yourself. If you are not satisfied with WHO you are , and WHAT you are about, if you are not TRULY happy with yourself; You will always have an emptyness within.

Look at yourself now.......trace your steps. Look back at what you have accomplished. Was it not a very big obstacle to talk to a stranger before?
was it not nerve recking to stablish a conversation with a beutiful girl?
do you remember the feeling when you went out on dates, how you wanted everything to be perfect, how you talked endlessly about yourself in hopes of impressing this beutiful woman infront of you. Do you remember how you did not want to "mess up", how you wanted to kiss up to her. REMEMBER! remember the time you though you were not good enough for her.

how far have you progressed since then!
you have seen reality!
you have learned to be you!
you are now, who you truly are, and do not apologize for it!

Now, you can choose to see the negative aspects or the positive. It is up to you, but i will tell you something my friend: do not seek happiness in seduction. Do not seek happiness in external factors, because at the end of the day, when they are removed, the emptyness within creeps back.
Have you made "gaming" girls your life? if you have; you will always need to have someone you are after, you will always need to have a conquest or the high will subside. You will look for a new catch, and then a new one in an everending quest to be happy and fulfill that hunger.

That hunger that you feel, that loneliness is your soul crying out for you.
YOU need to be happy by just being you. By just existing, by living a new day. Every single minute is different than the last, i will never type this same words again, not exactly the same, not in september 14 2006 at 11:21pm.
This moment will never repeat itself in history nor never has excisted before.

That is why you can change this moment, you have the power to change your history, YOU HAVE THE POWER TO CHANGE YOUR DESTINY.

 

[rocky_mtn]

You speak words of wisdom,

If I had to sum this all up in a handful of words I would say...

go up and talk to her, that is the easy part.

Be confident in who you are and what you want, thats is the more difficult, yet rewarding, part.

 

[Ace of Flames]

*Yawn*

Sorry, epic posts just don't really do it for me anymore. Too many of them on this site. I'm sure others are with me on this.

Oh right! Um, I totally agree... and all that good stuff. Or something. Its 3:16 in the morning here, and I'm going to end up staying up through the whole night, so take that as my excuse.

 

[nighter]

You are so right!

I had found myself. Before i was truly happy, and i did not care about if
i had a girl or not, i had other priorities in life. Be very good at bodybuilding for example.

Then i hooked up with the wrong girl. A girl who had a mentaly disorder "borderline"

At first i was god in her eyes.
She did everything for me. Then i suddently everything changed and she
tried to manipulate me, with the worst kind of manipulation you can think off.
It really felt she whanted to crush me. So i had to get rid off her.
To save myself.

So now iam sitting her with all this chaos inside and don't know how to find myself again. Call me weak if you like, but i can't help that i feel all this emptyness and pain inside, and i really try to make an effort to escape it.
I go to the gym to often for my own good, and every night i just run 1 mile with my mp3 player and try to think positive, and the weekends iam allways on the nightclub try to saarge girls, and because of the hole i got inside, i had made alot of progress because i try to push myself to the limit.

But the more i do, the bigger the hole gets inside. So i would be happy if someone could tell me , any good advice how i could find myself again.

 

[improvingdonjuan]

The best advice i can give you nighter, is to sit down for an hour or a couple of hours, get a pen and paper.
write down your entire life, write down all you remember.
just keep writing.

once you are done; look at it, what do you see?
it will give you a perspective of how you view yourself. It will tell you what is important for you, it will tell you what outlook you have. Out of all you see, highlight the high points in your life, to see where you are headed you have to look at your past.

write down your goals, write down your interests, write down what brings you joy.
write down what you want to change about yourself, GET TO KNOW YOURSELF, get to know your goals, get to know what makes you happy and always ask "WHY".
be HONEST with yourself, write exactly what you THINK, do not rationalize it or sugar coat it.

to FIND yourself YOU have to KNOW yourself.

GET WORKING.

 

[mrRuckus]

We can all become monks and meditate all day every day and just retreat into our own brains.

 

[mrRuckus]

this forum is filled with idiots... it was a nice post, but find a forum where it will be more useful, its falling on deaf ears.

Wow you've been talking to deaf people for 800 posts.

 

[krasnyiLion]

sad really. Everyone blames the board for their failures. I read how people talk out of their *ss, how this board is more addicting than useful. Yeah, and the board TRULY is not the problem. Although IDJ has been posting a lot of inner game, phylosophical stuff, i think that it is necessary to hear and be told not to forget our inner game. When is all set and done, we feel empty, or we lose track of what we were trying to acomplish.
Yeah i remember how it feels like to try to impress a girl and be PERFECT and be walking on eggshell.
I have come a long way. i do accept i am just a beginner but i will get there.

 

[logicallefty]

this forum is filled with idiots... it was a nice post, but find a forum where it will be more useful, its falling on deaf ears.

This forum is WAY low in # of idiots compared to some of the other forums I am on.

Current profession: law enforcement

Previous profession that I still keep up with sometimes: IT/computers..

These two fields combined have more egomanic psychos on the Internet on message boards than the entire country of India has in total population.

Trust me, this forum here is a sane place...

 

[logicallefty]

sad really. Everyone blames the board for their failures. I read how people talk out of their *ss, how this board is more addicting than useful. Yeah, and the board TRULY is not the problem. Although IDJ has been posting a lot of inner game, phylosophical stuff, i think that it is necessary to hear and be told not to forget our inner game. When is all set and done, we feel empty, or we lose track of what we were trying to acomplish.
Yeah i remember how it feels like to try to impress a girl and be PERFECT and be walking on eggshell.
I have come a long way. i do accept i am just a beginner but i will get there.

I use this board just for reassurance quite a bit.. I think most of us on this board think on close to the same wavelength, and we are all striving for the same goals: self improvement. I think hearing what other similar people have to say about similar subjects is a good thing. That's why I come here. This board has helped me a lot and been a big factor in my journey from AFC to DJ, but I don't give it all the credit, and still believe I have far to go.

99% of my buddies are either married and clueless or AFC and clueless, so I like having a place I can talk to other guys who aren't in either one of those categories.